Reddit Haikus

What it does do, is
     give me job security.
Does sound like a bug.

You're an idiot.
     They do want him there, the church
rules don't allow it.

should've researched blink
     is that the one where jews swing
chicken by their necks?

Then, he'll cum while you're
     fucking him, because he will
finally feel it.

IT'S NOT A GOOD LOOK
     FOR YOU. DON'T YOU KNOW YOU LOOK
SILLY IN THAT HAT?

Not because it's how
     people perceive Britain, but
that it's accurate.

he was trying to sell
     everyone supplemental
insurance Cool. Thanks.

Cacti are awesome,
     I have nearly a dozen.
Stop hating hater.

[deleted] more like
     'Sign up to be on the new
terror watch list' This.

With enough money
     should could sue each copy cat
out of existence.

After work we would
     go and grab drinks, at the time
she was with someone.

That way no one is
     ever wrong and no one is
ever offended!

Except the difference
     between many other false
claims is the impact.

Have her accept help
     every once in awhile when
she clearly needs it.

Negative Income.
     Speed as fast as I can go.
Get paid by The Man.

We have a little
     theme park called Storybook Land
and its all Oz themed.

They wrecked havoc all
     over my face and body.
Just Two mosquitoes!!

I got a hero
     token when there was only
one character left.

It's kind of true though,
     the balance will occur, one
way or the other.

War ultimately
     is about loss --not gain like
the goal seems to be.

But you aren't going
     to be slowing yourself down
slowly, is my point.

And the following
     slow motion scene of the dogs
walking an alley.

Proliferating
     these statistics helps debunk
these misconceptions.

Man, I think of Bill
     Murray crying every time
I hear this song... sniff.

You. You just made me
     the happiest person on
this planet. great track!

Personally, I like
     Manic Street Preachers' take. God,
I cannot STAND her.

He cooked, cleaned made me
     lunch and even filled my car
when it needed gas.

Down voted in trees
     is something I never do,
but this is just dumb.

Maybe false claims should
     have a higher penalty,
but nothing unique.

The adult setting
     is definitely no help
to the grappling cause.

If you move at C,
     no time seems to pass for you,
to an observer.

Are you the guy who's
     been falsely accused of rape
by the dirty slut?

That's why. At least that's
     what I hear in my head when
crap like this happens.

Sadly, this is true.
     Better yet, what if his name
was "Who"? Oh come on.

And then I felt it,
     the tug of life. No! No! No!
I silently begged.

Never mind though, I've
     heard rumours about some more
dates being announced.

Pretty quiet, too,
     though I haven't done too much
hard core gaming yet.

I still feel thirsty
     after drinking warm water.
Come to Reno, Friend.

But nope, she'd always
     come to me and she'd always
be like "You're so smart!

His name is Robert
     Paulson. It looks like livestock
pens, or similar.

However I feel
     the rest of the movie just
didn't hold up. Correct.

Well, if you want more
     'balance,' then the classes will
become more alike.

But skipping the whole
     event seems like something OP
will come to regret.

They came in a black
     tube and were a delicious
salty tasty treat.

[deleted] dexter?
     Like the American Wild
West? Yes it was leaked.

Shit man that's fucked up.
     I don't get why everyone
gets so defensive.

So one should always
     be a pacifist and take
the shit thrown at them?

A lot of people
     do unintentional things
when they're blackout drunk.

Problem solved. I'm not
     saying he should take his job
at all, anywhere.

In your face, Einstein!
     [deleted] At least it was
"tons", not "elephants".

My father wasn't
     lying when he said he didn't
know where to find me.

Not a shame, trust me.
     Forced smiles are trite, yes, and lame.
But to each their own.

I meant the penis.
     Don't go shoving a penis
down anyone's throat!

I think this joke came
     packaged in the first cell phones
to be mass produced.

Yeah telling someone
     what they should and shouldn't think
is totally rad.

But this idea
     is fucking ridiculous.
Grow up USA.)

whenever my friends
     and I refer to trees, it's
always cheeseburgers.

Cute. Amnesia is
     pretty damn scary if you
allow it to be.

Holy fuck shit balls
     fuck I'd forgotten that bit
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.

The terrible thing
     is that *he did*, and he was
dead three days after.

You bet Rome had laws
     on the books helping business.
That took lobbying.

i think this actually
     credits the story talking
about the "wing zone".

that material
     look like 3M 1080-M21 Matte silver,
but I could be wrong.

I just looked before
     I posted this. Those cameras
only have one wheel.

The pose is somewhat
     interesting, but the setting
doesn't work for me.

I can confirm this.
     Or Lacrosse balls. Cool, one is
all yours, PM me.

This is so you know
     you won't scare her away when
you do, lol.

Awesome fish! Great job.
     Details please Belt is the term
you actually wanted.

But once I realized
     that I'm way cool, everything
got way more awesome.

One of the biggest
     kickers for me was also
the disciples death's.

You're hired! Hey man
     your spoiler tags are broken,
thought I'd let you know.

So, I turn the light
     on upstairs and I hear him
scream even louder.

Maybe when you grow
     up you can be a real troll.
[deleted] Hold on.

LOL SOMEONE
     DEPRESSED HERE, LETS ALL TELL THEM
TO DIE LOL.

Except it turned out
     the upgrade to the backup
software hadn't worked.

Putting the hot mold
     in the cooling tray made me
feel like a blacksmith.

I bid you goodbye!
     I lived there last year, but I'm
so glad I'm gone now.

and she is so glad
     that I am there to please her
and not just myself.

Sneakers travel on
     my feet to conserve pack space,
flip flops in the pack.

Tell them what you want
     and how much you can spend, they'll
probably work with you.

No fun about that.
     Who ISN'T in the market
for a private jet?

I would totally
     love one, but I can't come close
to affording it.

That doesn't really
     tell you anything about
the hardware status.

it doesn't matter
     how he looked or what he said.
she looks even worse.

Someone sent me some
     punk rock sampler CDs, too.
That was really cool.

I guess I was just
     looking for someone to say
not to be afraid.

"...things are not written
     in stone" I'll add you, gonna
smash some in tonight.

They basically didn't
     do any research and just
assumed they were right.

Also, who are these
     people insisting there be
no memorial?

You watched it, and THEN
     you realized that you probably
didn't need to see that?

Yay Newton Golden
     Eye Right, I was expecting
Military Code.

I guess I could prove
     I'm playing on adventure
and not creative?

So I think this whole
     scenario you describe
is pretty absurd.

Not really: it's much
     less intuitive than what
you're trying to upstage.

Well thank you! And yeah
     I was thinking of doing
something cool like that.

Also: Rage faces!!!
     :D I'm hardly ever good...
Thanks for the kind words.

Good enough for me.
     Wonderful news! I agree
to a certain point.

As for your issue
     with people who "pick and choose"
things from the Bible...

Master's in Europe
     is generally easier
than in Canada.

Not a single fuck
     is given by anyone
who isn't from here.

It is hard to make
     the argument that this is
good for Germany.

Twice. It does You mean
     Nixon, even though Reagan
hated weed also.

Read 'French judges probe
     maker of discredited
pill' on Yahoo! News.

I appreciate
     you wishing Luck upon us,
for he will be ours.

But hey yeah, maybe
     your scenario is what
would happen instead.

I don't watch that show.
     EDIT: Nevermind, I need
to learn to scroll down.

I have tried posting
     chain letter and it DID NOT
treat cancer. Thank you.

For a while they were
     turning them on for severe
thunderstorm watches.

We're only special
     so as far as we haven't
been duplicated.

It's like getting shot
     and dislodging a blood clot
that would have killed you.

LOL ok,
     if they're called "feel good" stories,
why do I tear up?!

I was on my phone
     earlier so I couldn't
dig up references.

The sites suggested
     so far should help get me off
on the right foot though!

I see a very
     bleak and miserable future
for one of these groups.

The driver had slowed
     down because he was looking
for somewhere to park.

If it's not a toy,
     please, do tell, what the hell do
you define it as?

If you already
     know what's coming, it loses
some of its value.

[deleted] Williams
     hasn't done much this year but
he is still a stud.

The adopter has
     to be approved both by me
and by the rescue.

Maybe she is just
     trying to let you know you could
phrase it differently?

Take it in the ass?
     Bit harsh isn't it? "Wanna
know what else I see?

Ever heard of them?"
     They're one of the biggest bands
ever right now. *Yes.

This worked for a guy
     at my school who took the brad
pitt fight club approach.

I don't think the part
     where you tell your boss what you'll
be doing is weird.

I'm not sure how old
     you are and I registered
just to post in here.

Why would it make sense
     for a random soldier or
beast to pick it up?

It was literally
     open in another tab
while I made this post.

Tag. Mocked. Ads. Awesome.
     Other Ad Agencies. Ticked.
Try. Ridicule. Fails.

Don't like the feedback
     yet it is constructive, please
ignore and move on.

I enjoy hiking,
     but talking about hiking
isn't exciting.

Nice scarf! Pathetic.
     I'm talking about Quake pros
and Quake pros only.

Way off course to what
     I usually listen to,
but I love that song.

While pricey, they've more
     than paid for themselves in three
years of use. Great bag.

However I don't
     think the automatic guess
is that interesting.

Or worse, the one who
     *asks* for a recount report
after every pull.

If you're a Bryan
     Cranston fan then I hope you're
watching Breaking Bad.

As a Dutch I don't
     know if I should be proud or
ashamed about that.

Madden: Now what you
     need to do is score more points
than the other team.

This is real, and I've
     tried my best to emulate
the situation.

Were your classes like
     actual online classes or
were they self guided?

You see, in English,
     words can have different meanings
in different contexts.

It's about knowing
     your body and mind and what
makes you feel the best!

Oh, he also pissed
     on the air mattress I was
going to sleep on.

He would keep his head
     down and fire the weapon towards
the opposing troops.

He actually shows us
     the Libertarian cards,
ugly as they are.

It HAS been a while.
     A lot of people think it's
critiquing those things.

Baby can't you see.
     I'm calling? A guy like you
should wear a warning.

Why do you believe
     that God is responsible
for evolution.

If you go, be sure
     to visit the one in West
Duluth. and come on.

Just because it's not
     overt, doesn't mean that it's
not misogyny.

Fucker. Luckily,
     after sixth grade, that shit head
was out of my life.

it doesn't even
     have to be sensual, its
all about the grip.

So, yes, people are
     going hungry rather than
bear the shame of it.

come back to visit!
     There's one in Anaheim, too,
in an arcade. Yeah!

I'm confounded by
     how much money actors make
as well as athletes.

THIS is why we need
     more taxes! lol! Thanks!
I will check them out.

But I could be wrong
     and just not explored as much
as I thought I did.

Be grateful it didn't
     just say "you're noisy, fuck off".
That's what they're thinking.

The cougar wasn't
     phased by me standing in it's
way for a second.

They catch you as you
     come in the door to make sure
you get it yearly!

No. It's a belief
     in the same sense as sitting
is doing something.

smooth aka Robot
     like creatures who willingly
charge machine gun nests.

Mississippi has
     one of the lowest prices
out there for schooling.

Except the Red Sox
     might be losing Ortiz who
is a free agent.

I have a shampoo,
     a conditioner, razor,
and a shower glove.

I find it funny
     that you rejects facts based on
your own ignorance.

I didn't say I knew
     everything about the world
because I have kids.

If it is very
     good one, it has knocked off all
the competitors.

Heads up, troll alert.
     (really, look at his history.)
Thank god for RES tags.

It's not that we don't
     like communicating, or
that we're bad at it.

Intro and the book.
     I guess because I'm married
but don't have kids yet.

Getting to see them
     at Comic Con made the wait
easier BUT STILL.

Just hit the jungle
     recently also, playing
as the Asian chick.

I feel like my child
     is a bad influence on
the other children!

If you go shortly
     after it rains, it's a lot
faster and rougher.

For any of these,
     choose one (plane, line, point) going
through the origin.

Were you jittery
     at all around the corpses
when you first started?

like a company
     that makes recycled paper
out of old paper?

False. You will can't land
     on a star and you will burn
up if you get close.

Its a great movie
     and Clive Owen was a good
pick in that movie.

The cat seems to be
     pretty serious about
keeping you classy.

This way the results
     are immediate but way
more in your control.

Personally, I like
     having some divisions but
I am not elite.

Quantity just came
     off as the amount of fuel
at hand to be burned.

I guarantee you
     she still probably wonders "what
if" just as you do.

We want to make sure
     that next weeks games are truly
**the** Games of the Week.

We live in the same
     area, so I know how
expensive it is.

Anyway, this is
     the kind of advice I'd like
to see around here.

I didn't really mean
     to turn this into a "why
can't I lose weight?" thread.

Should they teach kids how
     to read a telegram just
so they don't "lose touch"?

My public transit
     experiences in those
cities were awful.

Hopefully someone
     here will have some good advice
for people like us.

If you really want
     the relationship to just
grow slowly, it will.

As much as men or
     women hate to admit it,
we are not equal.

If she really was,
     it obviously wasn't
that noticeable.

Since in those cases
     you are basically shooting
with one hand mostly.

The reaction can
     definitely vary from
person to person.

Why don't we get all
     teary eyed and think maybe
this time it is real?

[deleted] I would
     recommend against Welcome
to the Monkey House.

But it is way too
     hard to focus for writing
the bulk of the scene.

My atheist Jew
     friend still goes to Passover
at his parents' house.