Reddit Haikus

You're looking at every haiku that occurred on a Reddit comment between December 2005 and October 2016 (10.8 years). Some intentional, most unintentional.

The haikus make up 24,450,805 (24.4 million) characters or 4,519,927 (4.5 million) words. For perspective, the entire Harry Potter series is 1,084,170 words. This is 4 times the size of all Harry Potter books combined. It would take the average person 390 hours and 50 minutes (16 days) to read them all.

The haikus were extracted from 2,718,784,464 (2.7 billion) comments across 416,729 unique subreddits for a total of 80,908,650,976 (80.9 billion) words.

These pages are regenerated every 1 hour with updated scores -- please browse and upvote/downvote away.

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Page 1674 of 1746

Haiku #5131

Anyway, it was
     in a can, and only cheap
oil comes in a can.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5132

Or even better;
     let me show you some places
and how to have fun.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5133

Also he didn't know
     the difference between a file
and directory.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5134

[deleted] Sounds like
     he's some kind of autistic.
depends on lately.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5135

The far left is just
     as bad as the far right, just
on the opposite side.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5136

The mother didn't lie
     to police when she told them
what **her son told her**.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5137

Wasn't it the case
     that the names of minors charged
with crimes were withheld?

Score: 0          

Haiku #5139

Post more? Well, he did
     say he needed some rogaine
to put in his hair.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5140

I can't understand
     why it is more wrong for me
to choose *b* than *c*.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5141

But just hear me out.
     Why does your family dislike
this guy? Do you know?

Score: 0          

Haiku #5142

We try not to talk
     about it, she's a bit self
conscious about it.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5143

Agreed. We have some
     great panel quiz shows, sitcoms
and comedy shows.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5144

How the hell do you
     have a right to privacy
on a public street?!

Score: 0          

Haiku #5145

I will simply pick
     the counter to send in when
you force my lead out.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5146

Your information
     is a second hand account
from a biased source.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5147

The fact that one was
     greater than the other is
all the proof needed.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5148

If money was good,
     your argument does nothing
to support that fact.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5149

I've found that I can
     only handle anal if
I'm in complete charge.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5150

My bad. I'm in, but
     let's not get too excited
until the 25th.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5151

Send me a pm
     This is why "get out the vote"
is ridiculous.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5152

Now their fathers can't
     sit around a fire with them.
Maybe they had sons."

Score: 0          

Haiku #5153

Not very big, just
     the size to hold three, maybe
four reams of paper.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5154

Come up with your own
     take on the content design,
and send it to him.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5155

And Toronto can't
     do that because it'd be
destroyed in a week.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5156

Windy, full of Cubs
     fans Maybe the guy just wants
to smell like an axe?

Score: 0          

Haiku #5157

this is how I see
     North Korea, only with more
nuclear weapons.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5158

don't lie, you'd just spend
     all your time trying to trap him
between two portals.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5159

Wouldn't you assume
     she is waiting for her mum
to finish paying?

Score: 0          

Haiku #5160

I kinda get that,
     but I like capturing them
more than shooting them.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5161

Be yourself, but be
     the most attractive and cool
version of yourself.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5162

Journalist. Few things
     impact a person's life more
than economics.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5163

A haliburton
     subsidiary is not
chartered in the US.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5164

Like everyone else
     is saying, see what you can
do with your fingers.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5165

Bigger house, newer
     cars, and arguably more
successful than I.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5166

If it existed
     at one time, then it should still
be available.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5167

You might get someone
     to create it after you
sell them on the art!

Score: 0          

Haiku #5168

When I finish I'm
     usually mildly thirsty
but not crazily.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5169

Comedy shows are
     geared towards the "common man", not
the business elite.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5170

You're obviously
     depressed and who knows what else.
Maybe it could help?

Score: 0          

Haiku #5171

This is why grated
     is best and his roommate is
probably still alive.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5172

His connections are
     crazy, but in the end not
all that interesting.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5173

I'd like to point out
     that even Michael Scott has
stopped making this joke.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5174

Just agree to all
     the shit that they are saying,
and they will be stumped.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5175

Awesome. Then please don't
     perpetuate that myth when
you know it's not true.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5176

this boy is clearly
     mentally deficient, same
as your dad's whole squad...

Score: 0          

Haiku #5177

Just cause it's locked up
     doesn't mean it's gonna be
quiet about it.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5178

Another good way
     to lower your hourly rate
is to do less work.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5179

Your hourly rate has
     to cover you spending time
looking for business.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5180

wat You could also
     work in a large city or
another country.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5181

It has been proven
     that results can be altered
and faked with practice.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5182

Love the pants around
     the ankles. Extremely hot.
Very turned on here.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5183

You're just like every
     other paparazzi cunt
out there. name it stew.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5184

info so I can
     send you some money for drugs
and alcohol, thanks.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5185

You're dealing with shit
     you obviously have no
fucking clue about.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5186

Make a prediction
     based on your goddamn instinct.
Then experiment.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5187

I'd like more travel
     as well, and shorter yet more
challenging projects.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5188

The reality
     is, he's just passing around
department gossip.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5189

I did not suffer
     any of the physical
side effects, either.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5190

[deleted] My kids.
     [deleted] Why would it be
considered cheating?

Score: 0          

Haiku #5191

They're a bit too dark
     for my taste, but the contrasts
are really striking.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5192

A similar taste
     in music gives you something
"cool" to talk about.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5194

I trust this source much
     much more than a reporter
with an agenda.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5195

If you need or want
     something specifically, THEN
you go to a store.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5196

I guess it would be
     too costly to implement
file level locking?

Score: 0          

Haiku #5197

I never wanted
     any, but I keep ending
up with one or two.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5198

Nuclear weapons
     have saved a great deal more lives
than they have taken.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5199

Perhaps see if you
     can find any family friends
that can assist you.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5200

I think you just walk
     on over and start playing.
What is that in Smoots?

Score: 0          

Haiku #5201

*grope* [deleted] I'd
     prefer a yacht, though you've got
fantastic cleavage.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5202

Sure. Make a public
     spectacle and treat the kid
like a convict? No.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5203

I don't think rapists
     should get second or third or
any more chances.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5204

Other than that, you're
     right, I don't see too many
distinctive titles.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5205

Don't be surprised if
     this rhetoric surfaces
One night stand action.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5206

If an insurer
     charges more than that, there's no
point to buying that.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5207

make him switch to whole
     wheat Sorry, but I am not
the man you speak of.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5208

I do this pretty
     often and wallow in scotch
and regret. Good luck.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5209

In fact, if she was
     president right now what do
you think would happen?

Score: 0          

Haiku #5210

[deleted] You mean
     like the one the Patriot
Act had to go through?

Score: 0          

Haiku #5211

Holy fuck that sucked.
     I don't ever want to touch
Flex again. Good point.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5212

PRETTY SURE HE'S LIKE
     A RAPIST OR STALKER OR
MAD FAN OR SOMETHING.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5213

LOL REAL GAY
     I want to save you. DUDE CAN
WE MASTURBATE NOW.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5214

Those things aren't any
     better than chance when it comes
to accuracy.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5215

Shit like that drives me
     away from your site, not just
your advertising.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5216

Odds are, nobody
     is going to hire someone
who's strung out on drugs.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5217

The worst was probably
     when I took mushrooms that weren't
what I thought they were.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5218

The road to Hell is
     paved with good intentions Quit
watching so much porn.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5219

Our hierarchical
     federated system is
actually doomed to fail.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5220

I hope they get charged
     with murder but I guess that's
too much to ask for.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5221

Sorry, but it blows
     my mind how often this is
the first thing mentioned.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5222

I'm drawn on eating
     meat, the taking of a life
is what concerns me.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5223

Good. Maybe I can
     finally get some work done
when they shut it down.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5224

Raid someone's house, there
     will be SOMETHING illegal
in there guaranteed.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5225

And the Bible tells
     Christians to close themselves off
from new evidence.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5226

Most women are not
     attracted to a man who
is shorter than her.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5227

Here you are again
     with this music snobbery...
get over yourself...

Score: 0          

Haiku #5228

Doesn't always mean
     that's who they actually are, just
who they wish they were.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5229

I'm very big on
     stereotypes by the way.
UGH, not this again.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5230

It's a cunning plan
     to get back at the world, but
spare America.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5231

That'll be a death
     penalty, usually. Sad.
These are sad photos.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5232

Shit, do you even
     need a nice home if money
isn't your lifestyle?

Score: 0          

Haiku #5233

Then i bolted when
     one of the guys motioned me
over to join them.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5234

It's an exposure
     to say the least. Super cute!
And very sexy!

Score: 0          

Haiku #5235

Well Russia has used
     nukes at least five times to seal
deep water oil leaks.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5236

It was from behind
     glass but I managed to shield
out the background light.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5237

Your handle proves you
     are, indeed, American.
My condolences.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5238

Still never grabbed her
     hand, but that definitely
looks worse, I'll give you.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5239

Mixed people are not
     defined as one black parent
and one white parent.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5240

You're right, China is
     doing something about it.
But no where else is.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5241

Its what plants crave Most
     popular retro rap was
also terrible.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5242

I feel like Flea is
     very creative with his
bass lines, however.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5243

What if taxes were
     raised and more help was offered
to single parents?

Score: 0          

Haiku #5244

Man i wish i had
     access to more pasta shapes
at my grocery store.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5245

I live in central
     PA now, where some lakes allow
swimming and some don't.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5247

You must've taken
     that subtlety advice from
yesterday to heart.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5248

No, but the deer would
     probably kick both your asses,
is all I'm saying.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5249

[deleted] Well, yeah,
     everything you say about
media is true.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5250

A lot of people
     I've talked to aren't interested
in learning Python.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5251

Plus, must they talk. So.
     Loud?! Yes, I'll have the salmon,
but, how is it cooked?

Score: 0          

Haiku #5252

He stops and points. Hmmm.
     How would I lead a little
girl out of the store?

Score: 0          

Haiku #5253

The pictures exist,
     but the cameras were above
average eye level.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5254

The tips of the hands
     would move through SPACE faster, but
TIME is the constant.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5255

Building a huge clock
     doesn't make a worm hole, if
that's what you're asking.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5256

picard out my dog
     already acts more 'humane'
than humans themselves.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5257

if you can't find fun
     places to ride in the South
you're doing it wrong.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5258

Instead of screaming
     'stop it!' get a fucking gun
and shoot the damn thing.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5259

I saw and got jokes
     that flew way over my head
when I was a kid.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5260

All that extra stuff
     costs relatively little,
and sells more bodies.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5261

You cannot control
     where your shit goes once it is
on the internet.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5262

Sorry people, you
     HAVE to buy fresh produce if
you want fresh produce.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5264

If you don't see why
     you should have, seek therapy
for self confidence.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5265

These recordings are
     freaking me the hell out, but
I can't stop listening.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5267

Regardless, this *does*
     get posted to ideas
at least once a week.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5268

i would doubt that you'd
     get a proper dose that way,
though i could be wrong.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5269

In fact, I believe
     the video indicates
two minutes elapsed.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5270

You still have to get
     up to speed if you're aligned
but stationary.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5271

They were told to leave
     town or else and had to pack
up and leave that night.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5272

You gotta love this.
     *This* is just how hazardous
deep sea drilling is.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5273

It's just the trailer,
     which was already posted
online yesterday.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5274

I live in a place
     where the water supply is
always in excess.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5275

And roosters are LOUD!
     Also, make sure to filter
their water somehow.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5276

Personally, I think
     there should be no distinction
with regards to race.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5277

If someone chooses
     drugs over college, they are
punished as it is.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5278

The girl needs to do
     whatever makes her feel safe,
and comfortable.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5279

Happened to my mom.
     (the label of her sweater
while taking it off).

Score: 0          

Haiku #5280

The people living
     there will be lucky if there's
even rubble left.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5281

Um, this still appears
     to be soccer (not football)
so nope still boring.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5282

Guatemala Clothes
     stolen, including camera.
All my stuff taken.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5283

Every knee shall bow,
     every tong confess of his
delicious pasta.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5284

This World Cup has been
     full of surprises so far.
I love it! No doubt.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5285

I usually don't
     notice mine unless a room
is super quiet.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5286

Those ways of thinking
     have poisoned American
discourse to this day.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5287

Whereabouts in St
     Louis? If he's still around,
I'll buy him a beer.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5288

You'll love Dragon Age.
     Did you hate it? Then this game
might not be for you.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5289

So you think there are
     more important matters than
"waking people up"?!

Score: 0          

Haiku #5290

Mind you, this was all
     also before the US was
even in the war.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5291

And I could be wrong,
     but Marines were the only
force to take them back.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5292

Why do you assume
     he's a fag because he can
remember the time?

Score: 0          

Haiku #5293

But what we can say
     is that people get one chance
for something like this.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5294

She loves side stepping
     laws, just look at her email
at yahoo issue.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5295

Either they will wait,
     or they will get impatient
and just buy the book.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5296

is this referring
     to clowns being raped, or clowns
doing the raping?

Score: 0          

Haiku #5297

nah, it's just the first
     thing I thought of that no one
else could come up with.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5298

That appears to be
     exactly what the teen did.
And are you fourteen?

Score: 0          

Haiku #5299

I am personally
     with Rogers, which is the same
network as fido.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5300

This may all be by
     design, but the effect does
not work well for me.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5301

This lifestyle requires
     knowledge and a fit body
much more than money.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5302

Uncle Sam is broke.
     Short of money from heaven,
what do you propose?

Score: 0          

Haiku #5303

Great viewpoint to share.
     [deleted] Try running through
the tutorial.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5304

So, do you Dad knows
     Dexter Morgan? Depends on
the company. Ford?

Score: 0          

Haiku #5305

That's how tattoos SHOULD
     look, instead of the decals
people normally get.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5306

This is a great post,
     given that we all hate fat
people and women.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5307

If she really thought
     you were nice, you wouldn't get
the "nothing" answer.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5308

I like seeing gains
     in efficiency, means things
are getting better!

Score: 0          

Haiku #5309

I will not let you
     trick me into looking like
the weird one again.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5310

But it is a great
     movie just not what I would
call realistic.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5311

A resolution
     doesn't *need* her name, so it's
odd you added it.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5312

That is, what about
     the freedom to own what you
make of your own time?

Score: 0          

Haiku #5313

We could say Ron Paul
     has a consistent record
we can look back on.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5314

Just because you aren't
     very good at it doesn't
mean you aren't a troll.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5315

You broke up with her
     for the reasons that people
should get together!

Score: 0          

Haiku #5316

If we do that our
     economy is going
to tank totally.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5318

The relationship
     with the person who blew them
away rarely lasts.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5319

He was innocent!
     This is a bullshit frame job
we're witnessing, man!

Score: 0          

Haiku #5320

That's statistical
     analysis of a sparse
data set for you.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5321

How's that little guy
     going to survive without
some meat and veggies?

Score: 0          

Haiku #5322

If it's not ideal
     for everyone, it is not
ideal period.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5323

[deleted] What, no
     Half Life? And no Hugh Laurie
or Edward Norton.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5324

Would you believe that's
     my first attempt at carving
something in leather?

Score: 0          

Haiku #5325

We humans are not
     always at our best, even
when we are prepared.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5326

No it is not just
     cause for abduction charges
and police theatrics.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5327

Hopefully it will
     be as awesome as I hoped
the first one would be.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5328

[deleted] Except
     not and now he gets to stalk
off the pitch in shame.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5329

:D In my city
     there's one place where the sign says
"Bike Lane, no parking".

Score: 0          

Haiku #5330

I did a "jungle
     survival training course" back
when I was younger.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5331

HOLY FUCK! That's me
     in the background Come to Maine.
We have nice... _lobsters_.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5332

What's important here
     is that 'Bloody Sunday' is
just one of many.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5333

Alabama just
     recently freed itself from
such (to a degree).

Score: 0          

Haiku #4564

"Hunky Scientist"
     sounds like a hilarious
feature comedy.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5334

How much. How can you
     be SO bloody unlucky
AND incompetent.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5335

He didn't. The person
     you see coming back in is
the mother. Look close.

Score: 0          

Haiku #5336

There's rarely a shot
     on goal and even rarer
is an actual goal.

Score: 0          


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Page updated on Saturday Dec 17, 2022 08:00:30 PM PDT.

A Cyrus snafu.