Reddit Haikus

I'm living with two
     girls in company housing
for my internship.

I'm just commenting
     on it. I'm not complaining.
Shutout Harrison!

I've had the classic
     Warwick splash art as my phone
wallpaper for months.

I hope you allow
     yourself to accomplish that.
best of luck to you.

Not to mention glass
     is freaking heavy for its
recycle value.

You can just get out
     there and experience life
in all kinds of ways.

By the time I set
     the controller down, I had
almost beat the game.

You don't goto war
     with an entire country
over one person.

There is a reason
     that regular tax is not
even charged on food.

That hack, Feeney, should
     never be allowed to work
in this town again.

As you know, we can't
     print more because then there would
be too much money.

beat on on goth, beat
     on the goth, beat on the goth
with a kitchen cloth.

that hurts to read You
     know some fucking idiots.
Different dimension.

Pretty crappy but
     I'm alive. I'm up to be
your chatting buddy.

But to everyone
     else it just looked like you missed
my point. Nevermind.

We get a decent
     amount of handicraft posts,
and they're good ones too.

You have to have some
     serious strong back muscles
to dodge those punches.

Watched one lunatic,
     one ice pick the other day.
Felt nothing really.

Head to the town pump.
     It's pretty laid back and you
just may see me there.

Honestly you can
     play through all of it in like,
five or ten minutes.

Fuck that guy. I'd sell
     ASAP while gold is
still worth anything.

As a brand brand brand
     brand brand new teacher, I was
glad to read this post.

Have you ever been
     asked to do something you felt
was unethical?

Ever since I was
     little I've dreamed of owning
lots of property.

My mom reminds me
     constantly how she's praying
for me all the time.

Is he saving beer
     from a flood or passing beer
out during a flood?

So if you are poor
     and in ill health you should join
the military?

But I know I'll shoot
     myself when its on sale... Yes.
Yes to all of this.

This probably goes way
     past your problem, but it might
help in the future.

However the whole
     adjustable part to them
feels quite gimmicky.

Figure that out, then
     wedge it in- with a crowbar
if necessary.

I don't suppose you
     own a shovel, otherwise
you could bury it.

What're they cut with?
     I didn't exclusively mean
the United States.

Many people are
     looking forward to seeing
what happens this time.

After few days when
     you call to check up, the phone
goes right to voicemail.

He takes a second
     and realizes everything
really is ok.

EASY! When Herbert
     the Pervert dreams he marries
Chris in Family Guy.

I don't really buy
     the separated school thing.
I would like some proof.

Both of them make me
     weep like a little baby,
and it's wonderful.

They are generally
     very playful and the males
have huge balls. ow ow!

It works well if you
     are efficient about it,
like OP said above.

Nobody knew how
     strange it looked because the world
was still black & white.

It got to the point
     where I didn't want to even
put out anymore.

When I got an E
     rating in Sonic Heroes,
I was so confused.

you're both fuck as fuck.
     Now you owe me. You, sir, just
made me cry laughing.

Think about each one.
     Why did it make you happy?
Take some notes on it.

I genuinely
     appreciate the mini
science lesson. Thanks!

I am so jealous!
     I assume by 'Fest' you mean
This Is Hardcore, right?

You were technically
     correct in saying that oil
is renewable.

I like them. To say
     at the very least, it's *weird*.
A good weird, but weird.

We had a midnight
     blue car, and in the summer
the AC went out.

Alaskan Rep here.
     Highschool kids love red solo
cups and their Coors Lite.

I wholeheartedly
     dislike referring to him
by just his first name.

I don't think either
     is bad, and they both sound like
good fits for the band.

I would choose benders,
     because only a select
few benders are bad.

Sorry for the long
     (and delayed) response again,
it's a bad habit.

Just call the places
     you're interested in joining
and ask. Problem solved.

The tradition spawned
     for many reasons, often
religious beliefs.

Interesting style on
     the horn, and that mouth is huge,
but it works I think.

The bastards. Lets all
     burn our official poster
sized maps together!!!

You ruined my life
     and you ruined my chances
with Emily Woods.

The Glass Castle is
     actually a really good book,
I really liked it.

I better cancel
     the parts I ordered else where.
Thanks for the heads up.

Gears has a little
     bit of a learning curve, but
we can carry you.

Shut up. Just wanted
     to motivate you before
we ran lol.

Because again, you
     have to learn the in and outs.
How does it function?

How does it function?
     How many shots does it take
for a kill? What range?

May it be Zelda
     skyward sword, or new super
mario brothers.

Inside by one step:
     directly in front of you
is my main dresser.

It was super close.
     I can't really blame the guy
for making the call.

I can totally
     see a desperate Orlando
dump Howard for Wade.

My best friends farmer
     parents were summa cum laude
college graduates.

You can easily
     get all the options you would
need for under $20K.

The look on his face
     after he slaps her "Oh fuck
did I just do that?

Pulverize your dried
     mushrooms into the smallest
pieces possible.

we would all rather
     you do that so that you don't
spread your STDs.

Great point. But I do
     not think he's asking the game
to be easier.

If they think you're too
     old that rule won't matter much
I don't imagine.

Do it because you
     are her friend, or don't because
your bed is your space.

fit sucks, legs fit like
     skinny jeans on weight lifter
thick legs. Need new pants.

We are more male than
     female students in our school.
So that would be weird.

Good point. Or you know
     the tv show of the same
name Yeah, sounds awesome!

imagine having
     to pose like that so your mom
can take the picture.

Magnets Link? Thank you!
     You'll get there soon! I'm sending
labor vibes your way.

[deleted] Dammit,
     you're not supposed to reveal
your trick! Lol!

I wish you the best.
     Don't need a happy ending
Mr Garrison?

I can't help but read
     the text which takes away from
the experience.

I get to come home
     to smoke weed and drinking booze
until I pass out.

Thanks for replying
     with that info, I never
knew that part of it.

I like you're outfits
     in parades and when you ride
around on horses.

Not to creep him out
     or anything, just to shake
his hand or something.

Am I wrong or do
     you not still receive comment
karma from self posts?

You ask what you do!
     That's what you do. You did it!
Congratulations.

I think I know what
     you could do to toggle what
the assassins do.

Because it implies
     that classical and folk are
completely divorced?

That band changed my life.
     Great looking truck I don't blame
you for missing it!

I was surprised when
     she told me, though I listen
to them too. Fun fact!

Usually, their lips
     are smooth and slightly moist too.
It feels wonderful.

All that is going
     to tell you is that I think
you are immature.

Internet friends are
     ok, but not quite the same
as friends in real life.

Nice to know there are
     people out there who will help
you just to help you.

The original
     conversation has nothing
to do with her rights.

The black fluid seeps
     onto the ground and causes
the earthworms to change.

I mean was it like
     you were drunk at a party
or you planned it out?

Fuck them. Gay people
     are the best minority
America has.

You have to maintain
     the consistency to get
your message across.

Why oh why are there
     no people in my family
that are worth a damn.

She's a whore. Also,
     she calls now and then to try
to "borrow" money.

She could barely breathe,
     as her asthma was kicking
into overdrive.

By pasta. My first
     listen is in progress, thanks
for the suggestion.

Dwarf Fortress, Liberal
     Crime Squad, Stone Soup. It could be
in a ponytail.

A single lesson
     at the driving school will show
you how to do this.

How come Atheism
     is safe from criticism
but religions aren't?

My character has
     never been effected by
the her chicken spell.

She told the old man
     that her boyfriend knew she would
be awesome in bed.

So what the fuck would
     you know telling someone else
how they should? Hell yes.

Apparently. I...
     I'd consider using it,
if I were alone.

Well, maybe not _loved_,
     but I've had jobs that I've liked
and found fulfilling.

I trust the person
     or thing to your right (but not
the one to your left).

scratch that, water is
     probably a good idea.
Someone hates these cans!

Your predictions are
     based on an AH that doesn't
trade in real money.

And yet, these women
     will be back out there at some
point in the future.

I knew I liked Pink
     Floyd, but it wasn't a rush
to get these albums.

The "soft sciences"
     don't change anything unless
people want to change.

My friend had dropped his
     pants and was smacking his bare
bum towards our teacher.

People will pay scam
     artists to get messages
from their dead loved ones.

What set her apart
     from other dream characters?
Did she say she was?

I believe that if
     I play the lottery once
that I will not win.

Thanks. I was going
     to give up a lot moving
to Europe with her.

Unfortunately,
     the album is not as good
as Kid A imo.

The government can
     have a pawn in the game just
like anyone else.

You called him a dick...
     No one was being hateful
except you. Be nice!

it was posted here
     awhile ago but I can't
find it anymore.

I don't know where all
     these white cases are coming
from, but I love them.

Good find though! I guess
     your alpha took me grocery
shopping after all.

I was also there
     and there were plenty of Nats
fans in my section.

Just doing my job.
     [deleted] Slap me on toast,
because I'm jelly.

I'm recovering
     from gallbladder removal
surgery right now.

Learn and grow from it,
     because the alternative
is just terrible.

They were both cheating,
     among other things that were
all shady as fuck.

That's all pretty much
     anyone knows about most
cultures, save their own.

But actually spending
     time with her wasn't as cool
as it should have been.

Like. **EVERYONE**. Else.
     I remember 6th grade
He should at this point.

Yes, it sucks so bad.
     I'll be sitting in my hot
tub enjoying it!

I have enough cats
     so another dog seems like
the reasonable choice.

he is the one who
     looked at my guitar playing.
and what i enjoy.

Thanks! And don't worry
     I already understand
how all that works out.

[deleted] Thank you
     so much for actually taking
the time to answer!

but the important
     thing is to know your limits.
and know when to stop.

Shit will keep getting
     worse, and the feeling doesn't
go away. Ever.

And grandpa was on
     to something, my brother's car
was a piece of shit.

All I want to know
     is who thinks up these studies
and then who does them?

Yeah I know, I just
     couldn't think of a better
way of wording it.

I know that increased
     stress is associated
with increased blinking.

An injunction on
     retail dispensary bans
would be surprising.

I am interested
     in your preconceived notions
regarding healthcare.

Also I'm angry
     and yelling at a keyboard.
I apologize.

Or, in a nutshell,
     it is a morality
choice over freedom.

Which model? Same thing
     as a Pinto, so I see
no problem with them.

Be in the present
     moment and listen to what
people are saying.

Next you're gonna ask
     if you're the only one who
didn't like it. Yes, why?

I worked with many
     people from other countries
while in the Army.

This is some pretty
     serious bullshit though. fuck...
I have that same itch.

I have that same itch.
     Although the smelling part is
totally conscious.

Yes, I am above
     others who live their lives based
on guess work and faith.

Honestly, this bread
     is going to the trash soon
if you don't want it.

You don't pick and choose
     what company is required
to collect sales tax.

WHAT IS WRONG WITH THEM.
     I may have acted out on
occasion, but this?

No Zak today but
     I wouldn't want to risk him
in this match either.

To think Osama
     hated us for killing "his
people" is misplaced.

That comparison
     is a "retarded fatal
error" honestly.

If you are doing
     good then *high five* he may be
smiling, I would have.

my highest was one
     where I was talking about
my time as a PI.

[deleted] BOMB DROPPED!!!
     yes, i'd do far more for that.
goats could be involved.

I love my own brand,
     even when they reek, but not
in the damn shower.

I have never fucked
     up in a way that could get
other people killed.

You can trigger those
     traps by shooting the pressure
plate with an arrow.

Do boys like their butt
     holes being played with while you
give them a blow job?

He should think about
     buying an inexpensive
domain name for it.

While this is always
     appreciated, not quite
what I'm looking for.

I'd hope there was planes
     to fly to Hawaii, is
what I meant by that.

Say, did you hear they're
     opening a new Sonic
at 4th and Main?

[deleted] "His name
     is my name too" Because you
probably won't get one?

Seeing new people
     is what I need to work on,
but it can be done.

Mules do you no good
     if you have no idea
what you are facing.

His job to make nerds
     rage over retarded shit
has been completed.

A series of web
     forums I used to frequent
for variety.

University?
     I need to know how this ends!
Your text was cut off.

I see amazon
     reviews of products that are
crap, and I don't buy.

I just hope they pack
     in a much improved Metal
Gear Online with this.

Is that how it would
     work or do I need something
else along the way?

Ugh, now I'm going
     to be thinking about stuff
and feeling feelings.

I said that hormones
     should not be an influence
on her behavior.

Yummy lol
     Because animals are like
retarded people.

Definitely will.
     I didn't know that existed.
Thanks for the heads up.

We have too many
     college graduates and not
enough college jobs.

And the last picture
     was adorable (the long
hair did it for me).

I doubt he will make
     you get rid of it if you
never bring it up?

I can't agree more.
     What I wouldn't give to be
free of my glasses!

Taxes are going
     to be brutal at the rate
that it's increasing.

It's so weird to hear
     folks talking about getting
crap for being bi.