Reddit Haikus

Hopefully, a more
     altruistic state accepts
these poor and treats them.

It might not even
     be because you're atheist
that you got fired.

I do it every
     night and I still don't know what,
how, or even why.

Immigration will
     probably be a bit harder,
but it won't stop you.

Mr. Kim. The three
     words that best describe you, are,
and I quote: "Stink. Stank.

The expectation
     for him will obviously
be extremely low.

There are many new
     features in batteries now
that help prevent this.

First thing I did when
     I saw the x ray was count
the hooks, screws, and rods.

Doesn't matter if
     that oppression is actually
happening or not. ^this.

He says he loves me,
     but I haven't the first clue
who me is, so... Yeah.

[deleted] Isn't
     putting it outside just like
giving it away?

even a simple
     hand wave to "stay back" can come
off as aggressive.

[deleted] Working
     out has always helped me snap
out of feeling down.

We we're taught falsehoods.
     We wasted time and money
in religion class.

If he had waited
     until now we could have got
shit on video.

So what you're saying
     is if you don't have any
fun they'll go away?

Large corporations
     are donating against him
for somebody else.

In fact, I helped treat
     Afghans on a regular
basis on our FOB.

Is it illegal
     for other banks to offer
loans at better rates?

Don't know how people
     who watched that can still think Newt
is "unflappable".

The shadow graphics
     dropped horribly low *only*
in that area?

Do I go to hell
     if God doesn't choose to make
Himself known to me?

Instead of feeling
     anxiety about food,
i just savor it.

During our last song,
     we had people come up on
stage and dance with us.

This probably won't be
     the last time you fight over
pussy, Lol.

[deleted] True, but
     he didn't know that beforehand.
Regardless, it's cute.

B) Can you link me
     to these memos you mention?
I'd like to see them.

[deleted] it's not
     assault if it's romantic.
don't you watch movies?

Turns out, if you melt
     ice in the nether, you can
even get water.

Are ALL men better
     than ALL women at ALL jobs?
Flower arranging?

Argument over.
     [deleted] It depends how
finished the good is.

You're an idiot.
     [deleted] [deleted] Same
shit happened to me.

None of the "BIG FOUR"
     took a deal- so the Sharks were
out of the picture.

Expiring someone's
     drivers license or credit
cards, etc.

Yes, my transcripts were
     sent in when I entered Sac
State a year ago.

I've worked at walmart,
     during the day, between black
friday and new years.

You'll develop good
     muscles in your clutch leg, but
I have no regrets.

like how maiden now
     has their three guitarists once
that one cat returned.

Remember the first
     few days are always the worst!
You can do it though!

Wow where so u live?
     The exact same thing happened
to me, There is none.

Please! Most outfitters
     seem to have exceptional
return policies.

The online scene is
     also completely different
that single player.

I absolutely
     wish you we're closer, you ask
all the right questions!

To solve this you just
     need to calm down and realize
you are doing it.

It amazes me
     how people manage to cope
with this shit sometimes.

There would certainly
     be less criminal gangs if
drugs were legalized.

Streaming is their job.
     March 1st (or thereabouts) should
be something special.

Who cares if they give
     up part of their salary.
It doesn't matter.

Yeah, but there wasn't
     really any genocide
on Jefferson's part.

I want a lever
     gun, and Dick's has a great deal
on Marlins right now.

Hopefully, a more
     altruistic state accepts
these poor and treats them.

I don't think he had
     any issues with the club
or any person.

Luckily I was
     outbid at the last minute.
Thanks, random sniper!

At one point it seemed
     Pollard is going to win
the match on his own.

Sam Axe is now on
     Burn Notice, which has Bunny
Colvin from The Wire.

YOU MUST TREAT AND THEM
     AS BITCHES. MY WOW GUILD SAYS
IT WORKS EVERYTIME.

I wish they would let
     you build faster and have things
destroyed faster too.

And anyways, there's
     little evidence of it.
It costs money now.

:D How much height did
     you gain upon recovery?
Reminds me of [this.

Cycles of going
     slightly up and then going
even further down.

Seriously, you
     can't just say that and not give
any follow up.

It's just the football
     culture, I don't think it has
to do with diving.

While that is true, no
     one's obligated to care
about their feelings.

He refused to tap
     and he's waking up today
with a broken arm.

Maybe you're OK
     with just producing Chevies
and Fords forever.

Is that the case? Hey,
     all writing is *weak* on it's
first or second drafts.

False. Make it wider,
     add a frame and wheels to it.
Best. Lamborghini.

Well, Jason Peters
     has his false start out of his
system already.

I tried to compose
     myself, politely said no
thank you, and took off.

That had better not
     be real, as I already
have enough jackets.

I'm not familiar
     with the rules of gravity.
Please enlighten me.

Not sure whatever
     even happened to the kid
and really don't care.

How many more games
     does Alabama without
Richardson? Zero.

It by Stephen King
     Yeah but who has everyday
knowledge of sanskrit?

But I mean, even
     adverse reactions aside,
I wouldn't need them.

It's not your duty.
     I think most people who browse
/new do it for fun.

I did the exact
     same thing on a meat slicer
cutting cucumbers.

I killed him. My pride
     killed him, and now my pride has
consumed me as well.

Sometimes the larger
     items do cost more, and no
one really buts them.

Makes sense, that's why they're
     pushing Newt, they know he has
no chance of winning.

They are finally
     going after Laurie Smith's
crooked ass? Awesome!

One teacher has had
     this weird popped out vein on her
forehead ever since.

Unfortunately,
     it's not available here
on the West Coast (yet).

Everyone looked great,
     danced, had fun and then took off
early to get drunk.

It makes a good first
     impression that people seem
to remember. twice?

Someone spotted me
     while I was masturbating
in Barnes & Noble.

Though, like the other
     poster said, child support will
be the real issue.

If you can't do this,
     find a therapist who will
work on this with you.

There are only two.
     You, and the guy who runs all
the other accounts.

Like I posted down
     below though, I should be fine
until my upgrade.

Congratulations.
     It sounds like things are working
great for you so far.

Even if a few
     registers over there are
no lines... Very odd.

It just feels clunky
     and weak compared to any
other style of play.

Last thing I want is
     to get on the landlords bad
side to be honest.

And it still looks like
     salvation army could do
no right in your eyes.

(the reasons I think
     thy is explained by him) Why?
Do you look different?

Do you look different?
     Do you like not recognize
yourself or something?

Was he a closet
     Nazi or something? There's no
way it's that simple.

As an aspiring
     game developer, this was
interesting to me.

I thought about it,
     especially with Lydia
whining the whole time.

Through regulation
     I had a no hitter, but
not a perfect game.

It always looks like
     gibberish by then. (sigh) Fine.
I'll pack the first bowl.

I think the Kurds would
     be happy to help the US.
and Afghanistan?

For some reason its
     just not where my heart or head
is at the moment.

Other projects keep
     popping up and that is where
my passion has been.

Children were taken
     care of by the whole village,
not just mom and dad.

Whoa there professor.
     In no way do I wish death
upon anyone.

[deleted] Bases
     in Iraq will be gone by
the end of the year.

They tried to kill John
     McClane for our sins... that's just
the way he likes it.

I need to order
     one more before I head home
for the holidays.

I grabbed my best friend
     as a witness and headed
there dragging my feet.

I found the "clash on
     the fields of eternity"
line a bit corny.

It is the hardest
     thing in the world to not be
with someone you love.

Haley will release
     anyone and everyone.
Nobody is safe.

They don't have money
     sitting in Savings accounts.
Even if they do.

I'm fairly sure their
     computer isn't even
*on* ten hours per month.

Maybe she *does* want
     to change and is hoping you'll
be the catalyst?

[deleted] I picked
     my brother up from getting
his wisdom teeth out.

I wouldn't have watched
     this shit if not for the great
early episodes.

hey, everybody!
     THIS GUYS A PHONY! I was
just gonna say that!

What bisexual
     stereotypes do you mean?
Promiscuity?

I really just want
     to hear him do everything
he can with that sound.

Otherwise the first
     glass will be lemon extract,
not citron vodka.

A can of Guinness,
     A The rich and powerful
dance around the law.

have water handy,
     and swish some around your mouth
right before you start.

There's only one way
     to get the change you're aiming
for, America.

We lost the war on
     terrorism, we are not
afraid of ourselves.

And you've pretty well
     outlined the problem with game
reviews in general.

I'm only two weeks
     in, so I'm absolutely
calorie counting.

They want to broaden
     their horizons by reading
about Y and Z.

So we have to tax
     to form a military
to defend ourselves.

However, they can
     also read people very
well because of this.

They would get so bad
     that I literally couldn't
raise my foot upward.

I am in England,
     but that has nothing to do
with my deduction.

I have never seen
     Ben X. No Country for Old
Men was amazing!

This is a tough course.
     Best of luck on the exam!
you disappoint me!

You're so pretty *now*,
     I never thought you'd turn out
looking like this!".... Thanks.

You want OT to be
     decided by an ugly
game of rugby? welp.

How did you manage
     to wedge your erect penis
back between your legs?

[deleted] It's odd.
     But it wouldn't stop me from
giving you a call.

I think it might be
     better if you put the text
before the photos.

ALL HAIL THE CHOSEN
     ONE He gets more picks but lets
more passes complete.

The only people
     who want that are those who can't
detect sarcasm.

Not when women get
     pregnant just so they can get
out of deploying.

It was at a Dave
     and Friends show, so it was just
Dave and Trey playing.

Being a smart ass
     I was always trying to find
ways around this rule.

How long ago do
     you see the Jack Nicholson
lookalike guy there?

The buddha probably
     experienced everything
like this all the time.

Disable the man.
     This is a necessary
thing that must be done.

What is he doing
     is illegal on the road.
No, buy the damn game.

I imagine blue's
     clues was quite difficult when
Magenta came out.

And you crossed the street
     when a little light was red!
You could've been hurt!

Clean hit. [deleted]
     Weiner artist* WOW Hong Kong
International!!!

They are showing him
     more disrespect with that shit
than anything else.

It certainly is
     not the person's fault, that is
for sure. No free will.

I THINK YOU CAN TELL
     A LOT ABOUT A MAN BY
HIS FAVORITE ICE CREAM.

In Boston, let's be
     honest, they were at the tail
end of their careers.

We don't have kids yet,
     so they don't exist to suck
up most of our time.

This sadly is true
     as well for people who work
in nuclear plants.

For years, I had trust
     issues and I still struggle
with it to this day.

Now im not saying
     leona is completely
useless, far from it.

As a Patriot
     fan, that was a TERRIBLE
call against Fletcher.

[deleted] They pull
     some of these moves off it will
really upgrade them!

Now you're so poor, you
     just have to pirate someone's
comedy special?

Changing it to be
     "man and woman or two gay
persons" would be weird.

Also, I'm a bit...
     young for a job. TRANSFORMERS!
MORE THAN MEETS THE EYE!

I was told they start
     shipping after the 18th
when new stock arrives.

What if my brain made
     those sounds when I was thinking?
i second the more....

i second the more....
     I know its like a month old
but i just found it!!!

Love that place, they will
     let you chill and sample damn
near anything there.

Yes, but Fletcher has
     to control himself or he's
going to get tossed.

An assembly was
     suddenly announced, which was
more than unusual.

I can't even bring
     myself to be cordial or
normal about it.

FINISH HIM! A (non
     judgemental) question- Did you
quit smoking? Cut back?

If so how did you
     incorporate this into
your weight loss planning?

If there really were
     people with steel weapons, where
did said weapons go?

But settle down. Yeah,
     it's definitely still too
expensive for me.

[deleted] So what's
     your reasoning for the call
protecting Grossman?

He's tall, crazy smart,
     handsome, has great hair, and smells
good all of the time.

I haven't read too
     much about Islamic views
on evolution.

And yes, I'm sure there
     are racist Japanese who
mock Americans.

ALL PROGRESS HAS BEEN
     SHOT DOWN. [deleted] I think
he means hack and slash.

Have mercy on our
     souls if Sarah Palin was
our Vice President.

What other streamers
     talk instead of putting on
music all the time?

Author kills herself,
     regardless of a somewhat
happy ending. Yep.

In the booth that we're
     in, it has the wall you see
on the left and right.

doing the same HIS
     NAME IS DAVID ANDERSON.
Hey, no problem friend.

and my grandmother
     the day after my birthday
where i talked to her.

Happy endings are
     not going to be a good
way to resolve this.

Anyone near Fort
     Wayne, IN wanna pick me up
on your way?? Um guys.

I have my fingers
     crossed though as my one Aunt works
at a nail salon.

And I think you need
     to stop caring if guys think
you are attractive.

Even the unborn
     baby is somehow the key
to saving mankind.

There's a pretty high
     number of good players, it's
really hard to say.

LOL this was
     played on the Rose Garden big
screen during a game.

Fuck those atheists.
     Save it in one of those big
water cooler jugs.

We didn't choose a damn
     thing except to make the best
with the hand we got.

I'll definitely
     try to get some the next time
I'll go to China.

Unless we make some
     real magic happen, we just
fucking lost today.

Those are perfect, don't
     let anybody ever
tell you otherwise.

Hall's voice is very
     monotone compared to most
other narrators.