Reddit Haikus

Worst weather we've had
     since I got here (only two
months ago, but still).

That's hilarious!
     [deleted] The best pros make
this kind of errors.

[deleted] Classic
     example of "It's your mind
that makes it dirty".

I agree. Its not
     believable that the thought
didn't occur to her.

[deleted] [removed]
     [removed] wow this sucks I love
the new world order!

They were savages,
     we were told, and couldn't be
trusted with freedom.

Feel something other
     than starvation once and you
start putting on weight.

After a certain
     point, I don't think it matters
to them anymore.

So I'm guessing yes,
     those were Israelis shooting
warning shots at him.

Apparently, white
     nationalist propaganda
is not that button.

Maybe the kids from
     wealthier homes just don't like
marshmallows as much.

[removed] Well, you need
     to go there to understand
how deep you are in!

I believe that God
     knows each person's heart, and can
judge accordingly.

I can't wait until
     I get to shoot somebody!
It gets me so hot!

:p This is funny.
     Wonder if anyone would
really do this though.

in order to get
     back to the critical path
and higher profits.

that is surprising.
     I thought that going out more
would lead to less sleep.

I tend to agree,
     though I don't think programs like
that have "no effect".

I think they made some
     assumptions, which may not be
accurate, really.

And learning geared towards
     their natural inclinations
was more successful.

[deleted] If you
     have a flat roof, cool it off
with a soaker hose.

Are you reminded
     that you are a man every
time you go to work?

I have a theory
     but I think it's obvious
what my theory is.

Now, my friend David
     took his mother's gold teeth out
while she was sleeping.

and then sticks around
     and essentially prevents
the conversation.

None of this is true.
     Drugs are bad for you. They fry
your brain, like an egg.

Probably building fires
     for cooking. The punishment?
Their car was destroyed.

And of course this is
     precisely what restrictive
zoning amounts to.

I don't know if one
     can say there is a scaling
model for Python.

Poorly. But I'm not
     sure it was primarily
his job to do that.

killing children is
     apparently only wrong
when israel does it.

It is possible
     to jam it all in a jar,
with a manifest.

We've been using our
     foreign policy to keep
prices low for years.

If you disable
     your javascript it will let
you pass every time.

It doesn't improve
     the situation to do
what they are doing.

I'm sure your approach
     would lead to lots of happy
relationships, too.

I've heard that gays want
     to adopt so that they can
molest their children.

It's happening the same
     to Python in its attempt
to take over Perl.

Now the market has
     learned, and reality is
catching up with them.

The more Bush loses
     ground, the more rabid his weird
support base will get.

It has admirable
     intentions, but nothing is
ever that simple.

But I must admit
     I agree that the Beastie
Boys do, in fact, suck.

He's talking about
     keeping perl as a mainstream
computing language.

I believe this is
     related to the "morning
wood" phenomenon.

When he was sitting
     in the classroom others where
thinking what to do.

Um, no offense, but
     I have no idea what
that post is saying.

[deleted] You're right,
     it had been a long time since
I was a Perl fan.

The article does
     actually have bits of a phone
interview with him.

That's from one of those
     large "How to Draw Cartoons" books.
I've got it somewhere.

I always knew you
     were crazy, but now I see
your nuts. OMG.

[deleted] I am
     not suggesting a solely
suburban model.

Have someone there who
     is not tripping to make sure
you don't harm yourself.

Your economics
     imagination isn't
quite fertile either.

They have set a date
     for getting independence
from hydrocarbons.

So far they have stopped
     two suicide bombings (I'll
try and find a link).

Isn't it like pig?
     (not that I would try either.)
I would eat it too.

People ROUTINELY
     choose to fight wars rather than
change their way of life!

It kind of makes you
     think that maybe he (Bush) is
human after all.

I think your supposed
     to sign up before you can
post your location.

The last paragraph
     is useless and most likely
wrong speculation.

You just enter drug
     name and it reports where you
can buy it for sure.

You have every right
     to ignore issues that you
deem unimportant.

Good Lord some of you
     people are dumber than rocks.
He's making a point.

Too bad destroying
     american currency
is a federal crime.

It is no wonder
     that many Americans
are thinking the worse.

There are many ways
     to skin the "alternative
syntax for Lisp" cat.

I guess this dude hates
     word processors in general
and prefers plain text.

They hit the "send now"
     button without providing
their actual message.

Also, it's easy
     to see a conspiracy
where there isn't one.

Trust but verify
     falls apart if you won't go
and verify it.

You already stole
     the idea of changing
the logo around.

Even Apple's Mail
     filter, which isn't very
good, performs better.

Did anyone first
     see this domain as 'Nothing
Israel' and say... phew?

I wonder why there's
     white smoke immediately
after the black smoke.

I thought you were trying
     to say that invoices didn't
need their own table.

You are a liar.
     That doesn't even vaguely
enter the debate.

Let the hospitals,
     drug companies, and other
investors do that.

That's cool, I only
     responded because the Big
Island is my home.

[deleted] When you
     lower standards and inflate
scores, where does it end?

I enjoyed Christine
     very much and Salem's lot
didn't disappoint me.

The implication
     is an inherent bias
in the test itself.

You should be able
     to make mony while sleeping...
Where's Led Zeppelin?

Bush is letting his
     hair down more and more as his
final term wears on.

Remove anything
     client specific, specially
conditional stuff.

and why not Voted
     down because of the crappy
ordering system.

The engine had no
     power and could move the car
about 15mph.

Iraq is one small,
     albeit faltering, step
in that direction.

That is completely
     nuts, and it is the reason
to have two resumes.

Bonus: not having
     to worry about the state
messing up funding.

Dare to Dream: what would
     the world be like if there had
been no Jews at all?

Then again, I could
     be projecting my own views
onto his comment.

The atheists are
     coming to your town and kill
everyone they see!

That said, most of what
     you hear from America
probably is like this.

That video is
     interesting, bizarre and is
for a great song, too.

The funny thing is,
     Gore was considered too *smart*
to be president.

Rights must be given
     on the present conditions,
not on the future.

The intelligent
     reader makes up her own mind,
regardless of points.

What is a problem
     is calling that same person
*dumb* for doing so.

[removed] The question
     shouldn't be is he too dumb
to be President.

Makes the best damn oil
     the earth can grow, I wonder
why we don't use it?

Makes the best damn oil
     the earth can grow, I wonder
why we don't use it?

I see it daily
     in Lebanon, Palestine
and of course Iraq.

Israeli sickness
     and the arab leaders are
match made in heaven.

Why not just donate
     what you can't use or don't want?
What a waste of time.

You can say that it's
     not great for your lungs but do
you have any proof?

This whole process is
     one of the more promising
drug research projects.

Why wouldn't rich men
     go to poor countries to bring
home multiple wives?

By the way, I am
     all for Israel defending
against Hezbollah.

We can all agree
     that this situation is
coming along great.

So on seeing his
     father with the Australia
book, he complains: "Dad!

What a bunch of crap.
     A large tree will crash through most
modern stick built homes.

You're of course correct,
     and you actually beat me by
about two minutes.

[deleted] Could you
     die from a wave that big if
you let it catch up?

Reason: Women are
     far pickier and far less
forgiving than men.

Also, if you look
     at the picture, he doesn't
look all that healthy.

Though not an apple
     vs orange, just mostly
saying what you love...

[removed] Paul, I'll be
     damned if I understand what
you're talking about.

By just providing
     shade your house will make you 40F
cooler already.

Linux is roughly
     as popular as Mac OS[0],
but it's not mainstream.

They list minimum
     specs and versions for Windows,
and usually Mac.

There's almost never
     any mention of Linux
on the packaging.

I do not argue
     that America will not
be sorry as well.

Come to think of it,
     that would be an interesting
way to teach writing.

I thought Catholics were
     I minority, but they're
not so much of one...

There are so many
     reasons that windows isn't
going anywhere.

Well if england is
     100F then other places will
be closer to 160F..

Having never been
     to the moon, I'm forced to take
the guy's word on it.

Apparently there
     are weird things that astronauts
do not talk about.

The problem is less
     with the outlet itself &
more with its placement.

I already knew
     everything I suffered through
in this article.

I have to really
     care one way or the other
to up or down it.

[deleted] Sometimes
     these "friend of mine" stories don't
tell the whole story.

Who is Floyd Landis?
     mine too, but i'm not going
to admit to it.

Split Baghdad in half
     for the Shia and Sunni,
and give the Kurds what?

After all, he did
     name the language after his
favorite TV show.

Except for ice cream.
     I have yet to serve myself
carrots in ice blocks.

Not sure of any
     particular aspects though.
I'm just curious.

All of the above.
     Those were in the images
in the article.

Move somewhere warm, or
     live in a homeless shelter.
I've done it before.

More control, I say.
     And the rain? [deleted] Same
blackout, same region.

All you have to do
     is get a green card when you
come over to work.

Ok, this one is
     what I expected the first
article to be.

The reality
     is that people cash their check
before they have it.

A very good point.
     I see this aspect used now
at my job a lot.

He proudly shows off
     all that he has built in his
years of solitude.

Someone who is good
     at that is not a person
you want to mess with.

No, *you* forgot. No,
     **you** forgot. No, ***you*** forgot.
No, ***YOU DID, FUCKER***.

This is part of what
     makes this documentary
interesting to watch.

You obviously
     haven't gotten the message
that Oil Is Special.

Perhaps I just don't
     understand the strategy
behind soccer. black.

I don't understand."
     It certainly is a huge
engineering feat.

*pokes brain with a stick*
     "I'm not someone who can be
summed up in two words.

Hell no. The spokesman
     essentially said *Er, they've
only just been born.

the truth will come out
     and Palin and McCain will
be stronger for it.

Correcting spelling
     on imaginary words...
now THAT's commitment.

We're not stupid, you
     don't have to make your plays on
words that obvious.

But won't they get stuck?
     A buck to school her on sex?
Are you kidding me?

This stuff is going
     to put me out of work one
day [deleted] Yep.

If our elections
     were based on popular vote
I might give a shit.

Get rich. Tons of kids
     like you have tried these simple
steps and are now rich.

Most importantly,
     the park is big, beautiful,
and has grill access.

I think it would be
     more effective to give them
the "God mode" cheat code.

She's a loose cannon.
     [deleted] Pic of the guy.
Or NEVER happened.

Get rich. Tons of kids
     like you have tried these simple
steps and are now rich.

Therefore you are wrong
     if you say that panic is
the main problem here.

Golden because DAMN
     Silver just ain't good enough
for magic like that.

Congratulations.
     ...Damn. And Stephen Hawking is
living on biscuits.

Propaganda does
     not have to have any roots
in reality.

Get rich. Tons of kids
     like you have tried these simple
steps and are now rich.

By the time they get
     this stuff it will be too late.
[deleted] Sweden?

what does it matter
     if her voter base prefers
to see her that way?

[deleted] Why does
     everyone keep mentioning
how "smart" Palin is?

Get rich. Tons of kids
     like you have tried these simple
steps and are now rich.

I-10 inside the Loop
     was worse and the Med Center
was completely fucked.

Our elections are
     simply more important &
interesting than yours.

What a pity. Yep,
     it's nice to hear moderate
voices now and then.

It really does seem
     that you are making the case
without evidence.

And ironically
     that's who I'm friends with now (but
still secretly hate).

Maybe the world will
     be saved from one more pointless
fucking vampire book.

It is a foolish
     thing, I think, to risk your life
to save a stranger.

I just maxed out both
     my contributions _as well
as_ my credit card!

Yes. [deleted] Thanks.
     It's a subject that I am
passionate about...

I guess you could say
     that means it was hard to read...
Where's the opposite rant?

My ivory tower
     would be beautifully if not
for those hardware guys!

I believe that where
     there is a lot of smoke, there
is most probably fire.

Sexuality,
     after all, has it's equal
share of ups and downs.

It sounds menacing,
     and scary, but it's really
not, it's quite simple.

That would not happen.
     I'd say you'd be better off
getting a Canon.

Those guys were heroes
     for saving everyone else
from the psychopath.

IF you are going
     to make an argument don't
start by quoting Fox.

Not just death, but death
     on a mass scale, involving
innocent people.

Someone else in these
     comments put it rather well.
McCain is a wolf.

And this is borne out
     by the types of people who
join doomsday cults. Huh?

It's a donkey all
     dressed up in pretty makeup
and a pushup bra.

We did. I bet its
     really made from shredded up
chinese newspapers.

If you were honest
     and said you notice a slight
taste difference, that's fine.

Fundamentalists
     often get confused about
who wrote the Bible.

That means you are gay
     Or Laura Bush advocates
for librarians.

You mean it is not
     consistent with what is done
in absence of slots?

Will do. I actually
     know this Nigerian prince
who can help you out.

That has got to be
     the least readable font I've
seen in body text.