Reddit Haikus

I'm predicting you
     were offended by someone
also in the Church.

However, typing
     is pretty slick and the apps
are pretty awesome.

It wasn't easy,
     but Canada's doors were more
open than today.

Take a walk downtown
     east side vancouver sometime.
Not too bad really.

Also, I don't quite
     understand the argument
for marijuana.

I pull it in then
     out, then back in and inhale
like a coke addict.

It's very easy
     to fall behind and really
hard to make it up.

Go to office hours
     if you have questions or want
advice on something.

this was great I just
     went to a shoot with the girl
on the left, Sara.

Would I watch again?
     No. Did I enjoy it? Yes,
making fun of it.

And, why would you want
     to see what happens when truth
meets lies? DON'T JUDGE HIM.

I came to this thread
     expecting to see something
about a dry dock.

Does anyone else
     have this problem or know how
to get around it?

What is your best friends
     mother or aunts maiden Name?...
Its all relative.

It won't keep them fresh,
     but it will keep them dry when
someone spills their beer.

It will make any
     dull car become fun to drive.
Checking them out, thanks!

Wish my phone had been
     this awesome out of the box!
Christ.. i didn't read that.

Yeah, definitely
     fast flow but my periods
are always shorter.

Why did she do it?
     Did she feel like she made her
point successfully?

What, that one was made
     by a very slow learner?
don't die foolishly.

Holy hell, I had
     no idea this thread was
as old as it was.

Have you always held
     this view on dating, or is
this a recent thing?

If it's a stranger
     in passing, it's usually
that I fell for it.

Always, always just
     stare directly at their crotch
until they're gone. Nope.

This gave them thirty
     child bearing years before death
in their mid forties.

Thanks for that. I LOVE
     YOU! Thanks so much! I will put
this to good use! Thanks!

And I've literally
     had discussions with hundreds.
Lead by example.

Well that sounds awesome,
     I'll take the electric one
off of your hands then.

One quick tip, maybe
     you can add some vertical
lines for the timeline?

Just don't take them, or
     set them back in the waiting
room on your way out.

I beat the end boss.
     I hesitated at first,
but then I thought "Wait.

This is the kicker.
     The banks stand to lose nothing.
Not even a dime.

Lebanon has way
     less people and Salem is
the state capital!

No, I meant why were
     you driving a car that you
knew wouldn't track straight.

So did I the first
     time I played it, lost the game.
Smells like skeletons.

So one day I was
     out and two of the ladies
thought they could do it.

This really has been
     the hardest part and you should
feel it breaking soon.

Welcome! It is tough
     to boil it down, since they all
have their own wrinkles.

I enjoy this show
     for pretty much the reasons
the author mentions.

Your costs and profit
     margin should already be
covered by this point.

*Tell my wife I said
     'Hello'* Are they still sending
keys out for beta?

Unfortunately,
     it was a very calm day.
I ran out of breath.

I would like to hear
     more about your "recently
getting your license".

and you are the one
     that talked about how you play
comp, and blah blah blah.

But "get eaten" is
     just awful. So 'bad porno'..
I can second this.

Anyways, he had
     no case whatsoever but
kept it up for months.

GOODNIGHT. so no chance
     that your pores are being clogged
by your makeup then?

Now, buy the biggest
     horse trailer your truck can pull.
It needs to be big.

The Joo takes the car
     keys and loads up the blankets
and stuff in the trunk.

I'm not one to add
     every friend request, but add
those that I do know.

Hyperinflation
     is conceivable, but not
in the near future.

I have four children
     and they are much smarter than
I was at their age.

The education
     system is much better now
than it was back then.

Ya caught me. So then
     these are your questions that you
want me to answer?

Indeed, the Vector
     has a tiny hip fire spread
even without SA.

it makes me happy.
     [deleted] hot damn! that looks
good enough to eat.

Ah i tend to wall
     off and boost zealots to keep
lings out of my shit.

Never drank or smoked
     but was accused of being
high very often.

[deleted] I like
     the reaction of the dude
at the computer.

Hot metal shavings
     Hah! Actually that sentence starts
with This and ends with.

So I'm quite certain
     by the time an outsider
sees it, it's covered.

Oh and I'm not too
     sure about this, but that fan
setup might be bad.

I easily use
     'epic' and 'Gary Oldman'
in the same sentence.

He was a bachelor,
     that worked on cars and didn't care
where the grease landed.

That clip was moving,
     and this guys is special, hope
he gets good support.

a real will bombard
     with you with counter questions
like what's your budget?

Could be, I thought I'd
     read that it was law before
but I could be wrong.

Delete his number.
     Kind of a rip off? You mean
you *want* to see more?

can i have some cake?
     What's with this "we can't do it,
we're poor" attitude?

Facilities like
     this benefit the city
and it's residents.

Definitely gives
     you a reason to clean up
your home screen as well.

all i say is hi.
     sometimes he's up and texts back
and we talk. it's nice.

Did you get it done
     in the chair or surgery?
Enjoy your days off!

I am a female.
     But I won't contest the not
having a soul part.

To put it simply,
     as speed increases, time speeds
up (for the traveler).

That chick needs to get
     off the internet and come
over to my house.

i meant that i get
     nervous when im trying something
new and ruin it.

Huh? [deleted] Does
     anyone else feel aroused,
confused, and worried?

Either make an odd
     face or put on my best troll
smile when going past.

Lovely Complex is
     hilarious, but kinda
stupid in places.

And why are you trying
     to convince me if you don't
think I own myself?

Also, I think you're
     wrong that neither team played well
in that seventh game.

Such a great build up,
     even though there aren't any
real horror moments.

I'm not saying it's
     not a good case, but it all
depends on your needs.

"Nowhere Again" by
     Secret Machines. And a loud
air conditioner.

Can I sign up right
     away without issue or
is it best I wait?

Does the phrase "fake, but
     accurate" ring any bells?
[(In case it doesn't.

Hopefully I won't
     remember any of what
I read here tonight.

I switched to the no
     name honey nut, and it does
not have this issue.

A little brother,
     that'd be a pretty big
turn off for a girl.

I got some grape juice...
     Whoa, whoa, what the Fuck is juice?
I want some grape drink!

Nice try. Though it IS
     younger than cave walls, I guess.
Lol, good one.

If the answer is
     short for both, you have nothing
to worry about.

If God can't control
     what prophets say, why listen
to prophets at all?

I can't help but smell
     my sweaters after being
in a house with one.

I doubt that the "myths"
     Luke wanted to throw in would
contain a census.

The base buttons (left
     hand) are organized just like
the circle of fifths.

From your overall
     tone, I don't think that is what
you meant to convey.

Stop treating women
     like princesses if they fail
to treat you like KINGS.

[deleted] But it's
     too late, i've already seen
everything Cheers man.

That is not proper
     evidence that there is some
kind of agenda.

The bag sits empty
     next to you as your family
holds your hand and prays.

Another person
     suggested those boss delays
I will check em out.

Thanks for the advice.
     [deleted] Sloth? You're going
to live with me now.

I cooked it until
     the flesh was properly white
and it was all good.

The absence of scent
     tricks your brain into thinking
nothing is a smell.

I doubt that the "myths"
     Luke wanted to throw in would
contain a census.

=P Well all I meant
     is that he wasn't selling
pounds or growing plants.

Thanks for the reply.
     I guess that's one vote for me
not being crazy.

Use the goddamn road,
     I don't care that there's no bike
lane and it's rush hour.

Why bother at all?
     Be the change you want to see
in the world fuckers!

What I took from it:
     A man's spirit will live on
through his creations.

My doctor's office
     is open six hours a day,
and he takes a lunch!

It's truly a joy
     to go barefoot down the road
or through the bushes.

That college isn't
     as heavily marketed
to their social group?

However, you missed
     "very unique" and "could care
less", Mr. Genius.

Great reason. You may
     miss cigarettes though, if it's
the only reason.

THEN WHO WAS POSTS Nope,
     just two teenagers being
stupid together.

Does Gasoline count?
     Lots of people like that smell
but I can't stand it.

[deleted] and how
     will the people get info
on who to vote for?

Try not to have him
     over and tell your sister
what's got you afraid.

This way the content
     is still a challenge, but is
still worth it to do.

[deleted] Cut grass.
     I mow other peoples lawns
mainly for the smell.

They'll be pretty much
     zombies, so there's not a lot
more you can do them.

I gotta admit,
     I have a fetish for this.
Edit: ignore this.

And that's what OP seems
     to be looking for, average.
I like the pie charts.

--Jane Kenyon, "Having
     It Out with Melancholy"
That's not true at all.

Net neutrality
     is going to be dead, or
is already dead.

I want to hear what
     people think before I spend
some real time on it.

I thought OT would die
     out but I have a quick look
at its all still there.

[deleted] Good luck.
     Shouldn't this be in science
or biology?

Should I wear something
     with American reference
since I am Asian?

Roger's cable is
     pretty good minus the cost,
so I'd go with them.

Really? Why would what's
     in your fridge make the lines freeze
and in turn run warm?

When I got into
     this business, I was Gung Ho
for single payer.

EDIT: People who
     get sterilized by the state
don't have descendents.

Congratulations
     you now have an INFINITE
number of wishes.

Like I said, I was
     hesitant about making
the comparison.

Finally they find
     the bear frolicking around
with another bear.

As for how they should
     be dealt with, hopefully by
the people themselves.

But these people should
     definitely not be left
to do what they do.

That college isn't
     as heavily marketed
to their social group?

For those who don't know
     what that is it's basically
rotten wheat, or grass.

I never really
     realized that before reading
your post. Probably not.

It was our pastor
     who convinced them to get me
professional help.

And calling money
     speech is a bankrupt notion,
no pun intended.

(ok, not quite) Yes,
     sometimes that *can mean* serving
customers better.

They would live close by.
     What part of *moisture farmer*
don't you understand?

American life
     can be really frustrating
for some I feel like.

I hope it doesn't
     get to that point but we'll just
have to wait and see.

EDIT: Wait a min
     what IS wrong with her shoulder.
and her other hand.

I love it. I am
     confused and absolutely
awestruck, lol.

Would you have wanted
     to spend the rest of your life
with someone like that?

What jackass doesn't
     remember Anna Paquin
from Fly Away Home.

This happened to me
     today, and I was fucking
pissed off at people.

You should probably kill
     yourself right now to reduce
your carbon footprint.

But yeah, you can still
     be considerate when you
make your appointment.

Once small ligament
     roster run filled dark make don't
sleep effervescent.

If he is really
     amazing in other ways,
don't give up just yet.

I will check it out.
     I do freelance, not full time,
but for extra cash.

My wife is VERY
     sexual and pretty much
wants it all the time.

However, that's not
     to say that software won't load
and respond faster.

Lots of hospitals
     have started the steph program
as you suggested.

[deleted] I think
     Zimbabwean currency
could have also worked.

Not having legal
     abortions available
can literally kill.

Don't talk to him much
     anymore but hopefully
he'll be up for it.

And that girl was from
     then on known as "Lazy Eye
Bitch" to me. That's cool.

I only did one
     brew in my plastic bucket
but it came out great.

This raises several
     red flags that can be simple
or problematic.

I actually have been
     part of City to River
since the beginning.

They are fast. I got
     pretty good at hunting them
down and killing them.

Donate your devil
     money to her church and see
if they tear it down.

Have cartoonists learned
     nothing from Garfield without
Garfield? Less is more!

Weird. Anyone else
     having this issue (as well
as OPs)? I agree.

He can turn the ads
     down, but it decreases is
income when he does.

But then I was like
     "yeah, that's how they pronounce it."
Skunk, but not up close.

I bet it would be
     great wrapped in bacon and cooked
over a nice grill.

I was a little
     picky, but she certainly
wasn't amazing.

Because people who
     know the law well aren't ever
corrupt crooks themselves?

...or, in other words,
     another couple of years
in the middle east.

I voted today
     :D Go Greens!!!! [deleted] ugh
you voted greens first.

I guess kind of cool
     to have your father acting
as your big brother.

I live in Boulder,
     though, so I don't pay too much
attention to him.

MC is exciting
     because it's about finding
things out by yourself.

It's a very fun
     and very stimulating
mental exercise.

[deleted] I thought
     you were supposed to say fuck
the lemons, and bail?

The scope is just WAY
     to big and I think people
need to realize that.

Waiting. he didn't say
     'hi' If you were a hotdog
would you eat yourself?

Good lord but I hate
     people leaving out the word
"bamboo" in this one.

-Don't associate
     this filth with what is still good
in America.

The thugs decided
     to teach you and your fellow
pussies a lesson.

(Hate it on hot days.)
     Got used to it on the job
when I was younger.

First time I ever
     wanted to smack a pregnant
woman in the chops.

Exact same concept.
     It's never too soon to joke
about dead babies.

Are Canadians
     largely in support of these
kinds of policies?

Hate to say it, but,
     we told you so. Just kidding.
I love to say it.

Nothing but repeats,
     reality shows and, well;
reality shows.

She told me it was
     caused by smoking, though I don't
know if that was true.

I have nothing else
     to add to the discussion,
thumbs up to your mom!

Last resort? Really?
     How do you defend yourself
without violence?

I know. Totally.
     I liked his response on me
"supporting both sides."