Reddit Haikus

I would if I had
     one Too late for Tall ships, too
early for space ships?

You're not the Fonz dude.
     ...This is actually a really
interesting question.

Exact kind of stuff
     I am looking for, but damn
is it expensive.

Damn California
     and their idiotic 10-round
magazine limit...

You should really lay
     off misinterpretation
and making things up.

Though I imagine
     this figure is cherry picked,
it still speaks volumes.

I can bend my leg
     at the knee and bring my heel
up past my hip bone.

With sugar cane, you
     usually plant cuttings from
another cane plant.

So does alcohol.
     But weed moreso. How did
you capture the screen?

Governments exist
     to defend from enemies,
and enforce contracts.

Content is data
     which is completely different
than a container.

It's yours. It's not like
     you're really going to steal
any of the songs.

After all, you would
     have to drive away after
you were pulled over.

I think the mistakes
     were made much, much earlier
than the invasion.

Since this is a game,
     meant to entertain, this line
because pretty blurred.

The main thing I would
     like to stress is that try not
to think so short term.

When exactly did
     the future happen and who
didn't tell me. Sounds good.

Great first! I've only
     been doing this for a year,
so it's hard to tell.

[deleted] Just wait
     until it throws shit at you,
you'll then disown it.

Glad to at least be
     caught up, though, knowing a few
hectic days ahead.

Once ready to start
     the next process, have them, or
yourself, poop it out.

The best part are his
     faceless, wooden expressions.
He's perfect for porn.

Once you are past those
     and can go to any quest
hub, it gets better.

As a new player
     though, you might devote a lot
more time than you should.

If anyone wants
     one, feel free to PM me,
I'll send one your way.

So Men... MAKE THE MOVE.
     It's been your job for a while
to make the first go.

This guy was skinny
     hell, and had a beard that would
impress Zeus himself.

We should try kissing
     in front of our parents, you
know, to freak them out.

I have a couple
     friends and relatives who swear
that they have seen ghosts.

I got some nasty
     looks for the dudes when I said
I'd take it from there.

Measure. If there are
     too many stitches per inch,
use a larger hook.

Thanks. I will read all,
     and I will save what I like
in my Delicious.

If by straight you mean
     not on other drugs, then that's
probably for the best.

Phew! Alright, too much
     obsessing and worrying
for one night for me.

In that case, you are
     treating people differently
because of their sex.

All brought about by
     borderline psychopaths raised
by distant parents.

Brian? I never
     thought a picture could make me
so hard so fast. Thanks.

There are some okra
     dishes that you will die for.
Like smothered okra!

If you've ever done
     drugs, its like the best drug you've
ever had (morphine).

It was a Pumpkin
     Head contest with the local
radio station.

True enlightenment
     is when there is no longer
any ignorance.

Heh I also missed
     those two for the same reasons.
Get out of my brain!

having a common
     name and living in a big
city will do that.

There are more blood cells
     in the Milky Way than blood
cells in your body.

That's the furniture
     that Sarah Kerrigan would
have inside her house.

For all the people
     who got here after it was
deleted, thank you.

I've met very few
     people who enjoy leveling
over and over.

Meanwhile, dangerous
     driving (by both cars and bikes)
is largely ignored.

[deleted] Oh noes!
     You must live in a very
lawless area.

all those things that YOU
     can't live without, well guess what,
i can and i have.

I'd call 'em shadow
     spirits more than ghosts, at least
what I saw and felt.

Thanks... Guys will be guys
     but you're right, it over steps
the mark in my eyes.

I figured it'd
     get no attention and I'd
move on with my life.

I don't rank up teams
     who need help and don't control
their own destiny.

Anyone know what
     software was used to create
the animation?

What did I just read?
     There were words there, but only
some of them made sense.

I'm doing MY part!
     I love you guys! You never
fail too amaze me.

Radio stations
     often do an annual
childrens fund raiser.

A person with no
     principles will always act
as a hypocrite.

Also, wall of text.
     British common law is based
on *Mosaic Law*?

I would say it is
     not going their way at all.
[deleted] Good point.

Or perhaps something
     entirely different will
manifest itself.

Playing too slow or
     too fast can have negative
effects to my score.

I try to not look
     at with an entirely
negative outlook.

I was the music
     director at my college
radio station.

LISTEN TO THIS MAN!
     HE SPEAKS OF THINGS OF UTTER
IMPORTANCE BRILLIANT.

You can get a door
     with three bolts, one at the top,
middle and bottom.

Could you at least read
     the transcript to the Wagner
music I linked to.

You need to rethink
     your life if you think this shit
is OK, it's not.

Your game will be shit
     but it will look and sound great.
pic2 ain't bad either.

go farther into
     Europe, you guys still have some
issues to work out.

[deleted] actually
     interested, what is lupus
and what causes it?

I'm pretty sure I'm
     completely wrong by the way.
Edit: I was right.

Consider the fact
     that I am a trans woman
and read it again.

Being insane is
     lacking the ability
to notice patterns.

You wanting to be
     more specific doesn't make
his math deficient.

But the internet
     always waits for the sex tapes.
Sex tapes or it's fake!

Although I do like
     the unofficial mascots
that are the green men.

Now you take this home,
     throw it in a pot, add some
broth, a potato.

This will pass. If you
     don't like the way you're living
your life then change it...

Cooks Illustrated
     really like that knife, came top
in one of their tests.

Ten? Can't seem to find
     that figure for the number
killed by bicyclists.

In that case, you can
     get a refund before you
start the tournament.

Your girlfriend is still
     probably gonna be pissed, come
armed with al the facts.

Please enlighten me.
     I've not gotten a single
whisper for a port.

At the time I was
     thinking how can a new tax
create a new job?

THANKS FOR TYPING IT.
     I AM GIVING YOU A SMALL
PRAYER TO SAY MY THANKS.

It's an autoimmune
     disease and no one really
knows what causes it.

Well... I guess he'll be
     celebrating Thanksgiving
with us for awhile.

I know that now, but
     at the time I was clearly
stupid and evil.

Shit! She already
     said that she wants to "clean up"
the media! What?

However, if you
     are truly worried, you can
opt out of the scans.

They all look alike
     in those games lol SURE
IS WIZARD IN HERE.

I SEE WHAT YOU DID!
     AM I SMART FOR CAUSE OF IT!?
Ah!!! Don't tell me that!

you people are nuts.
     In the high school world, they were
were the lower class.

[deleted] We take
     great pride in our digital
audio cables.

I just thought it was
     interesting and thought I'd share,
back up off my nuts.

On another note,
     Keith Morris is way cooler
than Henry Rollins.

Their games against teams
     like the Kings were just massive
offensive paced games.

Unfortunately,
     I'll have to agree with what's
already been said.

These tools are way too
     expensive for anyone
to buy on their own.

Same logic as "it's
     cold outside, where's this global
warming you speak of?".

But even the best
     stuff never made me feel like
I felt my first time.

At least you can buy
     your own airplane with enough
money to fly it.

She needs to let me
     give her a complete exam.
[deleted] Perhaps.

You realized that just
     when your thought process started
as a little kid.

I don't understand
     why castration of rapists
isn't more common.

Some days it's just like
     "is this a dream" but even
less real than a dream.

I'm a bit too old
     to care if I am having
fun to be honest.

We have great things like....
     A lot of water and some
starving Africans.

I sit behind him.
     he kept screaming while i was
trying to watch south park.

This area is
     only accessible by
flying characters.

Umm.. Turn Black and White,
     bump contrast and black levels,
local dodge and burn.

Literally. My hand
     is on my bare dick right now.
Nothing sexual.

You're at a stoplight
     in the crossroads of your life.
Now's the time to pick!

Or leave video
     game scripts to video games.
[deleted] What game?

Seriously, shut
     the hell up about shit you
know *nothing* about.

Mr. Brain's Faggot
     Family. That kid looks ready
to die. Life ruined!

'Cause to my high ass,
     this sounds like a cry for help...
you can talk to us.

I'm watching right now.
     This made me feel bad about
what I was doing.

I suppose one could
     say the same thing about red
blood cells and stars though...

I've never even
     had a kill with Nova gas,
just tons of assists.

[deleted] Being
     my ancestors came over
on the mayflower.

I don't like to hike.
     I don't like to ski. I don't
like to meditate.

It can however
     accept people who have those
kinds of fantasies.

The stress leads to more
     health problems, both in the poor
and in the wealthy.

did this man forget
     to put even a single
bolt to his tires?

Also you can both
     not believe in god and not
care about belief.

I went in a guest
     and was shown around the map.
Looks nice and friendly.

[deleted] That was
     the whole point. To piss YOU off.
Specifically you.

It's just pretty hard
     to determine how you feel
exactly sometimes.

the fact that you don't
     recognize Richard Branson
doesn't surprise me.

I can't really blame
     anyone for wanting just
one or the other.

I've managed so far.
     Perhaps I'll splurge when I start
my new student job.

Perhaps I'll splurge when
     I start my new student job.
Thanks for info though.

Nor does it require
     more assumptions, it simply
requires different ones.

It's economics.
     American doctors get
paid per procedure.

This one over here
     is going up your narrow
fucking Irish ass.

Man, I can't even
     get a goat, what percentile
does that leave me in?

Shit! She already
     said that she wants to "clean up"
the media! What?

Whilst the need for not
     panicking is important,
swine flu was no joke.

This device cannot
     be programmed for all terrains
and situations.

Otherwise it's been
     networking, working my way
up, etc.

And why would they put
     so much effort coming out
here in the first place?

I mean, honestly,
     can anything posted here
meet that requirement?

I'm tired of all
     the blame being directed
at younger drivers.

If we wait to long,
     that right may be gone before
we do have the chance.

I don't leave food down,
     and he gets no more in each
feeding than he should.

I'm clearly asking
     for advice from people who
are not my boyfriend.

(and feared for the near
     future) Domino effect.
It's all connected.

Power needs to be
     present for any corrupt
act to manifest.

Nations are myths, things
     that bind people together
in nations are myths.

So, what do we need
     to be doing to strengthen
our protections there?

Well presumably
     I know you haven't so far.
Don't go fuck yourself.

So I assume you
     won't be telling your children
about Santa Claus?

Now, you take this home,
     throw it in a pot, add some
broth, a potato.

Street View in Berlin
     is rapidly becoming
ugly and useless.

"What's it about?" "Em,
     well, it's still in the very
early stages, so....

They are embarrassed
     and their good mood is ruined.
They worry for you.

You should have just spent
     that extra money on food.
*Dyslexic, but cheers!

If you insist on
     caffeine, just get simple pills
at the pharmacy.

Why is it a drought
     occurs when you have a clear
schedule and days free?

I honestly didn't
     think changing the hook size would
change the piece at all.

Check. Depression. Check.
     Acceptance.... Maybe this game
will be that last step.

Jewish tradition
     also thinks it was Satan.
Classic! Very nice.

Your definitions
     here are, at least, misleading
in my opinion.

Everything they want
     from their computer is right
at their fingertips.

I'd go for preview
     You're right, of course. But you can't
give them that window.

Avoid alcohol,
     smoking, kissing and other
bodily fluids.

If Nixon hadn't
     gotten cold feet, we could've
been on **MARS** right now!

Again, nobody
     *wants* to stop exporting these
materials, but...

As an example,
     a westerner may ask "How
was I created"?

Butter pastry is
     the **only** orthodox crust
choice for pumpkin pie.

Just buy the yearly
     subscription and say goodbye
to monthly charges.

You can run each map
     from one end to another
in a few minutes.

I met someone who
     met a real Indian once,
she said he was nice.

I'm kinda confused.
     You're talking acoustic, right?
Just play sitting down.

Also, how very
     brave of you to post a pic
in a bikini!

If only the kid
     had any idea who
he was going as.

Humans do not live
     and act because they are forced
to by entropy.

And what reason do
     you have to believe he didn't
in fact create it?

Happened to click on
     your name and saw you talking
about your boyfriend.

The description seems
     more accurate to me than
these things normally do.

If the US like their
     straight roads and ditto crossings,
so be it. Awesome.

Anyway, thank god
     we don't split the stands the same
here in Morocco.

Its a shame because
     these conversations are worth
having and hearing.

I believe I do
     not need to explain you what
this word mean, do I?

[deleted] Every
     day is a fucking law &
Order marathon.

Kinda worrisome
     how little attention has
been paid to it here.

But then I get wrapped
     up in how I'd actually feel
if she took her life.

Then cough up, it's not
     that bad an estimate, though
you might shop around.

The question is what
     exactly is a desktop
version of Linux.

In my opinion,
     there are only two races:
robot and human.

Heh, I'll kind of give
     that one to you, but that's not
really what I meant.

Did you know he was
     against abortions when you
started dating him?

[deleted] But what
     if your boss finds ou Nah who
gives a fuck. Enjoy!

Nobody here is
     saying that consensual
drunken sex is rape.

If she's screaming "yes
     yes yes" all night she doesn't
get to change her mind.

I don't mean to scare
     you, but marriage lasts a long
time, and people change.

Is she still a mod?
     OK I have to know what
the hell this thing is.

How is it people
     get away with that over
and over again?