Reddit Haikus

Which park would this be?
     I might be able to go
there and catch me one!

A lot depends on
     how your body chemistry
reacts to the drug.

Agreed, all you need
     is a screwdriver. EDIT:
Or a small wrench. Nope.

Just back up your stuff
     so a sudden failure won't
destroy your whole life!

Congratulations,
     you have found our most famous
and prolific troll.

Shit. Hilarious,
     I have definitely done
this myself as well.

I will have to go
     there on a Monday and do
the same. Where's the Pabst?

I don't think one needs
     to be left behind to make
room for the other.

The arranged 5v5 queue
     is not where you go to play
competitive 5s.

Also, do they not
     believe God has a master
plan for all of us?

I'll see if I can
     compile some highlights, and then
my replies for Chaz.

I have been in tears
     since having the vitriol
thrown at me last night.

This one over here
     is going up you narrow
fucking Irish ass.

Growing up I went
     to United Church, and was
briefly a Mormon.

I like to see their
     reactions during certain
critical moments.

The best thing to do
     is to tell her EXACTLY
what you just told us.

Big boobs are heavy.
     They cause a lot of back pain.
They get in the way.

I think gasoline
     in the garden would get me
in some deep trouble.

I always just liked
     the taste of coffee, so no,
I'll stay addicted.

If you can work out
     doing something you like, all
the power to you.

Fuck your god. When you
     made a reservation, you
agreed to these terms.

But after last night,
     I really appreciate
the advice. Thank you.

Other sites stealing
     their content makes it that much
harder to do so.

If it's in English
     and you plan to do the same,
you have another.

I'm still a virgin
     in the conventional sense,
but not in this sense.

They're pointless goofy
     extras only a hardcore
fan would care about.

[deleted] First read
     then vote Idiots No shit.
You could well be right...

He said "Well?" "It is
     my job to stand here and watch
over the front end.

Nice cash cow if you
     can find clients dumb enough
to subscribe to it.

Or something like that,
     since there are several chapters
that wear black armor.

Like I said before,
     para bar is doing things
that no one else does.

I guess I was trying
     to say people will still look
out for each other.

Is this the person
     women turn to for advice
and insight on life...?

[deleted] This is
     one of the most fucked up things
I have ever read.

Even if I do
     in fact agree with you. Quick!
Kill the shirt with fire!

Is America
     just littered with abandoned
kittens or something?

Truth; the butter just
     slides down your gullet while you
have to chew bagels.

Can you give a more
     exact date? How old is "old"?
A year? A decade?

If it were just me,
     it would have taken more time
than I had to spare.

I've made Boston Cream
     Pie cupcakes before but I've
never seen cookies!

Is there any chance
     that this could be the Background
image or something?

It brought back some nice
     memories of my belly
shelf 1st pregnancy.

And you think they would
     not take the bike path if there
would be one right there?

I did not run out
     into the streets, unlike some
east coasters I know.

Like your boss that thinks
     his better than you so talks
down to you daily.

you should come and see
     for your self if we are who
you think us to be.

I couldn't create
     anything as beautiful
as that if I tried.

Exactly, now lets
     try to remember one ad
that was on a shirt.

[deleted] Explain
     how changing the vader scene
gains him more money?

Makes sense. I figured
     as much, but thought it might be
best to clarify.

Thanks! Yea kinda sad
     I got negative karma
on this but oh well.

I just saw a flash
     and then he was wobbling, trying
to control his bike.

finish the night off
     with a drink at concept nice
little basement bar.

Here is to hoping
     for a hurricane that can
make it past the coast.

The relatively
     low skill to luck ratio
doesn't bother you?

Alcohol cancelled
     out the benefit of friends
trying to cheer me up.

I live for that day!
     Easiest decision I'll
never get to make.

I'm a gay woman
     though, so, whatever, doesn't
really impact me.

I was at the ripe
     age of ten years old the first
time I grew a bear.

Ask them to prove their
     assertions, then dissect their
answers logically.

[deleted] Uhh, what?
     We know how gravity works,
we just don't know why.

I think a little
     bit of my brain just melted.
Oh, you do for sure.

In buying a home,
     we want everything to be
on its proper place.

Fair enough. (does seem
     to have a funky effect
on my heart (-beat) though.

When you love them back
     you will geek out about how
amazing they are.

If you lose karma
     on the internet, you lose
karma in Real Life!

She had instructed
     the hospital to not let
ANYONE see him.

But its really no
     harm to you allowing prints
be available.

If you have any
     better ideas, then by
all means, let us know.

But the company
     should protect it's employees
right to privacy.

And my bus didn't show
     up, nor did the following
two scheduled buses.

Maybe a little
     bit more if you've got old spare
parts lying around.

Thanks, Jillian. Weekends?
     My advisor convinced me
that these didn't exist.

She sounds hectic man,
     good luck keeping her around.
Uh, no not really.

If your arguments
     are flawed, it does not mean you
are a bad person.

I will let you know
     the result after I get
out of surgery.

Check what you're eating!
     Especially your greens and DON'T
drink milk for a while.

I am not quite sure
     where you got "better safe than
sorry" from my post.

From the discussion
     there it seems like `base` just is
too monolithic.

oh you Isn't it?
     I had to read it twice. Then,
I gave the slow nod.

I finally broke
     down in the shower (didn't work
until noon that day).

Weed is all mental
     man, and the mind can be trained
if you work at it.

But the way you shill
     for your wife's union, you'll just
never know it. Wrong.

If you don't know where
     you're going (for anything),
leave early. It worked.

:D I get that, but
     sometimes its nice to just win.
Think I've got these right.

People just don't like
     to hear that this is really
the way it happens.

So I suppose you
     are predicting that he will
reject the offer.

Except for the fact
     that you can buy pirated
items for far less.

They're showing disgust
     and some of their comments can
be seen as attacks.

Either you like him
     for who he is or you don't.
If not, don't date him.

Yes, our team is bad
     (though nobody here cares when
we lose to Haiti).

I would only care
     if you decided to wage
war because of it.

You can probably guess
     what I ended up doing
once I realized it.

Also, getting out
     there in the world and making
new friends helps big time.

I know they're only
     doing their job, but just take
no for an answer!

By that logic you
     can say my penis affects
other people's health.

I assume these are
     the newest photos showing
how you look right now.

I'd be down to try....
     These are amazing thank you!
Which boat were you on?

So for me, the game
     is pretty neutral (not good,
but not bad either).

Then science was all
     'hey, I have some answers but
not all. But I'm trying'.

Socially Awesome
     Penguin: Gets laid. Physically,
he is not a nerd.

Thanks! I had a look
     at your post, we are very
similar in shape.

Learn songs. Jam a LOT.
     You sound more than ready, just
unsure of yourself.

Carry it on long
     enough and you're another
kind of Zionist.

Let these people move
     on with their lives, don't keep them
in refugee camps.

So we must accept
     the circumstances and make
do in our new land.

I further researched
     that at the time and it was
true from what I found.

I'll let you know if
     you're right, though. Have modern roads.
No one has a car.

Thanks for the input!
     Sure. I'd also like replays
and spectator mode.

I know, so don't try
     to suspend your disbelief,
your brain might fall out.

I didn't know that you
     wanted me to tell you want
you wanted to do.

If the larger team
     incurs no deaths, the teams will
remain uneven.

Eh, my keywords were
     different and did not return
anything useful.

Christians here serve free
     hamburger lunches, soda
and chips included.

It's not even half
     as funny without hearing
Charlie Day scream it.

I made sure to keep
     cooperative games on
hand for this reason.

Requiring tokens
     to play alternate game modes
is straight up stupid.

[deleted] Probably
     only off on another
fucking holiday!

Shaving my head was
     the best thing I've ever done
for my appearance.

In fact some even
     have British dye transfer prints
which command big bucks.

Although I suggest
     that if you want penises,
visit chat roulette.

At previous jobs
     people would always haggle
for a cheaper deal.

That, or in New York
     City. You have got to be
fucking kidding me.

When I ask for three
     days of space I usually
only needed two.

Dark matter is not
     the simplest and most data
consistent theory.

The blob of cells can't
     think, doesn't have a brain yet,
doesn't have a heart.

But Metallica
     is a piece of our culture,
and should be preserved.

oh, what a fun life
     I lead! Backwoods New York is
the south of the north...

The obvious "why"
     comes next and just tell him you
would like to move on.

[deleted] Shaw don't
     give a shit about tiny
shareholders like you.

As my previous
     links illustrate, piracy
affects music sales.

That does somewhat help,
     but it can still be a pain
to remove fully.

I aim to please You're
     obviously hanging out
in the wrong alleys.

[deleted] Isn't
     this what starts the whole zombie
revolution thing...

[deleted] Maybe
     the supercomputer could
be my opponent?

Drove over it, backed
     up, drove over it again,
and backed up again.

I don't do freelance
     work for the mom and pop store
down the road at $20/hour.

You are driving down
     the road and the engine starts
knocking and smoking.

Odd, using wireless
     wired or both? Take my money.
Give me your stories.

REALLY bad... If there
     is ANYTHING we can do.
Anything at all.

[deleted] That sounds
     like a shitty suicide
cult to me. Same here.

I voted for him.
     I hope he wins. Is there more
by this guy out there?

Anyone who claims
     otherwise is a fucking
deluded moron.

People like YOU who
     somehow think they have figured
out every answer!

Have a good day" type
     conversations that exist
all over the world.

It's required that you
     love Obama, or you hate
the United States?

I was wondering
     what all those helicopters
were hovering over.

He runs with power,
     he runs with speed, and he runs
with agility.

The only challenge
     is that Farsi has changed, too,
in two thousand years.

Always on her phone.
     Fuck if I'm going to fight
for your attention.

for a pretty good
     price to Other than getting
one custom made, no.

You can always make
     hard exams even without
asking advanced math.

Right after that you
     can only see a red blob
where the head should be.

Again it was great
     and I began to wonder
about clubs and stuff.

[deleted] Same here.
     No idea what number
is in the circles.

I have the biggest
     problem with the tendons on
my middle fingers.

That is some really
     neat work, and the guy gets paid
to screw off at work!

My wife gives me crap
     about it all the time but
i never get lost.

Hate Obama, hate
     Palin, hate Perry, hate this,
hate that, hate congress.

Good luck- and you can
     always go to the doctor
if you are worried!

Unless the light is
     fairly dim to begin with,
then you'll still see red.

I usually wear
     boots with jeans, oxfords with slacks,
and runners with shorts.

But before the mid
     twentieth century there
wasn't such a word.

Penetration is
     penetration, no matter
how he defines it.

I miss this. I would
     like you to rethink labeling
fluoride as toxic.

even though he's lived
     every day of his life, by
his choice, as a girl.

You think? What part did
     I get wrong? Of course, it IS
possible I'm wrong.

And a glass mustache
     is not art either my friend.
It's a novelty.

These items also
     help survive ability
quite a bit as well.

There are even worse
     atrocities IMO than
what you have mentioned.

You see a demand,
     and you provide a supply!
Capitalism!

naked women look
     better in pairs So many
A's, so little time.

All in all, probably
     none of the games are really
all that noteworthy.

If you let the sex
     go, you will become great friends.
And that will be it.

I sorted it out
     by writing myself a check
from my credit card.

No, but I support
     the government feeding those
who can't afford it.

LOL, I don't
     think the sharpie dick itself
was an accident.

what hats do you have?
     Thanks everyone for taking
the time to reply.

Reading the manga
     fills in everything around
that time period.

That episode was
     extremely disappointing.
What a complete mess.

Forgiveness doesn't
     mean I would ever *trust* them
again, however.

That light built in just
     doesn't have enough power
for good flowering.

May you have many
     fat children and your life be
filled with happiness.

[deleted] I heard
     pillows are great for airflow!
One of my favorites!

Also, I wouldn't
     worry to much about not
having licenses.

so i hope better
     [deleted] Dollar menu
food is a ripoff.

Full knowledge of maps.
     Diamond to Masters: Don't know,
haven't gotten there.

I'm an amazon
     prime member so I buy shit
from them all the time.

I'll definitely
     be checking them out as well.
And I won't forget.

This page does nothing
     to dispell this, other than
to claim otherwise.

Whatever Allah
     wished to make clear, He made clear
with certain knowledge.

"I'm sorry your name
     is Derek" LOL Thanks.
Glad you enjoy them.

When this happens, do
     you want to message you links?
Now, about Witch hunts....

Keep a sharp eye out
     for these kind of women, they're
worth their weight in gold.

I'm with you on this.
     I think two or three of their
albums are better.

Do you need a hug?
     you're one of those people who
would decide for them.

The details should shed
     some light on whether they were
overdoing it.

But it had to be
     at just the right moment or
else it wouldn't work.

You can't karma whore
     any more, you can only
submit text based posts.

There was a story
     going around years ago
that he killed himself.

Did you have many,
     many security guards
walking around too?