Reddit Haikus

We may have to go
     to war if Russia invades
another country.

Still sad as hell though.
     And BOOM! The worst thing that could
happen to Palin?

He made his statements
     with confidence, did not budge
when questioned further.

[deleted] You've got
     to remember that these are
just simple farmers.

Well, if you don't like
     Venezuelan oil, you may
be in for a treat!

So for anyone
     just starting to program I'd
recommend a Mac.

[deleted] You're right
     about the "Car of Today"
as they call it now.

I was fortunate
     that it was not a very
fast growing version.

[deleted] BULLSHIT
     SPIN ON WORDS. SHE WAS TALKING
IN TERMS OF NATO.

Nobody else could
     ever afford to exploit
the infrastructure.

You mean my Billy
     Mays life insurance isn't
going to cut it?

Some weeks I would save
     money and have a little
extra cash on me.

Don't be a hero.
     Just read your presentation
Why is this BREAKING!!!

Voters need to know
     that there aren't only two names
on the ballot. Wow.

Call the Care Police
     Quick! thank you for a truly
laugh out loud moment.

Then we have Humphrey
     who had and Johnson who had
and Nixon who had.

[deleted] How hard
     is it to do a quick search
before you submit?

We played Playstation
     with one of the local kids
at his nearby house.

One time I actually
     slipped on a banana peel
and fell on my ass.

Satire is not
     satire unless it has
some truth behind it.

He's upset because
     he DID kill kids and he feels
like a pile of shit.

Intentional or
     not, it just seems like a big
publicity stunt.

However, I am
     talking about preventing
wars, and a draft would.

I'm making travel
     plans to go to Newcastle.
The eyes compel me.

*any* bank would fail
     if depositors lined up
to withdraw their funds.

Just because we can
     be trained out of it doesn't
mean it's a good thing.

This is exactly
     what I thought the article
was about. Pirates!

It is a very
     simple concept and not too
hard to reason out.

I bet this person
     only wants to protect cute
endangered species.

not sure which one seems
     to be in better shape right
now to be honest.

Thank you, it always
     helps to have a vague concept
locked down and defined.

[deleted] Those damn
     Norwegian Regulators
and their beef with trains.

They also don't track
     their comments or think about
what they are posting.

I predict a huge
     upswing in Green support if
she doesn't tank them.

The only way you
     can win the media game
is by not playing.

"Creationism"
     will run its course either way.
[deleted] Ballet?

Do you really think
     that the pigs do care about
how they are perceived???

If a person has
     no back problems, seating is
nothing but preference.

I love the music
     at the end during the brawl.
internal fluff piece.

I agree with his
     column, but only because
I'm partisan too.

Is it just me, or
     is this kinda depressing?
The story, I mean.

On top is better
     than under the covers, but
hair gets everywhere.

*That's* the Apple Tax,
     not a slight price difference on
comparable laptops.

I'll take the centrist,
     and I hope others will too.
I saw this last night.

The greater of two
     evils wishes to thank you
for your indifference.

But he's done good things
     for many many people
in Venezuela.

It took a few lines
     for anyone to spot it.
When they did, they laughed.

With Biden on board,
     the Democrats are still 3/4ths white.
It's about nothing.

So you're saying if
     Israel wants true peace it should
stop being Israel?

Diggers? not as much.
     At least I never did when
I was over there.

We've got a whole new
     brand of Christian freaks coming
into the White House.

I met him once too.
     For lack of a better word
he's a crazy guy.

You usually drink
     Mt. Dew, but you think you'll give
the new thing a try.

Or they could destroy
     the indigenous life on
another planet.

Romney, were it not
     for religion would have been
rejected outright.

First of all, I didn't
     say watch the Kingdom, I said
watch the opening.

[deleted] Trust me.
     Oil analysts have no place
here on this website.

Period. If you're
     not using a slow cooker,
you're doing it wrong.

and the "OMG
     PALIN IS A ZOMBIE!!!" or
"MCCAIN EATS BABIES!!!"

[deleted] You could
     also try to exercise
your eyes. Does it work?

I don't stop there though,
     then I start growling at him
and trying to fight him.

He was politically
     very astute in knowing
how to win campaigns.

I'm just saying, if
     you have an opinion, *do
something about it.

I'd watch that on loop.
     That's sarcasm? Really. Wow.
Thanks for the heads up.

A: Wat. Q: I said,
     what's your first name? A: Wat! Q:
Damn it, what's your name?

It also probably
     depends a lot on your rank
in the company.

We don't need fox news
     to make our politicians
look ridiculous.

The arrows really
     are switched... Not when he's censored!
I agree with you.

Cut her some slack, all
     she really wants is World Peace
and a tiara.

Direct discussions
     with people in England who
have first hand knowledge.

What disgusts me is
     that this reporter is seen
as something special.

I can't see Dubai
     making it over the long
run as oil runs out.

Too many fucking
     people and not enough jobs
with this recession.

Where's it from? Awesome.
     Republicans are lying
liars who tell lies.

"I realize you are
     on fire, sir, but we do not
have public restrooms"..

At least you'll get them
     to think about it, even
if it may not work.

In Russian things sound
     exactly how they're written
letter by letter.

Christ, they can't even
     keep riots from breaking out
at soccer matches.

Bit perfect copy.
     Best laugh I had in a week.
Sad it's being pulled.

I just have a cool
     image that I think others
would appreciate.

I agree with you
     to an extent but you talk
statutory rape?

Most of my female
     friends also don't sleep as well
as their male partners.

But I thought this guy
     did a relatively good
job at doing that.

Money can buy you
     everything but you will end
up with nothing. No.

that candy corn rant
     was priceless Make better posts
and you'll get more mail!

That means the icon
     checks when you have messages
at page loads only.

its awesome to see
     he isn't getting softball
questions anymore.

Lines out in the streets
     here in North Carolina,
starting to ration!

Keep it up, skippy.
     People are pretty low on
sense these days, alas.

[deleted] Spam spam
     spam spam spam, etc.
I gotta agree.

Who builds all the planes,
     missiles, and jet engines? Yes.
It's impossible.

Americans don't
     have any money in their
pockets, they have debt.

It's because they are
     detached from reality
and not very bright.

Well, here are some tips,
     advice, and information
to get you going...

But consider here
     that according to the link,
CNN didn't lie.

Exactly, this is
     probably the best thing that could
have happened to him.

As sad as it is,
     that's how seniority is
usually setup.

The stupid people
     keep the rescuers employed.
what's wrong with her leg?

I think Obama
     should save his attacks for more
pertinent subjects.

I think there's more than
     few WoW players are going
to end up switching.

You're a tool. Have you
     ever heard of something called
the social contract?

Does it not? OK,
     let's not even dignify
that with a response.

This isn't even
     about charging them for their
medical treatment.

wait, you're telling me
     Obama is a finely
woven fabric? What?

Like the article
     said, this is nothing new. Stay.
It'll make no difference.

We will never know
     how horribly unlikely
my life would have been.

If people wanted
     truth we'd all be ascetic
atheist scientists.

Bring on the Debates.
     Your definition of "squat"
is different than mine.

Wasn't that blown on
     asbestos that was blasted
loose by the impact?

It wasn't that good.
     It made very little sense.
It was annoying.

[deleted] It does
     raise some issues about both
McCain and Palin.

I flatly denied
     that my views have anything
to do with that film.

I know all about
     Ramtha and her absurd claims
and her fake accent.

The universe was
     made to deal with this. wat No!
Mr. Squishy pants!

McCain supporting
     pedophiles everywhere are
outraged at this ad!

So the effect is
     the same, regardless of what
you choose to call it.

For better or worse,
     I hope he lets us know how
that worked out for him.

Willfully ignore
     what you don't want to be true?
Bury the research?

So you thought they sipped
     tea and massaged each others
balls during a coup?

If only we could
     get anonymous to go
after John McCain.

Almost exactly
     two months. Aperture Science:
We do what we must.

I don't piss about
     with your AD domain, so don't
touch my firewall rules.

Do you switch, or do
     you do the dirty with what
you've already seen?

People at CERN don't
     want to mess with them, they just
want to keep them out.

I heard that a lot,
     there, about how you can't get
out of the Valley.

does government get
     paid more if take dangerous
drivers off the road?

Come back when you want
     to actually discuss the point
being made. Ok.

Deaf and dumb? That's not
     why I mentioned his Ivy
League education.

Why can't you just love
     people all the time despite
anything they do?

Found out last month, on
     medicine now, and wow, huge
difference in my life.

[You've obviously
     never been caught spray painting
You Suck Canada!

I wasn't really
     impressed with the video
but I liked the song.

Wisdom for College
     Freshman: GET OFF THE FUCKING
COMPUTER RIGHT NOW.

But I do believe
     we have an obligation
to our fellow man.

I could never reach.
     Sometimes shit floats to the top.
Big Brother Fail. Nope.

God bless Obama!
     [deleted] I read it wrong.
Sorry about that.

That's my bet. I don't
     think that's really the source code
for Windows Vista.

It's might not solve his
     problems but I'm sure it will
make him feel better.

You know that saying,
     "The grass is always greener
on the other side."?

If standards worked they'd
     both be scoring the same but
the fact is they aren't.

I've gotta tell her
     to take a picture of that.
That's just plain insane.

This is what you get
     when you buy Apple products.
Sorry, but it's true.

It's a tornado
     proof house. What will they of next....
Are you serious?

And that's the key folks.
     Men need to get some action
before a big test.

God is taken on
     faith, not proof, and any proofs
are simply stupid.

Obviously you're
     welcome to participate
in conversation.

Let me be the first
     to say I don't give a rat's
ass what that man says.

Scientology
     is a small religion not
worth anyone's time.

Because legal rights
     and moral rights are often
not in alignment.

This final loose end
     has to be cleaned up before
Mr. Bush leaves town.

she might want to ditch
     the whore makeup kit if she's
reaching for that goal.

I say this as one
     who condemns the circus act
that is CNN.

However, she goes
     above and beyond that just
about every time.

Citation needed
     for all of your conclusions
too then smarty pants.

Programming a game
     or something with this would be
quite fun and easy.

Yeah, I know this is
     going toward a little thing
called World Government.

However, she goes
     above and beyond that just
about every time.

The public body
     is a contract between one
large group of people.

I'll take the person
     who doesn't flat out deny
reality, thanks.

3-Visiting wholesale
     death upon innocents is
clearly genocide.

How long will China
     keep paying for less and less
return on their loans?

Ask your grandparents
     what THEY did when a kid broke
their arm or something.

I shudder to think
     what would happen if I was
on that hunting trip.

How is that reason
     when you still haven't even
figured that out yet?

I'm not a BAD GUY!
     I HATE CNN! I'll watch
Fox News from now on".

Zing indeed. I didn't
     believe people here are *that*
devoid of context.

I agree this is
     wrong, but to be fair, the guy
didn't 'buy' the app store.

They don't 'defy' our
     notions of architecture
and physics at all.

How does that ever
     come into conversation
in an election?

You do know we are
     totally screwed if Chavez
turns off the oil taps.

Sean Hannity duh!
     He's next! [deleted] Thank you,
but it was nothing.

You couldn't actually
     recommend that anyone
watch Paycheck, surely.

Mississippi is
     pretty much the scariest
state in the union.

No, nor would I be
     willing to shine a laser
in my eye. Your point?

So the press can go
     RIGHT BACK to giving McCain
air time for his ads?

Get over yourself.
     I think McCain and Palin
should take this exam.

But that said, Palin
     helps the Republicans play
that game really well.

I support hunting
     more than I do what happens
in factory farms.

This is what votes are
     for, because NOBODY is
right for everyone.

(One of the cases
     where I'm actually glad I did
not find anything).

You have correctly
     identified the joke. wait...
where's Michael Jackson?

I liked the english
     guy dissecting the food while
making enemies.

They should base the search
     tool on the state. I like it.
It's intelligent.

And if the odd fake
     reviews slips by, it's won't harm
their business model.

Forgot what it was.
     Will reply to my post if
I remember that.

This was turning out
     to be one of the weakest
elections in years.

This is laughable.
     Mccain has no chance. There is
no horse race people.

FOR FREE! [deleted]
     [deleted] Because Mccain
has no real support.

/sarcasm It has
     nothing to do with stopping
suicide bombers?

this is what happens
     when its all work and no play.
[deleted] Amen!

You speak of the three
     countries, you mean the so called
axis of evil.

Not only cheap, but
     also shockingly easy
to make! Worth trying these.

I think that maybe
     if I ask you guys, it might
jog my memory.

But, had there been no
     suicide bombings, there would
have been no checkpoints.

Most likely it would
     be murder or manslaughter.
I tell you what though.

It will only catch
     on if people start going
out and doing it.

do as many bong
     hits and keg stands as you can
while you have the time.

It has everything
     to do with mutual love
and dedication.

If so, then this is
     ridiculous, otherwise
the law has spoken.

The debate must be
     conducted and then it all
concerned have their say.

The problem is not
     lack of taxation it is
excessive spending.