Reddit Haikus

The rich avoid most
     taxes anyway, so why
worry about them?

In my personal
     experience, everything
is going quite well.

Hell, if you think you
     can survive the horrors on
the way, best of luck.

[deleted] People
     on the phone are far away.
What do you expect?

Obviously you
     know nothing about what our
alternative was.

Not when he isn't
     near a teleprompter. Clean?
Joe Biden says so.

What you need to do
     is overwrite everything
that used to be there.

Bush and McCain find
     that quite entertaining. This...
could get interesting.

It's a decision
     I have made. And money is
out there to be made.

Some people use graham
     crackers instead of bread, but
I prefer the bread.

Looks like your only
     correspondence is someone
flaming your dumb ass.

It is what happens
     when you have rational players
acting rationally.

If I remember
     correctly it went away
in a couple days.

[deleted] Both will
     probably draft, but with McCain
is a surety.

The worst of the worst
     need no denunciations
by the likes of me.

i know this is late
     in coming, but maybe you
should have moved to france.

I think the light source
     is at the bottom right not
top left. Chrome is great.

Private members are
     perfectly accessible
by public functions.

[deleted] I asked
     the same question and you can
get some answers [**here.

There is another
     theory which states that this has
already happened.

Well, I said yeah sure,
     but what I meant was yes sir.
So you are ok?

She is a woman.
     Thanks. Car chases, explosions,
and groovy soundtracks!!

Man I don't need drugs
     to enjoy that article,
just to enhance it.

Plenty of women
     enjoy sex in a very,
very active way.

Please show me im wrong.
     [deleted] Actually, he seems
to like it a lot.

[deleted] There's no
     gringo answer to Clarkson.
They all be sellouts.

laughed until i cried.
     Holy shit. I never knew
that about myself.

[deleted] I don't
     look at the keyboard either.
But I don't touch type.

What is in place *is*,
     in fact, a deal that has been
struck for a pipeline.

Most Americans
     are *not* upper middle class.
Your parents are wise.

What a serious
     amount of political
bigotry that is.

Either that or you
     understand them but ignore
their validity.

Do you think people
     turn to faith simply because
life is difficult?

Who ever said that?
     No one thinks Obama is
the second coming.

For some reason I'd
     like to see this with a John
Madden play by play.

Mocking them isn't
     going to trigger the need
to become rational.

It turns out that just
     about everything Palin
has said is a lie.

My vote already
     doesn't count, because I don't
live in a swing state.

If someone would like
     to step up, we will make them
the moderator.

[deleted] To be
     fair, I invited him there.
I just think he sucks.

She kept campaigning
     for months after Obama
had already won.

This internal war
     hurt the democrats and helped
the republicans.

What's it matter if
     you hook up the positive
or negative first?

Perhaps you noticed
     the "following the guy through
time" thing in reviews?

That seems like more work
     to clean than a frying pan.
Or a baking sheet.

If people don't like
     the price then they should refuse
to use the service.

Teach them not to click
     on every damn thing they see
on the Internet.

This is a really
     stupid ignorant lying
misleading statement.

[deleted] Except
     for how massively blown out
portions of it are.

You may even find
     that the candidates are not
exactly the same.

EDIT: I would like
     to see something hit the moon.
That would be a trip.

But that doesn't mean
     shark was necessarily
invented first... Thanks.

that's what I have been
     trying to tell you honey, but
you just won't listen.

[deleted] It's all
     part of the self obsession
that plagues teens today.

The title "czar" sounds
     we are taking Positive!
Decisive! Action!

Well that's news to me,
     and apparently other
commenters as well.

Yeah, most of us are
     very unlikely to get
shot down and tortured.

How often do you
     think you get the call "Hey, um...
Large Animal Doc...

I'm betting the mom
     probably also works there too.
It's hilarious.

Mocking them isn't
     going to trigger the need
to become rational.

Most impressive. *When
     I drill* *I don't spill* *even
if she's on the pill.

Mail, public schools, roads???
     I can't think of many things
government does well.

They should have just laid
     down and let the Nazis do
whatever they please!

If you're not going
     to be imprisoned or killed,
you're not being forced.

I know which option
     I choose, and the choice I make
is the most rational.

But seriously,
     who are "they" that "multiply",
causing more "suffering"?

Morally, it shows
     that I am willing to vote
for the right person.

When pressed, the only
     explanation he has is
"that's what I believe".

If Ron Paul had ran
     third party, I'd still be out
campaigning for him.

Command & Conquer?
     Thanks for that, but I don't think
that is "the" story.

While I disagreed
     with you often, the world needs
someone like you still.

[deleted] Are you
     suggesting nothing is bad
until it is banned?

are all weak sisters
     compared to what you can do
with your back muscles.

It is not as good
     to show that something does not
exist or occur.

Because if we don't
     remember history we are
doomed to repeat it.

The program text is
     probably more important than
what it compiles to.

[deleted] he has
     at least one golf hole on his
estate if not more.

The wife's drug issues,
     unless "that old sack of shit"
is involved, should not.

That's what he's hoping
     you'll do, and what he thinks will
make the most impact.

If he really did
     request this, then I would want
to hear it. how? why?

They want an enforced
     legal system based on their
religious tenets.

So liberals have been
     spreading "global warming" lies
for millions of years?

It took a while, but
     I definitely learned what
I was trying to learn.

I have the chronic
     and it helps with the back pain.
Well, it's not Unix...

This is related
     to the point above about
the cost of entry.

Strangely the roommate
     isn't even from the south
he's from New England.

I knew boiled peanuts
     were popular down south but
peanuts and cola?

Actually, I think it's
     kind of disgusting that you
find that appealing.

Obama voted
     with the democrats, so what?
It's a fact, it's true.

Can't they just let me
     spend my money however
the fuck I want? Damn.

Unless someone tells
     you they are paying something
you best bet they aren't.

Any competent
     sex education program
teaches abstinence.

[deleted] I think
     this was actually the best way
to go about it.

McCain's approach is
     essentially the polar
opposite of Ron Paul's.

What caused the collapse?
     [Citation Needed] This is
not breaking news. Fools!

He'd just turn some loaves
     into fishes and bust out
his samurai sword.

If you can do that,
     you have to figure out how
to get enough air.

What's taking so long?
     Do you need to take your kid
to the baby doc?

Or doing what one
     should do in this instance, PAY
A PROFESSIONAL!

Fascinating stuff.
     [deleted] So the Saudis
are not mobster types?

I know people who
     cross the border for shopping
because it's cheaper.

Why not sit around
     insulting trees for being
shorter than you are?

Extra medium?
     Hopefully America
realizes that too.

And we could prevent
     heading into a cold war
pretty easily.

Take this shit elsewhere,
     write it on your toilet wall
where someone might care.

If they are chanting
     at someone they disagree
with, it's protesting.

It's good that *Real World
     Haskell* is taking a more
pragmatic approach.

Did Steve tell you that?
     What kind of physicist name
is Steve, anyway?

This post is being
     down voted because people
don't know their history.

If you think voting
     will change anything then you
deserve ridicule.

Most companies out
     there aren't doing terribly
well through ads alone.

Nor is stealing stop
     signs tantamount to causing
traffic accidents.

Links? Believe it or
     not, some people actually like
the boring details.

There are so many
     tools that help you plot out good
investments these days...

First Person Shooters
     are well known to be shallow,
linear affairs.

The only games worth
     playing were available
on other systems.

god good, could he cram
     any more annotations
in that video?

If they chose peace then
     you can claim you have achieved
the impossible.

now that cable lock,
     on the other hand, should be
the point of focus.

Not that I'm calling
     you a liar, perhaps you
have a time machine?

It would be a lot
     cheaper to just breed the ones
already captive.

Instead, it's pretty
     far up there in the insane
category, eh?

He was singing _The
     Girl I Almost Married_, three
songs into the set.

If you can't answer
     "yes" to that, then you don't want
Georgia in NATO.

Jenny eat something.
     Much better than the first, Gates
dancing was funny.

[deleted] They fear
     death because they have to deal
with me afterwards.

And they made the choice
     to stay there for a decade
rather than pull out.

I explicitly
     agreed that, ultimately,
all empires fall.

The monetary
     policy alone cannot
prop up a market.

I've babysat drunk
     kids far more than anyone
has babysat me.

Are you more likely
     to buy Vista now than you
were before watching?

You can lose an eye
     that way if you're not wearing
the right safety gear.

Since I, too, could see
     Russia, maybe *I* should run
for national office.

It was the friend who
     was planning on a spa day
for her own birthday.

Makes me wonder, what
     would a nuclear meltdown
on the moon look like?

Let's see if McCain
     the maverick has half the stones
that Obama has.

Anyway, you've got
     to stop listening to Harper's
rhetoric on this.

To be clear, it's bond
     investors whose recklessness
we're encouraging.

Jesus. The dinner
     scene was funny but the rest
was a disaster.

Russia has enough
     nuclear weapons to kill
everyone on Earth.

Walked into the first
     bar I saw. Ordered a beer.
Sat down with the beer.

Americans are
     about to grow balls as big
as some of these guys.

But I totally
     agree that the Democrats
should be doing this.

Very much. Good luck
     defining what 'optimal
circumstances' are.

Not to be too flip,
     but sometimes I think these guys
just need to get laid.

However, it was
     pretty funny and they seem
to have chemistry.

His ass is going
     to die of old age before
we ever see him.

No, I am saying
     that they should have thought further
ahead than they did.

this ad is a wild
     success by almost any
marketers measure.

What is wrong with some
     sort of coordination
in this area?

They had some pretty
     nifty digital image
processing back then.

watch mad men or work
     in advertising if you're
really interested.

But it's only cool
     if you're sad about stuff all
the time. Hey.. I laughed.

seriously, how
     long would they expect that thing
to last over there?

When did it become
     nationalized, did miss something?
What concentration?

Good work, detective.
     Just because its reported,
doesn't make that true.

It's the best response
     to my statement that even
I could come up with.

but does microsoft
     really need to improve their
brand recognition?

M: Look, I CAME HERE
     FOR AN ARGUMENT, I'm not
going to just stand...!!

He would just stare her
     down or just laugh in her face.
[deleted] oh shit...

Need to hold off on
     having that baby until
you're more mature? Nope.

The hard questions don't
     have answers, how do you think
he should have played it?

HOT SWEATY ARAB
     MEN THAT KNOW WHAT THEY'RE DOING
WITH THEIR *MASSIVE* TOOLS.

I can only hope
     the tech czar works out as well
as the drug czar has.

I didn't think about
     Microsoft. I thought about
Seinfeld and Bill Gates.

That means those guys are
     Solid Snakes and not Conan
the Barbarians.

Yes, You have become
     the laughing stock from London
to Siberia.

Birth control doesn't
     kill anyone either though,
so what's the difference?

And I want to know
     what the hell this camera is
going to be like!

I feel like I came
     out of this a very strong
person mentally.

I loved her always,
     She didn't know. I tried patience,
Let a glacier grow.

Sarah Palin should
     disqualify John McCain.
That's how bad she is.

The hospitals give
     their bills to the government
who pays for the bills.

But she will help him
     win votes in November. Sad.
Yep, but it's a spike.

Have been for decades.
     If it didn't work, no one would
spend money on it.

I'm not sure what you
     mean here, but it is between
you and your Maker.

For many of you,
     this will be much less breeding.
For me, much, much more.

Also, don't forget
     that McCain campaign got $1M
from Georgian lobby.

It is not going
     to happen this November
at the ballot box.

That happened to you?
     "It's light, it's democracy..."
"They can't shut that down."

From that point of view
     the Washington Post doesn't
matter anyway.

Gibson: What do you
     think about the Bush doctrine?
Palin: Doctoring?

[deleted] Alright
     sorry for the delay, here
is the video.

People always go
     for what they know, or at least,
what they *think* they know.

Well, there goes any
     excuse I have for feeling
sorry for myself.

You can also look
     at the connectivity
graph of friend lists too.

Someone is gonna
     lose their balls when I find out
who's responsible.

I guess that means I'll
     have to vote for Obama
instead of McCain.

It would be so much
     easier if everyone
just agreed with me.

Well put, especially
     the Common Ground argument.
You're doing it wrong!

We saw her shaky
     interview and I expect
only more to come.

because he's worn out
     from screwing the girl that fucks
properly no doubt.

What exactly do
     you find missing? No worries.
I'll decide for us.

I hear starcraft is
     mandated in n korea.
Okay that makes sense.

Rhyme is all very
     well, but as your next trick, please
try and make it scan.

a community
     organizer, let's elect
the guy president!

[deleted] They should,
     F1 is the premier racing
circuit in the world.

A fine idea
     on the way to bankruptcies
in all governments.

Nothing threatened us
     (but the difficulty was
"Easy" on this game).

That's ultimately
     the only thing that could save
human kind (for real).

We may have to go
     to war if Russia invades
another country.