Reddit Haikus

Not hide the warrant
     and wait for the next "bigger
crime" to come along.

I wasted a whole
     afternoon going through all
the levels again.

[deleted] Whether
     or not Jesus existed
isn't the issue.

I have never heard
     so many crazy and smart
things from the same place.

and when i do hook
     up with people, i rarely
have feelings for them.

If the answer is
     'yes', marry them and enjoy
your life together.

But it is much more
     commonly used to refer
to me near bar close.

The Devil made him
     do it. Yep, that's the answer.
Are you guys kidding?

His only warning
     is that that a lot of use
can cause addiction.

Careful, some people
     really hate those (like me, met
plenty of others).

I am interested
     in knowing if it really
is a crappy site?

or is this a cheap
     shot because you have nothing
else to bitch about?

Off to store to get
     some cold beers and sit outside
for an hour or so.

If I had to guess
     I would say the movement is
fairly Ah, all right.

i usually do
     alot of touring with big
bands and other bands.

When I decided
     to stop playing video
games and go outside.

Really, in the large
     scheme of things, how much time do
you spend having sex?

They even supply
     the rockets to idiots
willing to fire them.

You don't understand
     why Atheists create groups
and join together?

Until you get stuck
     in the door frame while walking
backwards and shooting.

Whether or not you
     are able to pay it is
another story.

Oh NO you did NOT
     just link me to your site while
I'm at work again.

Humiliation
     is such a small price to pay
for her transgressions!

No mechanical
     restraint a la hannibal
lector lol.

Let me do a text
     search of the material
in the library.

Please focus on costs
     for actual procedures, not
health insurance costs.

Those aren't the words or
     the actions of someone who
is really in love.

[deleted] And think
     about the people that can't
work or are retired.

I'm not sure if I'd
     actually say "are you sure you
want to marry her?

Women, in general,
     don't like their husbands to be
so subordinate.

Must suck when you're trying
     to schedule things so you can
watch multiple shows.

It's like... well it's like
     Disney got to him. This is
very good advice.

I guess I could bring
     some nuts or trail mix with nuts
and that would do it.

Happens all the time.
     You just don't like it happening
to Sarah Palin.

It's all too easy
     for people to request more
when they put in less.

Dude watch some of her
     other videos and see
how she treats the cops.

I only come here
     to see how people reason
about the world here.

NO. IDEA. WHO.
     THEY. WERE. WHAT. WERE. THEY. DOING.
IN. HER. PRIVATE. HOUSE?

The on this other
     the day saw, actually sad quite.
Do the great transect.

Is it just me or
     do the colors keep changing??
First orange now red?

Moreover, I don't
     categorize those beliefs
as *only* christian.

Ugh! You pacifists
     are willing to let them do
***ANYTHING*** they want.

Anything will do,
     necklaces and bracelets are
the best I would say.

Just drop this new guy
     now before things get awkward.
Don't lie to yourself.

This is the problem
     with most Christians. Disclaimer:
I am a Christian.

If they succeed, i'll
     buy an Apple appliance
(first time in my life).

It's like what happened
     with Chuck Norris, and we all
know how *that* turned out.

Do you have any
     idea what Germany
charges for collage?

If oral sex is
     like Diet Coke, then anal
sex is Mountain Dew.

I can only guess
     you're saving a few cents if
anything at all.

Happy now? I would
     have thought "the average person"
would have implied that.

As always, success
     depends on not going too
deeply into debt.

he goes on to talk
     about other movie shit
and just chats. it's cool.

Thanks for explaining
     Now it all makes so much sense
I still lack answers...

Back down. Where are you?
     You're on a boat... with The Man
Your Man Could Smell Like!

The type of event
     you are talking about here
would be game changing.

So the above is
     what I think could happen, but
I don't think it will.

But for someone who
     fundamentally can't swim,
that way lies madness.

It seems even more
     logical than the British
or "logical" style.

Crispin Glover who
     played Marty's dad, is younger
than Michael J. Fox.

And as such, the state
     can decide who can use them,
and how they are used.

How long did it take
     you to lost your weight and what
tips can you offer?

Can anyone else
     not see the post, and instead
sees just a blue line?

Damn, it's taking her
     long enough. [deleted] Cool.
Thanks! are brains kosher?

Older movies just
     felt as though you were looking
at some illusion.

The last third would be
     invested in various
stocks of my choosing.

Yeah the old man had
     nothing to do besides try
to fight with young folk.

That article was
     hard to read for some reason.
It just didn't flow well.

It would ask to be
     freed from a closed mind that keeps
our hearts enslaved, man.

You do that? How do
     you have fun being around
drunk people while high?

Maybe it's a band
     or a short story or his
fathers middle name.

I get it, the bitch
     be crazy but they probably
both got off lucky.

I wouldn't waste too
     much time on losers that aren't
going to make it.

Do this every day.
     There will come a morning when
you won't get back up.

Generally they were
     letters saying they'd received
my information.

With the evidence
     she caught on tape, the law seems
to be on her side.

I'm the farthest thing
     from a writer so that might
be a dumb question.

There's nothing i want
     to see more on bro style shirts
than the wearers blood.

The real reason is
     that now global warming can
travel back in time.

I waved to my wife
     and kid from the car window
as I left for work.

What you download is
     not the copyrighted part,
but what you view is.

In related news,
     I may never sit down on
the subway again.

Do you mean you can't
     stop drinking once you've started,
or just in general?

Whether it be dorm
     room, apartment, or even
house, we've all been there.

A nickel for some
     Icelandic hooch? I might buy
some since it's so cheap.

I'd think that it would
     be way better to know than
to sit wondering.

Technically the church
     now has representation
without taxation.

Haven't had to send
     you a single reminder.
You sir, are a King.

My question is, does
     he do this *all the time* or
just very often?

How is this funny?
     It doesn't matter. You won't
listen anyway.

I think so, Brain, but
     where is she going to get
that much mayonnaise?

Yes we are. For me,
     this is the most important
part of this new bill.

The hell that Ripley
     goes through in Aliens is
*very* personal.

Sure, but 'make it through'
     is metaphorical, just
like going through hell.

Also, once you get
     the ammo and medic packs,
USE them all the time.

and then i just left
     the room because arguments
like that go nowhere.

Love him or hate him
     (I hate him) he should be on
that list. And sink boats.

It's really easy
     to make her laugh, and then hard
to get her to stop.

All these things have been
     done by gay couples for years
now, without marriage.

See? I can make up
     bullshit and publish it on
the internet too.

Make sure to shower
     only every fourth day or
so, just to be safe.

Why do you believe
     you have the right to impose
your will on others?

I'd say the water
     is the most important thing,
but the toast won't hurt.

It's a real question.
     You think it's unrealistic
to be athletic?

Isn't getting some
     rights and some progress better
than nothing at all?

The next time I talked
     to him, I said, "dad, I just
read this article.

It explains nothing.
     It's like a cop saying 'it's
the law. I should know.

Successful women
     are smarter and have many
invaluable skills.

It may very well
     be true unless your ship is
really together.

You should ask her out.
     You would have a nice story
to tell your children.

After another
     hundred yards or so, it stopped
and looked back again.

And the funny thing
     is that the second "dip" has
already started.

I could just rip you
     to shreds, but I will just point
out some statistics.

I will literally
     escort him around England,
dressed as a wizard.

But, that is for rats
     and my math or sources may
very well be wrong.

Ditch the sleeping bag.
     Bulky and heavy and you
probably won't need it.

If *The Norwegian*
     called, I'm not sure I'd know how
to answer either.

Have you ever had
     any particularly
unusual requests?

Challenge your morals.
     Inspect your philosophies.
Add to the future.

Get educated
     on the topic before you
rant about it, please.

It's a wall my mind
     refuses to climb over.
I'm typing from it.

People will still seek
     to add value that cannot
be duplicated.

I smell bestseller!
     I thought that too. There was no
face in that photo.

Challenge your morals.
     Inspect your philosophies.
Add to the future.

I haven't tried their
     products yet, but it sounds like
what you're looking for.

Let's at least give them
     some benefit of the doubt.
Is that your pet snake?

It was a great way
     to be productive while you're
looking for a group.

She came home with him
     and stayed with us for a week
in a safe compound.

One thing that really
     bothers me is when adults
call the cops on kids.

Also, people latch
     onto top voted comments
so they can be seen.

I don't care if they're
     buying drugs or equipment,
it's wrong either way.

Underneath comment
     karma, there's a little link
which says send message.

If either of us
     is being obtuse, it is
you, chum. I haven't.

Singapore: less weird
     than you think No, I think you
misunderstood me.

We don't really hang
     out or anything, but we've
had conversations.

Teddy Roosevelt
     actually succeeded though it's
been a hundred years.

Or a complete bitch.
     Wasn't he being an nice
guy to begin with?

That same example
     applies to 3D, some games just
look cooler in 3D.

I guess another
     question is who cares if it's
only a "gimmick"?

It's cool. Some games look
     cooler, even if they work
just fine without 3D.

Okay so 'perfect
     sense' is not the best phrase but
there was some sense there.

I don't think I can
     explain it any simpler,
so I won't try to.

After living here
     for a few months, I started
speaking really well.

Do you advertise?
     How many hours would you work
per week, on average?

He has a hard time
     finding women that don't freak
out over his size.

You'd need an all out
     public uprising to change
any of this shit.

Bullshit. There has not
     been a single clinical
study proving this.

Not at all. Just go
     ahead, I won't be looking.
No way. Thanks for that.

They wanted things done
     fast and cheaper, which in turn
makes it dangerous.

Faye, so hot... She'd be
     more attractive if it weren't
for all the comics.

can't we distinguish
     between relevant debate
and rival drivel?

I smile, then lay down.
     A minute later, both ham
and feline were gone.

He'll know what to do.
     Good luck! I'll have them, and then
keep them. That's fair, right?

[deleted] Great point!
     It's really important not
to mix those two up.

That's just something I've
     heard, don't know why or by whom
in particular...

Really high volume
     in the hope that at least one
will be successful.

Don't get a full fledged
     "power adapter" unless
you really need it.

mariah carey
     Which baby? The thirteen year
old one? Ah, fuck it!

Cool. this isn't where
     I parked my car. Or any
prison sentences.

I'm always talking
     about Washington's farewell
address to people.

It is the 10th
     biggest city in the US
for crying out loud.

My girlfriend buys fresh
     groceries and cooks most of her
own meals and spends ~$100/week.

One of the best lead
     off tracks to any album
I have ever heard.

Excuse me, it's time
     for me to count my money,
which used to be hers.

Try that with REAL wheat
     bread and you would probably end
up breaking your hand.

I wanted to see
     Australia put up a fight
against Germany.

Whether or not he'd
     take you to court for it is
another story.

The characters can
     be really expressive when
you want them to be.

No, but they were on
     the finish line, where they got
by their appearance.

What kind of sugar?
     Temp? rise time? any other
special instructions?

If you kill someone
     with premeditation, that's
first degree murder.

**Warning:** You will *still*
     crash into depression from
this kind of approach.

Also, your tangent
     about anal has nothing
to do with facials.

I'm guessing you just
     started paying attention.
He has a good point.

Why are there three or
     four different reasons given
for why Jesus died?

[deleted] Clearly,
     the Move never had a chance
with people like you.

No need to protest
     I merely had to say na
lets not and we didn't.

That's the one! I don't
     remember the praise Jesus
part but I'll take it.

Fun fact: the awesome
     new swedish metro cars are
made by Bombardier.

I believe it is
     quoting Supreme Court cases
without citation.

My advice would be
     keep trying shit until something
just blows you away.

You're floating in space
     next to the shuttle, and you
need to get to it.

I wouldn't really
     trust failure rate to improve
unless I see it.

But really, paying
     for the top brand just isn't
worth it with Vodka.

god damn, that would be
     pretty sweet if she were filmed
taking hits of meth.

After the way North
     played against Brasil today,
I will root for them!

This is important
     since the exchange rate for CAN
vs Real is 1.7...ouch.

Yes, those things can be
     done in many places, but
this is where we are.

Having an awesome
     yet reachable goal to work
towards makes me happy.

But I loved it there
     as a kid, and when I go
back it's always fun.

This is what I wrote
     as my comment on this game.
Simply amazing.

anybody else
     hear that in your head when you
open the picture?

If you need to take
     more pictures to get better
results, then do that.

*Ratings disabled*
     *comments require approval*
Can't say I'm surprised.

I mean, it was well
     done, but why it was done I'm
not too sure about.

When a person can't
     make sense of something it is
deemed "illogical".

This is my biggest
     complaint with action movies
and how they treat guns.

We never emailed
     anyone ever again
if they unsubscribed.

Are you kidding me?
     Conservative radio
is broadcast on AM.

I suggest you take
     the public transportation
city bus instead.

Interesting. I thought
     the Source engine runs pretty
much or anything.