Reddit Haikus

[deleted] better
     yet, hold a power supply
up to her stomach.

I haven't been gone
     from the system too long, less
than a year actually.

That's definitely
     what I'll miss most when I leave.
They were his buddies!

The next house we were
     prepared to make a bid right
away and got it!

He said that you are
     allowed to defend yourself
with reasonable force.

I was in the same
     boat and was able to work
and improve my form.

Many religious
     parents discuss religion
with their children, though.

game looks awesome, i'll
     have to check it out once im
gainfully employed!

His logic is sound.
     Some people find happiness
in lack of logic.

You... were not asian.
     Unless there was a third Ash
who looked just like you.

This drink has been made
     since the 70's under differing
names, but this is wrong.

if anyone will
     ever finish the download,
PLEASE MAKE A MIRROR!!!!

The biggest trouble
     I've had thus far is getting
media coverage.

Whatever you do,
     don't admit to anything.
Gimme your man card.

I deal with Windows
     at work, I'd rather not deal
with it at home, thanks.

Every single time,
     someone will click to expand.
And then they will groan.

I don't think active
     pause works in multiplayer,
but I could be wrong.

And if you don't kill
     your target the damage gets
(partially) refunded.

According to you,
     Strength Sap is the same. But do
you see the problem?

One of the best Park
     events I've ever been to,
You should look it up.

It's like comparing
     The New Adventures of Old
Christine to Seinfeld.

The way I have found
     to deal with it, is to try
and fall back asleep.

[deleted] Either
     your glaze was runny or you
put a thick coat on.

I want to claim dibs
     on being able to use
the WORD "Bar Mitzvah".

Don't just assume you
     know their character based on
who they fall in with.

In a similar
     fashion, you hear sound, but feel
the wind. Oscar Wilde.

This is my first one
     so of course its shitty but
keep it to yourself.

Is that so? I mean,
     I hate to drag the Nazis
into this. Okay.

There would of course be
     people, lots of people, on
those ships full of guns.

[deleted] fucking
     GENIUS! I would never had
thought of it like that.

Looks like someone was
     corrected on their grammar
one too many times.

If you're mad at me
     for something, fucking tell me.
I don't play head games.

I actually did "go
     off" on her once concerning
the poster project.

Your commentary
     is, honestly, annoying
and uninteresting.

She went from going
     out with you, straight to engaged
to somebody else?

What I'm saying is,
     its not the first time something
like this has happened.

That to. wasn't sure
     if marinates counted or
not No problem. Thanks!

How about a mode
     that makes it when a team takes
your wool you join them?

[deleted] Are there
     luminary specialists
in the industry?

Pick up a hobby
     or start studying something
you really enjoy.

If something doesn't
     work in theory, it won't work
in reality.

When I was shopping
     for my car, it was either
that or Candy White.

[deleted] This is
     probably why my friend pool is
getting rather low...

With great power, comes
     great responsibility.
Use it well, my friend.

THIRTY YEARS AGO.
     Not kidding. Yeah, I just might
have to pick one up.

eh, what do I know,
     I'm just another asshole
on the internet.

I also don't think
     the OP ever said he spoke
for all black people.

YEAH! GO BUTT LADY!"
     or maybe the credits from
Final Justice. Hell!

I'm a Rangers fan.
     I nearly got ran over
by a car today.

You wanna join us?
     I'm just pointing out the rules...
Who said I didn't care?

Why injure yourself
     for a few dollars and hour?
I mean really. Why?

Every game between
     the Heat and Bulls this year was
slighted towards the Heat.

When we first started
     dating he proclaimed that these
were better than sex.

When he starts talking
     he just makes everyone want
to stop and listen.

I think I gave some
     clear reasons why I prefer
one to the other.

I've enjoyed the Slim
     immensely, but I'll never
"forgive" microsoft.

Meanwhile, a young Red
     Forman from "that 70's show" is
laughing in the back.

I just thought this was
     kinda ironic. edit:
My apologies.

But I am gonna
     tell you your opinion sucks
(in my opinion).

Its not immune, its
     just that torrents have far far
more people to catch.

Congratulations!
     You are now a subscriber
to the world of life!

We then see this short,
     old guy walk through this crowd, ass
naked, with three legs.

Read all the subject
     matter you can get your hands
on in a weekend?

Karma points are just
     pointless digital points, no
result in real life.

Sometimes kids can be
     oddly insightful about
their family's issues.

Also, who decides
     what is a decent question.
ANSWER THE QUESTION!

Worth looking it up.
     :D Scopolamine, or "devil's
breath" I like your nose.

Feminism is
     about giving women rights,
that's not anti men.

I do the same thing,
     but with two monitors and,
at the moment, Lost.

I was very pleased
     with the way they handled it.
No not this at all.

If the highest bid
     is more than the lowest ask,
they fill each other.

Do you understand
     the difference between market
weight and equal weight?

And this is, again,
     a technique used to bring more
women to the club.

I will try to make
     the next one less offensive
to people with ED.

However, my waist
     and hips have lost an inch or
two since I started.

That was a romance
     novel waiting to happen
Not if you're laid off.

God dammit. It's been
     years since this happened. Fuck you.
I was eating lunch.

I'm from Belarus
     and I speak Russian, so if
you need help ask me!

My dad ran over
     both of my legs and I was
completely fine too!

Unfortunately
     that is not is abundant
supply anymore.

I hope you have good
     luck with wherever you might
venture off to next!

You look a lot like
     Chris Brown, particularly
in that last picture.

I do this every
     night too, finally someone
I can connect with!!!!

If you took that much
     time writing all that out, you
better get some help.

Turns out it's an ad
     for the energy drink can
he had on his head.

If guns don't show up
     during such events, then where
exactly are they?

I know you want proof
     but I think it will take some
time to find that post.

Some people may like
     cities for their entire
lives, that's cool. Some don't.

If you're focusing
     so much on them, you probably
*should* break up with her.

From what I have seen
     so far if anything then
2h comes out winning.

Outside of it, you
     see normal people being
driven to murder.

The message is what
     is upsetting, it says "you
are inferior".

[deleted] fucking
     what the fuck! Gorgeous! So high...
I see what you mean.

A lot of metal
     bands try to hard to just be
heavy and insane.

Yes, a lot of jokes
     are made about women, but
the same counts for men.

Posting a comment
     isn't at all comparable
to posting a link.

My mom and dad were
     "considering their options"
after I was born.

that he is writing
     for legitimate people
instead of addicts.

The one on the pic?
     Or something else? Holy shit,
that's ridiculous.

International
     law regards war crimes distinct
from regular crimes.

My mom and I used
     to be at each others throats...
But we're best buds now.

It's pretty basic,
     some minor adjustments should
be made, but great work!

Just a heads up, Lots42
     wants to hunt you down and punch
you in the anus.

It was in the most
     recent episode, at some
point during his speech.

Am I the only
     one who thinks your mom's response
is really creepy?

If i have to go
     to see Chicago this is
close enough for me.

Most importantly,
     train up to that point, don't just
start it all at once.

because not to be
     up myself, but I'm easy
to get along with.

Oh did I mention
     I'd been drinking? Yea I'm proof
Darwinism fails.

*Prologue*: I did not
     witness this personally, but
I saw the pictures.

I believe I'll be
     needing a PM as well
Thanks for the reply.

Whether you agree
     with his approach or not is
your prerogative.

Mainly, restrictions
     involved sitting at a desk.
That was the core part.

Very cute cat, but
     the son part makes me feel all
weird on the inside.

I gasped at that part..
     D: I can see why, thank you!
read more carefully.

Completely agree.
     It has made weed a different
kind of drug for me.

So we decided
     fuck it, we'd go to Subway.
So my mom drives us.

Spanking your kid is
     not morally abhorrent.
*You fucking pussy.

Are you implying
     that humans behaved without
logic before that?

It's not priced as high
     as crafts or as heavy, but
still tastes good IMO.

People tend to let
     their racism influence
choices when they can.

Unfortunately,
     these days, almost all science
is politicized.

You think that this is
     just what you look like when you're
slightly malnourished?

You leave!" Me- "Ok...?"
     Damn, you do get crucified
on karma, don't you?

If you can distract
     more than half of their team, you
deserve all the points.

I can easily
     get my cat pictures elsewhere.
I had one of these!

Maybe it would help
     if you also thought about
the bigger picture...

No women like men
     who are insecure about
their balding hairline.

It was only our
     first time being sexual
partners together.

Wow, really because
     I took it in my bathroom?
Lol thanks, though.

I guess my question
     is, what do you see your role
in all of this as?

oh boy, you must be
     very delusional if
that's what you figured.

Don't shit where you sleep.
     Dammit no. But also yes.
Don't eat where you sleep.

See, even people
     I know don't reassure me
and say "sure you would!

Things you or I do
     that have hard consequences
mean nothing to them.

Awesome! What did you
     make the pouch hanger out of?
something "brave" something.

Also, bench stepped up
     *huge*. Yea, I'm kinda happy
to see them advance.

We don't care who is
     in the picture, you always
block the name and pic.

If they were using
     the word "jew" negatively,
I would not like it.

How'd you even get
     drunk with all that food in you?
You're an animal.

I didn't even think
     about this, him and rampage
could actually fight now.

If two Dragons are
     the same distance, you may choose
which one to go to.

Sometimes couples want
     to split up, not liking each
other any more.

The campus parking
     lots on Lake Michigan are
pretty amazing.

[deleted] Except
     for the ones that shoot and kill
innocent people.

The next app will be
     somewhat less messy and you
will learn even more.

It wasn't clear what
     you were saying and I jumped
to a conclusion.

I don't mind heights, but
     for some reason, this picture
kind of freaks me out.

Now I always write
     that way even though it does
look like kid writing.

I can't remember
     the reason, but she threw some
sort of facts at me.

I agree not just
     as a woman, but also
as a scientist.

I think the answer,
     unfortunately, to all
the questions is no.

It's funny that all
     your playoff success never
came through the garden.

They'd give us problems.
     They'd put up a fight. They'd get
one, maybe two wins.

It's crazy and eve
     n hard to believe at times.
Omg... me too.

This is beautiful.
     I'd buy it from you. These aren't
even all of mine!

I'd buy it from you.
     These aren't even all of mine!
That is what I meant.

If it was truly
     *taboo*, it wouldn't be all
over the TV.

This was a really
     long explanation to just
say "I'm a pussy".

Knowing how to talk
     to the police can save you
thousands of dollars.

Some decent stories
     but I didn't think they would be
considered cannon.

I still want to see
     this crack pairing in some form.
Just to make me laugh.

Don't do that shit, bro.
     Go be a faggot somewhere
else, on your own post.

You don't understand
     genetics enough if you
truly believe that.

But they're different from
     gays who are sexually
attracted to men?

The same thing happens
     with marbles, just on a less
noticeable scale.

Ropes get tucked neatly
     away in their respective
rope bags underneath.

When my stomach calmed
     down I wrapped up what was left
and put it away.

Edit: grammar Hulk
     smash dat ass "NO SON OF MINE
IS GOING TO RENT.

YOU'RE GOING TO BUY
     A HOUSE, AND LIKE IT." Nope, just
from the living room.

My grandma was up
     visiting, and decided
to clean the window.

And it would be nice
     to see a company rise
up from near the start.

The only people
     making money in comics
are the filmmakers.

These definitely
     should be worth far more points than
you're giving for them!

[deleted] yes Did
     I? I've never seen the show,
but my friends might've.

In a few days, when
     the forged check bounces, you'll be
left holding the bag.

Why should anyone
     care what this guy has to say
about anything?

I also somehow
     missed the one with the crash, boy
was that confusing.

Then again, I don't
     get cutting springs and nasty
body kits, either.

And worse, none of those
     people cared even a week
after it happened.

It is very good
     looking, and it is also
very durable.

and arrogant Yeah,
     just lose that hair and I don't
think you'd look too bad.

This is pretty much
     exactly what I wanted
to do with my case.

I used to be much
     more liberal, and was very
much for gay marriage.

People like him aren't
     fazed by trifles like logic
or reality.

I think he just got
     the master track and put his
own rap over it.

On the shoes, if you
     mean without laces, then yes
but they are leather.

Not trying to be coy,
     but can it load files onto
iOS devices.

It wasn't until
     three years later that I lost
my virginity.

Then again, nothing
     beyond mathematics can
be known for certain.

[deleted] Are you
     hosting a family of birds
on top of your head?

Speaking of people
     named Warren Ellis (different
person, I know, BUT!

I've got mine. I won't
     share with you. I won't help you.
You don't deserve it."

I've got mine. I won't
     share with you. I won't help you.
You don't deserve it."

Sure, everyone should
     be fairly compensated
for the work they do.

Exercise. You won't
     feel like it, but it will help.
Or medication.

It's fucked up yea i'm
     sorry i just couldn't get
very far in this.

Anyone not on
     top of this coming trend just
got left in the dust.

I would like to share
     this grand secret with you but
I think you're a chick.

[Here is how I feel
     when I hear christians saying
that they are "oppressed.

Maybe the "simple
     minded" can learn a thing or
two by watching it.