Reddit Haikus

Though, I know nothing
     about war, and respect what
you guys to no end.

YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
     MAN YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND MAN
WHAT IT IS TO ROCK.

Dude, he said the blue
     light freaked him out so he didn't
have time to finish.

Spews nothing but shit
     from his mouth, but god damn can
he tell a story.

Yeah defiantly,
     sometimes I need to eat on
my way back to work.

On a dating site.
     "my arrests are much the same
as my love making.

I have had several
     brand new thermostats that would
not open at all.

You mean ignoring
     the times when it was one man
and several women.

Mouthwash, Tylenol
     pain relievers, or sleeping
pills to sleep it off.

It's an article
     about the League of Women
Voters and health care.

If you let them fail,
     the bottom of the housing
market is a cave.

His point was that shit
     happens and countries go on
to host more events.

The other had been
     run off by the feral cats
that infest this town.

If you can find it,
     I recommend listening straight
though with headphones on.

It's beautiful if
     you like it, no matter what
other people say.

Still, it's extremely
     wrong to continue to live
with the molester.

She has to do them
     correctly otherwise you'll
give her a spanking.

Can you do heavy
     exercise or will that cause
you to lose control?

and 2moons support is
     the worst customer support
i've ever dealt with.

I miss Andy! Friends?
     I think we should form a cult.
You're an idiot.

Either I know you
     or this has spread far and fast.
Fuck conservatives.

You can also go
     to another doctor on
the insurance list.

Its not expensive.
     [deleted] I thought she was
engaged to [this guy.

It should also be
     illegal to buy and sell
political speech.

make it a job. work.
     all the time. no time for rest.
gotta stay healthy.

Look, I know it makes
     people form England, Scotland,
Wales etc.

If you do brake check
     just say you saw a black dog
run across the road.

God, the entity,
     may not exist but the word
"god" is very real.

Wait what? I've just moved
     to Canberra and am bored
as hell. Suggestions?

Seems like this recent
     flood of copycat posts is
starting to slow down.

My point is about
     the least hostile point one could
ever hope to make.

We had multiple
     conversations in that one
thread, and then, just, that.

it doesn't sound like
     the father has it very
together either.

You could tone that down
     somehow though and I don't think
people would complain.

I have a very
     slight understanding of him,
and I didn't get it.

It's not like these three
     things just suddenly appeared
out of nowhere. Right.

Very true Class1, but
     in all honesty we aren't
driving coast to coast.

That depends on what
     port you're docking in, Sailor.
What the fuck was that?

I find it akin
     to seeing a video
that says "Meth is rad!

Maybe she wants you
     to lose weight and wants to know
what are you eating?

You can do that but
     something tells me it won't be
very successful.

They fuck you up worse
     than whatever condition
was affecting you.

I realize this but
     I don't mind being honest
at my own expense.

Then the step after
     that is laser, but that's not
for the faint of heart.

[deleted] It's true
     although I think baseball is
boring regardless.

If the differences
     are significant, it tends
to wreck marriages.

Where????? [deleted] Drop
     your head on the concrete floor?
Most definitely.

Believe me, we *don't*
     want the computers to be
smart enough to talk.

Try not to work if
     you don't have to and finish
homework before play.

by the way, I will
     respect the diamond midget,
thanks for the advice.

Even to this day
     I have a strong attachment
to unexplained tales.

Change your legal name.
     Prank call people. Learn to laugh
at insanity.

If they want to be
     brown they can go to Gaza
with the rest of em.

Most of us grew up
     hearing it refer to that,
so not weird at all.

It's a camp. Move on.
     Focus your energy on
something positive.

And bring wine coolers.
     I would love to buy the whole
show on DVD.

Dead Kennedys were
     always a great fit for those
last few seconds. Yes!

Israel also broke
     the ceasefire and then launched
Cast Lead 'in response'.

I see no difference
     and agree that people need
to learn the hard way.

I'm kinda upset
     I didn't jump on that Steam sale
when I had the chance.

It smelled like fucking
     *AWESOME*. Dad? fuck Apartheid
Israel My mistake.

I don't know how you
     can say Sony has been shit
this generation.

Well. I think i may
     go ahead and freak out now.
Later (so to speak).

Wrong; this was the most
     mature and appropriate
way to handle it.

What's to compromise?
     She has no business in his
personal spending.

It's not the same oil,
     the fries and the patties are
cooked in different vats.

You don't want to be
     using an improperly
maintained glory hole.

[deleted] you will
     not go to jail [deleted]
The Lord of the Rings.

We agree. You just
     think create and destroy are
the wrong words to use.

[gestures up his nose]
     And when you die, it squirms out
and flies away. [Source.

They drink most of their
     calories so they really
hardly eat a thing.

Instantly I was
     prompted to download the first
part of the update.

True, but some people
     are dicks and trick new players
into things like that.

It's really just up
     to parents to teach their kids
about finances.

[deleted] Sorry,
     I was just guessing that you
were American.

I LIKE TO HARASS
     PEOPLE! I'M THE BIGGEST DOUCHE
ON THE INTERNET!

Citations needed.
     I entirely agree
with your point of view.

But for the cleanup
     part I think anyone could
do a better job.

Months? I bet you can't
     even make a microwave
cheese sandwich. Oh damn.

Cab ride. Fuck it Dude,
     I love this movie! You know
this how? "Feck" next, please.

This discussion is
     not about the conflict you
fucking mongoloid.

I've never even
     *played* any of them. He said
golf, not Simon says.

What year are we in?
     And your citation? What do
you want from science?!!!

Gotta keep a wet
     cloth handy to keep the old
bay off the lips. So?!

It's not ground breaking
     in the same way that deep blue
wasn't ground breaking.

In any case, it's
     not something that cannot be
calibrated for.

Horrible story,
     but I noticed he did not
say how old he was.

Also, this system
     was one of many projects
we had going on.

I like our subject
     better though, because he is
hopeful and joyous.

Is it possible
     to press it rapidly but
NOT repeatedly?

Yeah I think I was
     supposed to rhyme the last line
with the first two, tho.

Blow out to dislodge
     carbon black (you'll see smoke wisp
up and out of it).

We're in Britain though
     where EVERYONE watches it.
Even old people.

I was unhappy
     to find out how accurate
the episode was.

Then they will either
     make no move on this girl, or
do sweet "nice guy" things.

If there are other
     sides to the story, someone
usually finds out.

Your bed should be clean.
     And showering before bed
keeps it that way. Lies.

You'd be a person
     with role models, some better
than others. That's all.

"Oh well, I guess I'll
     get that ammo lying on
the floor over there".

Bah! Every. Single.
     Day.. God i wish i lived there
so i could take her.

Get some vampire fangs
     and fake blood and put it all
over yourself, too.

And that's exactly
     what the people in this thread
seem to be doing.

You know what other
     games have sold more than the whole
Diablo franchise?

Not sure if we still
     hold this title, but I guess
we did for a time.

There aren't that many
     variables in the red
dot gun sight design.

Maybe, but the "don't
     shit where you eat" mantra is
also relevant.

Nice revelation,
     lol But I think that's
as far as it goes.

That does require some
     level of scientific
rigor, I agree.

I know where I live
     (New Zealand), Day light savings
dates recently changed.

Let me at least tell
     you a reason why people
may be doing it.

Big Pussies chase Cock;
     Cock escapes. This is against
the laws of nature.

Its not a harder
     job its just that less people
want to do those jobs.

I've had them.. they look
     and taste like regular ribs.
They pretty tasty.

like this one being
     posted here is on some bright
yellow gradient.

These brands are very
     easy to apply and looks
beautiful on face.

They really shouldn't
     have been in the position
to lose anyway.

That little guy? Oh,
     I wouldn't worry about
that little guy. Sure.

It overtook worm
     wrestling in TV ratings
in the past five years.

[deleted] Nope, all
     forms of copyright law is
wrong if you ask me.

African culture
     requires that you get the snip
to become a man.

The whole process should
     be overseen by elders,
but often it's not.

So, the Government
     in the 90s put in a plan
to rectify this.

But as you said, there's
     no way of knowing that till
the load screen comes up.

If oil company
     know they are guilty, and knows
court will find that out.

Some say this Peter
     Parker might not have ever
existed at all.

I can't disable
     permissions on an item
by item basis.

It doesn't happen
     in some cities, Seattle
is not one of them.

Do you ever find
     yourself at work with black eyes
and blood on your shirt?

That's why it was all
     mined out, leaving the planet
completely hollow.

Arsenal players
     haven't figured much at all
in this tournament.

You can't fault someone
     for just wanting to bypass
the unpleasantness.

Can't we all just hate
     on the specific bitches
and dicks and play nice?

This is the worst part.
     Then the battle's not so bad?
Oh. Right. The battle.

[deleted] Well, all
     relationships end, either
in divorce or death.

It just doesn't sound
     realistic, certainly
less than divine! Church.

Yeah, at the moment
     I just seem to need more wood
than is growing back.

actually, the school used
     in the movie looks nothing
like my old high school.

I won't deny it.
     I'm pretty odd, even by
strange people standards.

I was never raised
     to believe faith in God was
all that important.

It's unbeatable.
     I saw that once... never thought
I'd find it again!

If you have any
     evidence, the onus is
on you to show it.

My thoughts exactly.
     He could be a voyeur. So,
how bad did it hurt?

But surely it should
     stop this, as anyone can
just 'corrupt' their files?

You don't know me, man.
     Hell, you don't even know what
you're talking about.

:D I'm wondering
     if the jump guide is popping
wood during this dive.

Maradonna has
     always been delusional.
Used to play well, though.

On nice days sometimes
     I'll just wander The Town. Oh,
you meant you look good.

Often times squatters
     run into things they don't need
but are still useful.

[deleted] That has
     to be the least scary thing
I have ever seen.

You don't want to die;
     you just want an easy, quick
solution to things.

Move on. If you can
     afford a computer, you
can afford the OS.

It's one of the main
     reasons I hardly play on
PC anymore.

I don't understand
     why companies would not be
guided their profit.

Enjoy! [deleted]
     If that were for sale, I would
buy it with money.

My favorite bit though,
     is the camera is filming
another camera.

I don't think we need
     anymore people jumping
in the library.

It wasn't too bad.
     It was kinda like Zelda
crossed with God of War.

Your shutter speed will
     vary so that you can get
proper exposures.

Then there's people like
     you who just want to shit all
over everyone.

It could also be
     the multicolored bike shorts
and orange tank top.

His thoughts vis a vis
     epistemology are
impressive as well.

Think the Christian Bale
     from American Psycho
without the chainsaw.

I started calling
     all adults by their first names
when I was thirteen.

Look in to his life
     after Star Trek and you'll see
why people like him.

[deleted] First thing
     that popped into my head when
i read the title.

Can anyone come
     home at lunchtime and take him
for a good long walk?

I had the guns, both
     kinds the rocks and hammers did
better lol.

Anyways, my pick
     is "Into the Blue Again"
by the Album Leaf.

So you consider
     yourself not Jewish because
you're an atheist?

But as traffic grew
     steadily, their existence
became imperiled.

I was living on
     their property, they can do
whatever they want.

In other words, food
     companies need to present
growth to investors.

Fascinating Who's
     Jim, and what was his choice? Sad,
but he speaks the truth.

[deleted] You too?
     Constipation is a bitch.
EDIT: Still no word.

And contributions
     to a certain field in no
way means you're able.

He told me it was
     too early to figure out
what was going on.

"A reasonable chance"
     is very poor odds as far
as l am concerned.

It burnt down. We had
     this really awesome old house
outside the village.

As for other parts,
     not quite so realistic
but a damned good romp.

Overall, this is
     my picture of what happens
(informed by your post).

I couldn't watch it.
     [deleted] Your boyfriend is
very proud of you.

They hit an iceberg
     and the only survivor
is that smelly whore.

Soaking once a day
     in an **epsom salt** bath can
provide some relief.

We were opening
     the bullets and extracting
the exploding stuff.

posted more! Awesome!
     Heh, I saw that entire
transaction coming.

Well unbeatable
     except that they're not actually
breaking any laws.

We basically don't
     care whether you speak English
or Swedish to us.

I've gotten a bit
     better but it still hits me
if I get turned down.

Then you walk around
     the back of the car and look
through the rear window.

Thanks! Wow, what a deep
     and insightful look into
some one else that is.

Furthermore, water
     bills are allocated based
on how much you use.

I have cash waiting.
     The future is late again.
Just ask them to stop.

(citation needed)
     I don't know where we get it.
Not my department.

Searching for Jazz is
     the same thing, only the song
isn't a Jazz song.

I'll bet you'll even
     be surprised at how much you
enjoy the country.

I've always wondered
     why we don't have rotating
valves on car engines.

Writers were only
     just exploring what it meant
to "tell" a story.

I enjoyed it though.
     Will probably do more with more
being shown. We'll see.

Once decided, there
     is no accounting of how
the money is spent.

His "dialog" is
     often just two monologues
running parallel.

It's supposed to be
     cold or room temp, I think, but
I prefer it warm.