Reddit Haikus

Also the bible
     don't forget to claim they are
based off the bible.

Also, if you think
     you're about to sneeze, remove
razor from nuts *first*.

I guess as you age,
     you are more likely to stop
supporting the cause.

And are you going
     to follow the rules about
how much you can eat?

And even if you
     got away with it, you don't
think this is stealing?

DO NOT USE SOAP, don't
     listen to anyone who
tells you otherwise.

I'm hoping it will
     be just as amazing now
as when we were kids.

You buy the Glock, you
     get night sights (either added
on or in a box).

More and more recruits
     are coming from suburban
backgrounds, not rural.

(Unfortunately,
     Greece is now in the Euro,
so they can't do that.

I'VE SEEN THIS FLOATING
     AROUND HERE MORE THAN A FEW
TIMES, BUT THAT'S ALRIGHT.

As much as I hate
     Purdue, I have to feel bad
for that other guy.

Pick any other
     country in Europe and you'll
find it easier.

And one might remove
     the camshaft and grind a bit
off the cam lobes too.

Hey, we love you too!
     You're the short little blue guys
with the red hats, right?

I'm waiting to see
     how this ends up, I could go
either way on this.

Ethics aren't the point.
     The point is it's no different
for the publisher.

probably for the same
     way a white person with bleached
hair isn't racist.

Unfortunately,
     she made most of her earnings
during the marriage.

Definitely will
     let you guys know if I come
up with anything.

I mean speed also
     effects the price but the main
basis is our caps.

I am terrified
     when there is hair in between
my toes or fingers.

They are great, but if
     you look only for them, you
are missing the game.

use that dropper tool
     to get the color, then switch
to bucket and fill.

I'm afraid they can
     smell the blood or see it if
walking behind me.

It sucks! A golden
     chance to become lucid slips
through your fingertips!

I do indeed NOT
     care about democracy.
We don't live in one.

I only put Glock
     parts in it, not polishing
jobs or anything.

I looked at Kayak
     Explore. You can't put in dates
you want to travel.

[deleted] Learn how
     to recite the alphabet
backwards, flawlessly.

You hate, you're sober.
     [deleted] Their banana
cream pie is awesome.

My mistake. EDIT:
     The source has been on the pic
this entire time.

We took him outside
     and let him lay in the sun
for a little while.

I didn't even know
     about a "karma system"
like that, lol.

David Cameron
     today pronounced the action
was 'legal and right'.

interval training
     keeps the heart rate up during
the walking as well.

I let them build up
     for a few days then spend some
hours breaking them down.

They have a great time
     and leave with respect for their
racial differences.

The right to bear arms
     is so much more explicit
than freedom of speech.

*The kid playing me
     apparently wanted me
to be pissed off now!

we would all be dead,
     locked in chimp torture basements.
Hi my name is George.

Well, from your PC
     to them and them replying
to you only though.

Huh? Do they make you
     overly hot or something
(the memory foam)?

That way it looks like
     I'm taking my time to cook
up a good response.

I really enjoyed
     Czech Republic, but almost
no one spoke English.

My expectations
     are so low on this movie
that I could care less.

I mean, most (not all)
     abortions occur after
consensual sex.

Fuck them. I love you.
     It depends on how much you
pay them. \o/ STEVE HOLT!

Hey man, PM me
     your email address, resume
& portfolio.

[deleted] I don't
     need corrupt politicians
to represent me.

if you want to sleep
     with someone, do it (just be
safe). if you don't, don't.

I was just thinking
     about this very problem.
I love bonus points!

Goldman Sachs doesn't
     tolerate competition
in that department.

"hello, world!" I hope
     he posts again, things are just
getting interesting.

Use the machine gun
     and tell me there's no recoil.
yeah, you nailed that one.

I DON'T GIVE A FUCK
     ABOUT YOUR FUCKING STUPID
NOVELTY ACCOUNT.

Now I see Archer
     Artist. I can live with that.
There is no difference.

Have you ever been
     in a car with a teenage
girl behind the wheel?

So her and her on
     the side fuck buddy can laugh
at you while fucking.

Anyway, smart guy,
     why don't you tell me why things
are the way they are?

Good luck, I do like
     having a good Knicks around.
[deleted] Yea, what?

Delicious. If you've
     never had it, I highly
recommend trying it.

Actually, judging by
     the fact you have responded
to this twice, YOU FAT!

On another note,
     it's biblical to have sex
and make the babies.

That's even better.
     Dude, your friend's that one guy who
ruins jokes. Same here.

I do not know how
     i would classify myself.
That was the main point.

I have a hard time
     identifying what can
and cannot be changed.

Obviously it's
     failed because I don't appear
to be helping me.

To add to this, why
     haven't you done anything
interesting lately?

no problem, can't wait
     to see the batman movie!
How bout Black Mountain.

You never answer
     the question "Do you know why
I pulled you over?"

This is really cool
     and I wish I could ski half
as well as you can.

Its *easy* to get
     strong and thin if you tend toward
those traits naturally.

Notification
     latency is usually
less than a second.

To get him over
     the awkwardness, tell him some
shit you like to hear.

I got my penis
     back the next year but still had
to pay off the car.

So we joke around
     by doing exactly what
you describe: "I raged.

Edit: male I got
     another look at that Hanes
commercial last night.

He's good, but it seems
     like no amount of insight
can help him. Thank you!!

My point was only
     that active cooling systems
are *always* required.

I have a family
     plan, with my wife and I both,
using data plans.

Their football is just
     as indecisive as their
government spiders.

Ireland. We spend more
     on education than on
our military.

Had one the other
     day over a year later.
Still good lol.

The sentiment is
     well appreciated, sir
(or maam). Thank you much.

Do I find thriller
     movies more enjoyable
than gore movies? Yes.

Where will it compete
     within the competitive
base within the town.

Looks like it paid off.
     Instead of her pushing me,
Im pushing her now.

Do you beat yourself
     up about things? If so what?
Whats your greatest fear?

Buy you some screens man,
     they make smoking a whole lot
more enjoyable.

I suspect if you
     restrain from being so rude,
that might not happen.

My sister loves her
     husband's red cheeks, don't worry
about it too much!

All in all, probably
     exactly what Square Enix
wanted me to feel.

If someone hits him
     back, knocks him out, then the league
is in a mess, though.

If I cannon rush
     you once and win, yeah you got
unlucky a bit.

And I'd be lying
     if I didn't say I enjoy
having my words read.

Lost a few dear friends
     (a cat and a dog) and still
miss them years later.

Who in their right mind
     would rent a jeep during their
visit to the US?

Then the candidates
     should all be disqualified,
and do it again.

FUCK YOU Would you be?
     It was a while ago, I'll
see what I can do!

I wake them up or
     call them up to reassure
myself they're alive.

Pumped for Sir Ian
     McKellan I AM GANDALF!
AND GANDALF MEANS **ME**!!!

Or you were playing
     in the pro league getting paid
for your stupid stats?

And that homestead states
     are where old people lives or
move to, to retired.

Fuck. Chinese restaurants
     are the loudest places I've
ever visited.

The second time was
     fucking perfect, never felt
so much energy.

People need to know
     that they are responsible
for their own actions.

And the 360p changing
     to 480p thing goes unnoticed.
Fucking beautiful.

That's wrong and silly.
     Both of your seasons last twelve
overlapping months.

[deleted] INdeed.
     You must procure a copy
if you haven't played.

Bonus points if you
     get it engraved with her new
initials on it.

I coughed the candy
     up and my dog promptly came
over and ate it.

If you do tell them,
     consider sharing how much
you need them right now.

You guys travel well.
     Nice, It's a great car. No not
all of them, just most.

Not to split hairs, but
     Teddy got shot a little
while before the speech.

You just said that you
     care enough about something
that you *could* care less.

He was a skater
     boy, she said, "See ya later
boy" Or years even.

Just like vinyl is
     never going to come back.
It's not a bad thing.

I did think the art
     on the window was pretty
cool, I must admit.

It's natural to hold
     your camera vertically when
you shoot a person.

I always feel like
     someone will be behind me
or under the bed.

As for *where* you can
     land, I'm pretty sure there aren't
any restrictions.

have you had any
     patients who were just pissed off
that they were dying?

I'm getting queasy
     all over again now just
thinking about it.

Looks interesting though.
     I'd like to see one set up
and ready to go.

DO NOT say shit like
     "What the fuck are you doing?
You're acting crazy."

And of course the worst
     sin of all in this country
is to be racist.

Just because you may
     have easy pickings doesn't
mean you need to pick.

I've been called that too
     but girls love them and I'm sure
you'll find guys love yours.

I went back and filled
     in plot with Morrison's run
on Batman as well.

The fast heavy kicks
     help with that mental push you
can begin lacking.

I've noticed that pump
     rates vary by pump even
within one station.

Just curious, what
     sort of laws are there which you
think makes it stand out?

Critical mass is
     far more useful for a bomb
than a power plant.

I don't think people
     have problems with 'woe' in 'Woe
is me,' thankfully.

In fact they're pretty
     much guaranteed a middle
class lifestyle at best.

That looks like it was
     being fed to rats vs
beta carotene.

For the record, I'm
     not trying to suggest that you
owe me a ticket.

*sigh* It's amazing
     how people this fucking dense
have survived this long.

Also when he spoke
     you felt like you were going
to die of old age.

You would need to tap
     into your red head temper
to achieve those eyes.

See that all the time.
     [deleted] i thought it was
'run' I don't like them.

Oh god... Saying stuff
     like that is gonna make me
need to wank again.

The correct answer
     is C, a girl who is friends
with neither of them.

And I don't really
     have a lot of money if
that's what you're asking...

I can't wait to watch
     Lady. Best fifty bucks I've
spent in a long time.

I have a few jobs
     yet none seem to have people
I can relate to.

Sorry. Journalists,
     AWAY! I have never run
into this issue.

There is nothing wrong
     with this, and it probably won't
cause any problems.

Good bluffs aren't random.
     You know that phrase that say on
TV all the time?

I'm staying away
     from this topic, so it can
fade into the past.

You have seen through it,
     so now do whatever you
want (within reason).

I'm moving there from
     Hawaii and I don't know
ANYONE that has.

Are you getting more
     and more gorgeous everyday
or is it just me?

They wouldn't be caught
     dead investing in the game.
what maps do you use?

A: less than a week.
     Teams lose. It's a fact. Just hope
for the best next year.

Then absolutely
     position the teal circle
on the bottom right.

But, I think some more
     insight into that would prove
golden the readers.

[deleted] Isn't
     everyone in the Army
part of a kill team?

I answered an ad
     from a guy who said he would
suck me off. He did.

He did. Not my best
     anecdote, but I enjoyed
the experience.

I thought the ent tree
     had some type of joint (which turned
out to be the bird).

Once we got over
     that, our sex life went to new
(and GREAT) heights. Good luck!

My question is how
     do I explain the science
behind the theory?

I haven't played ME2
     yet, but I absolutely
hated the Mako.

[pun] Not bad at all.
     We so excited. Fun fun
fun fun fun fun fun.

[deleted] do you
     mean they like to pop their own
or other peoples?

What Microsoft is
     doing here is more than good.
It's spectacular.

I'm high every day.
     Yes yes every discussion
is a circle jerk.

Although, when I need
     to rush, I normally replace
one or the other.

It kinda looks like
     ivory, I'm just curios
if it actually is?

Same in Italy.
     We used to lock up people
we were afraid of.

I could recommend
     some depending on what you
are interested in.

Just because something
     is generally accepted,
does not make it right.

That's what they told me
     about I Gotta Feeling.
Now they've gone too far!

Other people might
     be happier at different
places on the scale.

Wouldn't that just mean
     most people just want to learn
more about Europe?

Especially if you've
     already got a decent
selection of champs.

Ants too. Try growing
     cucumbers without ants, you'll
never get a fruit.

and one on the ground
     which I watched ants crawl into
the blooms of for hours.

So good. [deleted]
     Wow, way to mentor. I'd hate
to work for you, jeez.

There's really something
     to be said about the stripped
down story telling.

Does it have to be
     after your thesis, or can
you put it next year?

If anything he'd
     want to distinguish himself
to spread the message.

Can't a company
     be privately held and NOT
overtly evil?

i really wanna
     smoke some weed right now What if
he's a lesbian?

If she has a large
     amount of debt you also
gain that in marriage.

If you folks truly
     believe all mechanics are
crooks, that's just sad. Ouch.

so that's what Sunday
     BLOODY Sunday was about!
Now it all makes sense.

I've seen this before.
     Made me cry like a baby.
Can't watch it again.

At this point, the bag
     sit up and starts to scream, Joe
screams, and runs away.

but what Destiny
     is doing is a whole new
level of awesome.

When she breaks the news
     completely freak out about
how happy you are.

He could easily
     get a new one with a new
copy of the game.

I worked on the bit
     where the helicopter ploughs
into the zombies.

This is my account
     and the fiat currency
means nothing to me.

again, not a big
     deal, games have always needed
updates, deal with it.

Im a twenties male,
     and single, so cooking skills
are basic at most.

I hate silicone
     based, but they last the longest.
and oil based as well.

Both you and I are
     using data (which is nice),
but your data sucks.

I sure would hope so,
     job postings are popping up
at an increased rate.