Reddit Haikus

im writing this from
     the Thursday morning service
right now. go with god.

[deleted] It would
     be awesome to have this set
up on a smart car.

What are you basing
     this off of to say that there
shouldn't be combat?

Do you want the truth
     or the same old bullshit you've
heard a thousand times?

Advice about some
     trivial bullshit that you
should handle YOURSELF?

Mess around with those
     advanced option check boxes
and see what you get.

Causal, nice, relaxed.
     Those are pleasurable. Pain,
agony, sorrow.

Nothing in human
     capability is left
to be discovered.

Daddy needs to earn
     back all your college savings.
[deleted] Hello?

San Andreas was
     good about allowing you
to cram it in there.

The result would be
     clear, and you're either given
the million, or not.

Edit: The problem
     is that our drunk driving laws
are ridiculous.

What am I missing?
     or does the time show the time
since their last edit?

I would drive the shit
     out of a train if the job
was available.

to my then girlfriend.
     The damn kids on my lawn will
hate me when I'm old.

Fuck, need a Xanax
     now just thinking about it.
Yep. Just more gooey.

I'd open up VATS
     and put a clip into it's
wings just to be sure.

i would have brought them
     back out after bringing them
in in the middle.

Lots of people who
     have been playing for a while
suck at spy. Like me.

Usually the sound
     alone from that thing will make
most people back off.

Get a Charlie card
     month pass or weekly one if
you are tight on cash.

They have a little
     machine that works the same way
as the above gates.

However, *if* they'll
     ever reach production, I'd
love to check them out.

Shaw gambled on their
     belief that people didn't want
to be in contracts.

well, I figured if
     I could find the guy, he'd know
who took the picture.

This man has very
     noble reasons for serving
his country like what?

Those mangoes came from
     walmart (so they kind of sucked)
I refuse to share.

I thought critical
     depth was *almost* as awesome
as Twisted Metal.

We finally called
     the judge and were shuttled back
into the court room.

I discuss all those
     things with people all the time.
Several times a week.

Last year the very
     first snow fall of the year was
November 7th.

One solution would
     be to scale the damage ups
based on item type.

I'd like to think there
     was something awesome coming
but I doubt it. Sure!

Hey, why is the cork
     half way down the bottle on
the far left? Oh wait.....

I only had dreams
     where I was "still at work" when
I worked in restaurants.

My greatest concern
     would be that they find a path
through life that suits them.

I just remember
     messing around with Bryce 3D
and it seems like that.

Once the money leaves
     the country, there is no way
to get it back in.

Nothing close to what
     I was hoping for, but i've
learned to enjoy it.

You can't see, I know,
     at least thank god for making
you an atheist!

Stop acting like spoiled,
     know it all brats, you know shit
like the rest of us.

I'd be interested
     in what goes in with her where
the sun doesn't shine.

Why are they so small?
     My brother is a massive
sleep talker. *Massive*.

but were you actually?
     Plumbing projects are always
bigger than they look.

Lacking heart, effort,
     and hunger? Not anymore.
We're ready to go.

The best option though
     is alot of graveyard tech
that can win or mill.

But the deck I HOPE
     you build, and I think could be
really awesome fun.

Although, when I typed
     the post I figured it might
come across that way.

I wanna see him
     do the "I got your nose" trick
on a toddler next!

I'm not sure about
     Comp. Third floor T has the "Nerd
Nook", lots of plugs there.

After the zombie
     apocalypse, sure, by all
means make use of it.

Why do people line
     up like sheep when the line next
to them is open?

I can tell from here...
     oh nevermind we figured
that out already.

This place is not hell,
     you are making it that way.
This is life, live it.

I certainly didn't
     mind the replaying of "Did
I Let You Know" though.

i hate that bastard...
     Seems like a roundabout way
to get a green floor.

It took me a while
     to pick up the book again.
But, it gets better!

Like with this latest
     patch because I lost a few
earlier this week?

I would recommend
     trying other campaign settings
to see what fits best.

[deleted] Actually
     I found this one pretty good
even for a fake.

Yep, I've seen a guy
     throw away a crate of live
ones at a Safeway.

What the hell is wrong
     with these people ignoring
gender and cases?!

I'm a mean mom though,
     and told him to suck it up
and get over it.

But then I'm not one
     to be amused by many
commercials these days.

I really started
     to miss them when my daughter
came into my life.

It make no attempt
     at hiding what it's gonna
be used for No need.

Cars in front of me
     creep me the fuck out, I feel
ya bro. You're damn right.

Get some new glasses.
     Try Tory Burch! She makes great
inexpensive frames.

Hours later as I'm
     watching tv in my room
I hear "what the hell".

Yes this could be used
     to farm but the player still
has to do some work.

I had a daughter
     get herself a makeover
with a new hairstyle.

For now, though, I just
     man it up and shave my face
every other day.

It was nothing but
     vague platitudes anyway.
lame, lame, lame, OH SHIT!!!

My runs are getting
     longer, although I do like
watching the sun rise.

Been a long time since
     I've read it but the movie
quote has stuck with me.

I really need more
     info on what sorts of themes
you and your friends like.

The day his child, Bart
     was killed by a corgi dog
in Austin, Texas.

The 4th panel
     is probably when you busted
and that's why it hurt.

have always really
     liked your body and package.
good photo of both.

I agree, i was
     offering an explanation
on why they are cheap.

There is no limit
     to the amount of good you
can do in this world.

How long before they're
     tapping into the system
to track your car? Thanks!

Thanks! I always get
     confused on these generic
interview questions.

It's still interesting
     just as a lot of fiction
books are interesting.

I could care less if
     he actually did all the things
he said. dude, who cares?

And in the "special
     requests" section put, "Write out:
I know you're a thief!"

I get weird feelings
     from certain metals, silver
in particular.

Is there such a thing
     as a violent pacifist?
Screw Red. No big deal.

True story, that guy
     sucked my cock repeatedly
in high school. So true.

Boyfriend yelled, "DOG STOP
     BITING ME!" and kicked my leg
that was next to him.

I've found my hair fades
     'prettier' with henna than
with chemical dye.

Is the UN really
     trying to take over the world
in a one world gov.?

It has a start state
     and a finish state and can
have states in between.

Wait, what? I don't... Look,
     it's fine if you want to be
critical of faith.

Or so they can turn
     into the empty, hateful
husk you seem to be?

How do you mean "no
     one is actually intending
to do anything"?

I was wondering
     why I'd not see his name pop
up, he has been great.

Nintendo themselves
     have stressed that the game must be
competent at 2d.

I don't really know,
     I've never parsed the concept
so finely before.

If you use a large
     cog in the back, then you will
not go very fast.

And since the author
     isn't around anymore,
things would not work out.

Give people's minds time
     to find a reasonable doubt
if there could be one.

You obviously
     haven't met any seven
year old's recently.

That's a well done Grand
     Cherokee. Now you can off
road in luxury!

You definitely
     should go to the symphony
on waterfront park.

That was meant to help
     dislodge the reality
that credit is slow.

He didn't stand he just
     looked like something terrible
had awaken him.

It makes me want too
     reply to there post with one
or to corrections.

I've known the owners
     for quite a long time, and yes
I've tasted their goods.

Your dad might be gay.
     Are you gay? No wait, you live
in California?

That is for the young
     and stupid, unless you are
SELLING junk to them.

timing and intent
     are completely lost in text.
Wife made me do it.

Focus on this year
     and quit counting your chickens
before the eggs hatch.

I only see one
     or two shots in there that looks
well lit and exposed.

Are you telling me
     you used your skill to make them
look bad on purpose?

[Returns with a cart
     full of strawberries] "So, you
life strawberries huh?

Right there. People who
     say things you don't like should be
shot, is what you said.

I will have to go
     check out their shop when I am
in Copenhagen.

You're supposed to drop
     sets as you stall more often.
October 25th.

**S U B R E
     D D I C T I O
N** You can do math.

And he's going back
     to uni soon, he doesn't
have his own place still.

By asking them you
     are giving them the option
to say yes or no.

As good as Android
     is if it's not what she wants
she'll be unhappy.

Maybe that'll help,
     you'll need to do more research
than what I've offered.

As someone who used
     to commute, this is clearly
what he was playing.

It doesn't matter
     which direction you're going,
it's hard work, and pain.

We give food rather
     than money, because the food
is truly needed.

Would have liked to see
     the questions, but that viewer
thing is too buggy.

However, if you
     get a custom tent, it will
be made in the US.

Paying child support?
     School supplies? College? What is
your motivation?

I once had a great
     idea for one but didn't
know how to do it.

I stick to padded
     bras from time to time mainly
because its cheaper.

This kid beat me up
     on the beach after I was
talking to his girl.

He then proceeded
     to curl up right next to me
and fell back to sleep.

Push based systems can
     be nicer than polling, but
let's not put on airs.

They would have cleaned up
     if they had opened one here
after Katrina.

I was in college.
     This occurred shortly after
September 11th.

There was a window
     behind me and a porch light
outside that window.

So, I never thought
     you meant you were brought to tears
by sadness. Oh well.

Yeah, the kilt is not
     worn enough, but they are damned
expensive to buy.

This is a losing
     battle and you will not win.
Get a new girlfriend.

Maybe you should've
     challenged them to a water
balloon fight instead.

She was like "Oh, wait,
     so that wasn't your penis
I was looking at?"

I would hope there'd be
     one for Sweden in the not
too distant future.

that's spot on I want
     to buy honeycomb because
I like to eat it.

I must have not thought
     about it the way it should
have been thought about.

I had lots of fun
     in my sound reinforcement
and stage lighting days.

This is perfectly
     understandable as God
likes hyperbole.

I've never been, but
     the "dead men tell no tales" line
make me think of it.

As far as we know
     he took our money and did
who knows what with it.

Given that, I may
     just avoid some capitols
and go with the flow.

Your neighbors give you
     brownies, and you're calling them
"passive aggressive"?

I said oh he's fine,
     and he goes heh I thought he'd
be in jail by now.

Quite disappointing
     as they've only let one group
in this week so far.

I like you, a lot.
     [deleted] You think the wife
would have moved away.

The other thing is
     that we can't defeat any
army anywhere.

So, the hands of our
     forces were tied, and will be
tied in the future.

Actual quote aside,
     let's take the analogy
out a bit further.

A lot of people
     were leaving really rude things
and I read it wrong.

Just tack "Factory"
     onto whatever you've got
until it's unique.

I kept telling her
     to stop and she kept laughing
and kept doing it.

Oh well! oh my god
     i've been waiting to hear that.
i can breathe again!

She's MY fantasy
     engineer /Peter Griffen
Wow, what a great find!

FOR SURE. But as far
     as dating goes, I would be
worried about it.

EDIT: Or you mean
     that Lorentz might be broken
at high energies?

Every decision
     you make should be focused on
improving those goals.

Bastards. If I knew
     I could have starved them to death
I would have done that.

The city Police?
     The State for releasing him
early on parole?

But I figured I'd
     provide the explanation
above for context.

I read the complete
     Night Dawn's Trilogy and loved
the crap out of it.

If i was there i'd
     have your back, glad to hear you
stood up for yourself.

*IDENTITY HAWK
     What's the matter, got some sand
in your vagina?

When she asks why just
     say, "There are all of these hairs
all over the place.

Dude, that is NOT what
     opportunity cost means.
Are you retarded?

Oh hey! DON'T YOU LOOK
     AT HER LIKE THAT!!" The world needs
more people like you.

Wait... I thought they backed
     down from asking us also
to lift the blockade.

my thoughts exactly.
     "lower status" who the fuck
does OP think he is?

Well, as a teacher,
     I'm sure the parents let you
know that it's your fault.

I don't know if there
     is anything much we can
tell you then, sorry.

NOT TOO FUCKING BAD
     in the fantasy booking
department, my friend.

carbon is different
     from metal and comes with its
own set of problems.

The first month or two
     may suck as you adjust, but
then it gets better.

Does something happen
     to earth's gravitational
pull in the future?

[deleted] This song
     is definitely the high
point of the album.

do we drop living
     standard or do we fucking
stand up for ourselves?

In fact, I often
     ask for a frozen piece (it's
hot in Florida).

Glad to know I am
     not the only person out
there that gets these text.

Huge difference from what
     actually happened and removes
the moral hazard.

E damage buff is
     sleeper OP, no one has those
kind of ratios.

"I know you say you're
     straight but that's what I thought too
until I got raped".

Agreed. Want water?
     Don't live in fucking Texas.
Learn from our mistakes?

The way it was used
     however was not correct
since thunk is a noise.

My Five Guys drink cup
     and Dry erase markers So,
just a panda bear?

My winter gloves are
     gauntlet style, but any good
set of gloves will help.

Could be I don't know!
     Stupid Diet!! I'm a big
beer drinker my self!

Other than that, you
     learn how to expand or lose
every single game.

[Here is a comic
     for you that explains the need
for savings quite well.

I do have Steam set
     to remember my password,
so I guess that's it.

The down arrow is
     for comments that add nothing
to the discussion.

Also it was buy
     one get one free at the store,
so that helps the cost.

In fact, I'm well known
     for "dressing like a bum" when
I do not need to.