Reddit Haikus

My shepherd husky
     makes that same face every time
she does something wrong.

If you would have known
     your history you would have known
this was nothing new.

I'd have to see some
     stats on atheists being
denied employment.

Get out of here you
     heretic, do you even
fucking ninja rope?

Most people I know
     only go to yelp to write
negative reviews.

The consistency
     and carry I got from them
was incredible.

That's exactly how
     I like my rock hard, throbbing
cock to be played with!!!!

Pretty fantastic.
     They're about as good as flats
are going to get.

But seriously,
     if you're a man, just leave her.
She's a piece of trash.

I'm simply saying
     we have no definitive
proof it will, nor when.

Holy shit I had
     to scroll this far down to find
the voice of reason.

Eastern Europe does
     not deserve a chance to get
jobs in Germany?

Playing Atari
     on a black and white TV
with knobs on it. Yay!

We don't do advice
     about specific people
or situations.

Not everyone does.
     Same with them mounted sideways
beside the rear wheel.

Just saying. i am
     in a pretty good place right
now a year ago?

not so much so life
     is definitely getting
better all the time.

That's the whole statement.
     Ah ok, thanks for sharing!
Thanks for the contest!

Barring that, he could
     have also left out the first
line all together.

I might make a track
     anyway just for practice
though, what was the theme?

tunnel snakes rule! Why?
     [deleted] Isn't that what
Stockholm Syndrome is?

Jesus Christ. We are
     dealing with a genuine
sociopath here.

And that should be seen
     as an incredibly good
thing all on its own.

It surely doesn't
     appreciate it it would
just regenerate...

As if it's easy
     to stand up when someone has
you in side control.

I could even pay
     peasants from other regions
to come settle mine.

I'd like Earthworm Jim
     better than Mortal Kombat,
but then, never played.

English have bad teeth.
     And besides, I like giving
people what they want.

I totally get
     the desire to cancel
at the last minute.

I guess it won't long
     for long, still living at home.
Shouldn't it be 81x7=567?

Do you understand?
     It's kind of a pain, but we're
handling it quite well.

I'll be sure to pass
     on this wisdom to others.
Thank you for this post!

Maybe we should yell
     "CAR CRASH!" instead, people love
watching car crashes.

You also wouldn't
     lose any space doing this.
That's very... purple.

He is a party
     rapper, and I will never
see him as "Trap Wiz".

There was a lot more
     involved than just carrying
the landscaping stone.

Explain your choices.
     Compare them to existing
versions of these decks.

I despise guys who
     feel like they are "gatekeepers"
into geek culture.

Indeed. These adds don't
     make me laugh; they piss me off.
These adds are racist.

In fact I went there
     for several years and I don't
even read comics.

Success! I believe
     the smoke monster is also
very persuasive.

I think all of them
     would have been worth their own post!
If you ever do.

And the parts that where
     left behind grew really fast.
Even in my scar...

I got ya covered.
     Just make a random comment
like, hey this looks great.

Should I have slandered
     his wedding and who he is
because of his past?

I am a native
     Spanish speaker. Have you had
ear sex recently?

Not the most detailed,
     but it's hard to do this from
my phone lol.

My point is: **LAWYER
     UP**. It doesn't matter if
you are respectful.

I guess some people
     don't like the lose more once time
goes on mechanic?

Perhaps its because
     we feel as if a store is
like a person's home.

"Thanks a lot," Kid groaned
     as he brought himself to his
feet and stretched his neck.

I loved armour lock
     on infection White lines are
on most of my bolts.

I've ordered it through
     prime twice and haven't gotten
anything with it.

I thought that was true
     too, though I still thought Dig would
be good despite it.

A "that was funny".
     Sigh. I love sleepers because
no socks! I hate socks.

Sigh. I love sleepers
     because no socks! I hate socks.
So does my baby.

HUGE SUCCESS Being
     too poor to pay you bills is
not a strategy.

If you gotta spy
     on your kid you probably are
doing something wrong.

Those "good" and "fairly
     good" positions are the ones
that need strengthening.

It's safe to assume
     at least some payments haven't
even reached him yet.

My day starts around
     4-6am and ends around 10pm.
Great! Will do so, thanks!

I once said "Cool tat,
     but that's not acceptable
ID under state law."

Any new updates?
     Hope all is well! I know how
terrible it is.

It may just bite you
     in the ass later. edit:
spelling Background link?

Exactly, they aren't
     discussing and coming up
with a solution.

Oh right, so we're just
     flagrantly ripping content
from other sims now?

Then you are OK
     with the shit he proved exists?
Ultraviolet.

I can't do a whole
     lot and it feels like my leg
is going to rip.

I hope she remains
     alone, chances are she will
with that attitude.

I'd agree there, but
     Chadli was better this year
in my opinion.

They're both terrible,
     arguing which one is worse
is kinda pointless.

In the case that I'm
     talking about, the LED is
part of the circuit.

Easy to chant tho.
     How can he be batman if
he doesn't have eyes?

I am a big fan
     and can't believe where people
choose to stand and watch.

Do you even lift?
     The cat looks traumatize from
being brushed. Mirror!

I was like a weak
     th6 and everyone else
was th7 and up.

If not keep that shit
     to yourself, don't spew that here.
[deleted] Fuck you.

For a successful
     Mars landing, they probably need
dozens of launches.

How about you get
     out of Taipei and visit
another city?

so in other words,
     Mini is a relative
term, not absolute.

That's fucked, really, what
     is it other than a 3D
model in a game?

I'm not a police
     officer but I do know
the answer to this.

I think that he does
     look like the traitor type, but
not with the marines.

It wasn't the same
     farmer, but it was probably
meant to reference him.

LET ME AT THEM I'm
     gonna pay for this, then we'll
find a flower shop.

He could be stupid
     and allow her to mess him
around for ages.

Being a hacker
     doing illegal things makes
one a criminal.

Maybe someone else
     sees the problems and tries hard
to innovate roads.

Forgetting these points
     are almost definitely
why it was removed.

Gals most likely on
     their way to some northern base
or The octagon.

Next time research what
     you're talking about before
opening your mouth.

They just understand
     certain repeated commands
which you teach to them.

Good job by Rollins
     to not run into it, but
that's all on Murphy.

You're right. Fair enough...
     That's fucking awesome and you're
fucking awesome, too!

Edit: Should probably
     call in and ask whats goin on,
not much we can do.

Could it be that one
     town that was covered in Sea
Foam? You and me both.

If your next option
     is to break it off then you
have nothing to lose.

Never put your hands
     above your head, it opens
you up to attack.

How do you define
     "slid back?" [deleted] I love
that album rain man!

I'd say both. For how
     long did you worry about
that apostrophe?

Forgetting these points
     are almost definitely
why it was removed.

I don't know, I'm just
     glad I can get a hard on
for anything. Thanks!

It's not quite ozone,
     but it's clean, not soapy, fresh,
and a little weird.

As for the heating
     pad, that's a good idea.
Can she move at all?

You've tried appealing
     to her rational side, to no
apparent effect.

Rich people shouldn't
     be able to simply buy
off their punishments.

Don't close your request
     yet though, because I'm not sure.
Well that's what I meant.

Goddamn my buddy
     doll was burned in a trash can
as I watched in glee.

BEAT LA! Farewell, dude.
     There's no denying the show
has changed a whole lot.

Best: Beetlejuice Worst:
     Dark Shadows Well the getting
sick thing is easy.

Literally every
     soldier who was there can tell
you the true story.

Some of their new songs
     are good too, like Just To Get
High and Lullaby.

It took me a full
     two minutes to figure out
where the beef came from.

I don't think OP was
     down talking anyone. Sheesh!
My thoughts exactly!

So I'll be looking
     for some nice places to hang
out and meet people.

[deleted] That would
     not fly here. Whatsoever.
You want a free room?

Turtle didn't have flash,
     he shouldn't have been so far
up in the first place.

I definitely
     feel as if I have improved
over the last week.

Except he sneezes
     and ends up with a season
ending injury.

[deleted] How can
     you have any shipping if
you don't freeze your meat?

I'm Jeremy wade.
     Every river monster is
actually a bull shark.

Can we get them on
     the next cask force so their name
is on the bottle.

Atom Atom fruit...
     Can control atom, over
powered to the max...

It was clean, it was
     tidy, and there weren't many
other patients there.

It is kind of like
     checking out someone's music
or book collection.

Still if they decide
     to annoy you, you can do
as my father did.

Fuck me right? I can
     actually hear a sad trombone
slide at the end there.

Sorry but I don't
     get how pink walls make you think
you can take the base.

Last two weeks the graph
     has fluctuated but not
decreased like it was.

[deleted] This is
     exactly what I would say.
Live the creed yourself...

As for the power,
     is the first one basically
Darwin from "First Class"?

You're not liable
     to be attacked by bigots
just because you're bald.

Because you are not
     just a kid, you are their life's
entire project.

And everybody
     involved immediately
knew what he did there.

I don't think my brain
     even operates the same
way anymore." Thanks!

The can may have spun
     but the can itself was not
moving in an arc.

How about we talk
     about the real issue here,
and that's mental health.

Politico May
     have a copy but they are
not putting it out.

It shouldn't be there
     if it's not something I bought,
and it's not installed.

How many of you
     honestly care what the moon
looked like? It was white.

All his hard work, his
     life, his very existence
will be forgotten.

More simply: What is
     the *source* of a character's
inner monologue?

He left pretty quick.
     Wat. This was pure luck. The black
guy broke his own leg.

That's what it's supposed
     to look like at this phase, good,
progressing nicely.

I like this. I feel
     like this is the exact love
I want in my life.

Hopefully they are
     made to work on the world cup
stadium and die.

But I personally
     have disliked every flavor
I've received from them.

Just like the word gay
     isn't used for the meaning
happy anymore.

I'm hearing some say
     in here they won't be honored.
Is this true? ALMOST.

[deleted] Go back,
     nothing to be found here but
bigots You are right.

Looks like we're going
     to the movies tomorrow,
thanks for the input!

I mean.. It *IS* French.
     Man, he looks like he could still
be out there playing!

The mod chose to come
     out and post in that thread, thus
exposing himself.

MOMMY! I don't think
     Dig made a single mistake
or wrong decision.

game last year but got
     bored of it, and i'm looking
to play it again.

DISCLAIMER: These are
     competitive picks, just some
fun things you COULD do.

Your luck that the same
     villager has been chosen
twice in one census.

If you lift, focus
     on increasing the weight, not
your appendage girth.

That's right baby, you
     rub those adverbs on my face.
Flash them articles.

I'd say they could use
     Classic, since Theory won't be
home to play either.

Hard to say given
     the picture, but the sleeve might
be a little long.

[deleted] Ok
     thank u ill keep my eye out
for it to pop up.

Only thing that is
     easy to root really is
nexus devices.

Definitely, but
     he should have been arrested
and tried. Not murdered.

I'm just curious,
     what makes this motorcycle
rider a jackass?

Actually, they probably
     wouldn't have started the whole
thing in the first place.

I went in there one
     summer for a trim and came
out with a bowl cut.

that's cool, but i can't
     deal when people stick the tongue
out with jeans and stuff.

I wanna ask what
     but I so don't want to know.
[deleted] Awesome.

Then don't, just like you
     said it really have nothing
to do with riding.

Where in the hell do
     you guys find money to spend
this much on cigars?!?

Resembles a beached
     whale, especially with the fur.
Gorgeous nonetheless.

Forgetting these points
     are almost definitely
why it was removed.

Your life could be short
     and brutal, but imagine
the things you could see.

Let me know if you
     ever get a chance to run
this by your doctor.

I don't have nearly
     enough friends and NO guy friends
anymore, just girls.

In other words, you
     give everything for them (but
not your happiness.

Someone using you
     to accomplish a task, check..
How much do you weigh?

Which parts do you need?
     Wireless adapter or will
you be using LAN?

Thanks. I was using
     this, but in halves and that was
ok for a while.

It's like awful 90s
     soft rock but in a language
I can't understand.

There is no item
     with the destroyer scythe skin
on it. Undying.

No problem dude, glad
     I could help you inch your way
toward the solution.

It's absolutely
     fine to put your money shot
deep inside it. OH!

Hell, you might as well
     be in Central Park to "get
away from it all".

\o/!!!! It does if those
     two "better" teams are themselves
playing horribly.

Blue and Ozone are
     probably the two best teams on
the planet right now.

I think they can't run
     past midnight by city regs.
Where is this map from?

Deep learning has made
     some real breakthroughs in natural
language processing.

Damn you. Ah, alright.
     Thanks. [deleted] OH DEAR GOD
KILL IT WITH FIRE GNOMES!

I hear the bar is
     stocked with almost every drink
you can imagine.

Those weren't the authors
     but I can't remember who
the OP said it was.

You guys will either
     stay really close friends or lose
touch and barely talk.

I can deal with up
     and down days to come, as long
as there are up days.

I've helped fix a few
     trucks and tractors in my day,
but never a boat.

I am pretty sure
     you are right, but I can't help
but feel cynical.

That's an extremely
     mature and intelligent
statement, good job dude.

How many people
     in LA or Chi would want one
for the away games?

Seriously, you
     could have used the search function.
*she looks down* But why?

But it's always nice
     to have a thousand people
liking what you wrote.

So he gets the same
     treatment by the fans as Braun
does on the road, right?