Reddit Haikus

It's strange to say this,
     but it feels like she's gone off
to war or something.

The earlier car
     was from Washington State, too.
This is my West Coast.

By definition,
     "holy" means "set apart", not
morally upright.

Keep in mind its not
     just the cops you are helping,
it's your fellow man.

[deleted] My child's
     daycare (not a church) has these
in the infant rooms.

I've always wanted
     to watch it but just can't bring
myself to do it.

[deleted] Awesome!
     Maybe move the "Now Playing"
to a darker place?

There is a woman
     in Times Square who calls herself
the naked cowgirl.

i just finally
     decided to do it Can't
say I can relate.

His broken nose, well
     that's because he ran into
the coffee table.

Thanks, that's a better
     answer than most I've received
to that inquiry.

Yeah, the Bill of Rights
     is made by man to prevent
abuse of power.

Once those issues are
     settled, no more windows will
ever be broken.

I like baseball, but
     there is nothing more boring
than college baseball.

Otherwise you'll just
     come across as pathetic,
ignorant and weak.

Sorry. So the one
     making the counter claim has
the burden of proof?

I only have one
     tattoo but I had it done
at Ink and Dagger.

Hopefully it will
     be at the end of this month
or early next month.

His wife even said
     when they had their New Years Eve
party we could come.

Short answer, yes, long
     answer, whatever you think
you feel like doing.

may come off a lil
     odd to even another
horny gentleman.

I beg to differ.
     Look at some of them at their
full resolution.

Edit: and I'm not
     sure not including a pic
will reduce the flood.

It's unfortunate
     the B Team lineup matched up
with a Rangers game.

It's a horrible
     waste of time and I feel worse
than when I lie down.

it'll be my first too.
     I came here only to post
that exact comment.

"They did this Katy
     Perry song, and then some song
by some old person.

But I would still hate
     to be in a big city
in any collapse.

There's really no team
     with a high pick worth Howard
that he would stay in.

I have a theory.
     You like this movie and there's
nothing wrong with that.

You are young and free
     so moving somewhere right now
would be good timing.

Carly Rae Jepsen
     Tell us what it's for. Also,
don't get that case. ME1.

Yeah I guess your right,
     I was just really impressed
by how fast they were.

I have heard there is
     more discussion than there used
to be, which is good.

I don't think it's rude
     to ask, seeing as you are
both signing a lease...

Didn't realize I was
     tip toeing until a wave
went over my head.

Ah, I see. I knew
     that voice from the trailer was
all too familiar.

It would be all too
     easy to do this with most
North Dakota towns.

Oh no, a business
     that wants to make money, what
ever will we do!?

Democracy is
     not a tyranny, it is
perfect liberty.

Please don't make me look
     up the passages, I'm not
*that* knowledgeable.

When the butter stops
     foaming and garlic begins
to brown, add the chard.

You can't blame others
     for your addiction My guess
would've been cobwebs..

there was a sound byte
     for the first comment, but it's
relatively old.

Since I also play
     on Latin America
now for example.

It's funny thinking
     about geographical
ignorance sometimes.

Can't watch him jerk his
     arms awkwardly, trying to get
his daughter away.

"Microwave laser"
     as opposed to "light maser".
A curious thing.

Easy does it on
     the whole "come to the dark side,
've haff cookies'" thing.

Budweiser, Miller,
     Coors, Pabst Blue Ribbon. I don't
know them all, sorry.

Either you don't know
     what "literally" means or you
are an idiot.

Black Freighter was filmed
     separately, but it couldn't
have made sense in film.

i like this whole "let's
     make everything really small"
thing that's going on.

It's exactly how
     I remember it during
my stay last summer.

Both she and I will
     die some day, but that's really
not such a bad thing.

If not then you might
     have blocked them in a fire wall
or something like that.

does the money you
     spent there support the people
you want to support?

With the pump actions
     you have to be more careful
with your shot placement.

it doesn't change who
     he is or what he believes...
Oh fuck, not again!

I hear so many
     people say that Fire Nation
is based on China.

Nothing wrong with that,
     and you can certainly choose
to play by those rules.

My elementary
     school taught me that Columbus
proved the world was round.

But if you're male or
     don't have sole custody, that's
not going to work.

All mouthpieces are
     sterling silver or stainless
steel with a brass core.

Especially Fed Ex.
     So really, it's all about
your local people.

Not a joke. Damn, that's
     great knowing your brother got
the help he needed.

That's great but i think
     his generalization is
generally correct.

They want girls. The guys
     who don't dance are the ones who
aren't there to pick up.

Do they come out on
     your route and use a metal
detector on you?

my friend said he took
     the picture and I've never
seen it anywhere.

If you are looking
     for ransom, I can tell you
I don't have money.

Not like anything
     else important happens here.
Just useless drama.

When running straight down
     your vision is massively
hindered by the bars.

So far, my family
     has been very supportive,
and understanding.

I'm not too sure how
     cool that would look, that's a bit
too much for me. So?

You're a great person
     and anybody would be
lucky to know you.

They always have been
     and always will be the most
shit on department.

Gave him some money
     as he was being harassed
by the local law.

Also, I'm pretty
     sure borax is nontoxic
to humans and pets.

It's actually also
     the first place I ever heard
the word "atheist".

Sadly I leave on
     Tuesday. Folks reading this should
hit this guy up yo!

Why are you talking
     about dicks and sucking them
all of a sudden?

It is a growing
     acceptance of the message
into the mainstream.

Not until these shit
     for brains idiots are run
out of Ottawa.

Religion is just
     another hypothesis
to explain the world.

if you get married,
     I will buy you a treadmill
and a haircut kit.

How we interact
     with one another almost
boils down to a dance.

[deleted] I just
     said "Oh my god me too" out
loud REALLY loudly.

I can't justify
     spending that much when I can't
watch the finals live.

[deleted] Happy
     Birthday Colt. You gotta use
your teeth to get in.

It's a habit from
     my mother back when downtowns
were scary places.

When someone doesn't
     put the new toilet paper
roll on the roller.

At one point I sat
     back and wondered what in gods
name I was doing.

We are to learn from
     the lessons of life and seek
salvation and truth.

low fluid levels
     sometimes cause slipping, maybe
you will get lucky.

Said exactly what
     I always think. I've always
enjoyed that fellow.

Please don't troll. If you
     doubt, do some research and come
back with your findings.

The only difference
     is my source is based in fact
while this post is false.

it's weird and i can't
     really explain it, but it's
fascinating What?

It may have had his
     allegiance but it wasn't
in his possession.

He actually passed out
     in the bathroom and hit his
head on the toilet.

They would report back
     to her if i was talking
to another girl.

I don't know about
     double tap but swipe up has
always suited me.

I like Smith I think
     he is doing a bang up
job as the Doctor.

Fan sites especially
     seem to be easy targets
for Chinese hackers.

It definitely
     has issues once weapons get
into the mix though.

I kept getting "oh
     come on, just another drink"
every five minutes.

One lady I knew
     got a rose on each breast when
she was in her teens.

It's an effusive
     governess gushing about
everything she likes.

It might be better
     to stay out of serious,
personal threads though.

That's fine, I don't know
     how long I'll be staying but
we'll figure it out.

This way he cannot
     interrupt you and do his
usual antics.

The fast paced 'shooter'
     reflexes help him react
quickly and it shows.

this is a wee bit
     big, in every way, but you
get the idea.

That could be a fluke,
     my point was the rise and fall
as the wind hit it.

But he received them,
     I guess. keyword was SET [You'll
shoot your eye out, kid!

I'm glad. It seemed like
     some people may not be sure.
I lost it at dog.

the moment i saw
     this, i thought back to a dream
i had long ago.

You're Welcome, Satan.
     Edit: Satan is allowed
five mistakes per day.

This comic reads just
     like a Jesus pamphlet ("Are
you feeling alone?

Do you sometimes feel
     like there's a greater power
looking out for you?

Joe dirt is awesome.
     [deleted] Sometimes... It's just
worth getting men's jeans.

Probably a woman.
     No, it totally makes sense.
I've heard that a *lot*.

All of a sudden
     one day I was just like... Wait...
I don't have to run.

You are so unique
     for having that perspective.
You know what? He's wrong.

Servers were playing
     up when I did the unlock,
might be part of it.

No need to thank me.
     [deleted] doing gods work
my friend I'm with you.

Could have made the Charm
     Heart perhaps on fire as well.
I love the style though.

**Any inversion
     will feel heavy if the legs
do not do their work.

Omg. That shit
     is crazy.. Not to my ex.
He kidnapped our kid.

That shit is crazy..
     Not to my ex. He kidnapped
our kid. holy fuck.

the only thing you'll
     be able to do is call
animal control.

I don't even know
     what the hell my karma is
right now. I don't care.

Just so you know, most
     smoke looks exactly the same
as bonfire smoke.

I wasn't aware
     that Song of the South was based
on Gullah culture.

If Sony pushes
     ahead into 4k, it will
be the death of them.

The neighborhood you
     live in kind of determine
the answers you'll get.

Maybe in a few
     months we'll spontaneously
go on long ass rides.

And it still welcomes
     you as a member should you
choose to stay within.

But, maybe you could
     attract them with rotten flesh
(giving it a use).

Thanks for fact checking.
     I'd give my left nut to be
able to see that.

It was a little
     silly, but don't shit on him
for making a joke.

GO BLUE STREAKS I won
     "Most Spontaneous". The fuck
does that even mean?

Finally, after
     as long as possible, rinse
the conditioner.

My internet sucks
     hard and it takes forever
to download something.

Plus who on earth thinks
     the servers for online games
will always be up?

I've seen another
     person mention it Jameson.
That's all a girl needs.

However I will
     watch those videos and let
you guys know my thoughts.

In my mind I can't
     condemn someone for something
that they were born with.

I remember this.
     I also saw it on Bill
Nye the Science Guy.

It just seems *boring*.
     I also don't like the way
the pants seem to fit.

You've got the sexy
     artist look and the sweet good
guy look all in one.

Naturally, this didn't
     faze me, I knew I wasn't
hitting it in there.

I accept that there
     are parts of the universe
which aren't understood.

My period was
     actually *longer* on the pill
and made me depressed.

I have a cartoon
     homicidal maniac
tattooed on my leg.

Thanks I like them too!
     Here's my local Goodwill find.
[Sometimes I Just Sits.

Oh you are so wrong.
     I've had Comcast Dish Network
and Directv.

My wife's parents are
     Polish and will only vote
for Polish people.

The smell is so strong
     that I can "taste" the tar, if
you know what I mean.

Basically, you just
     can't communicate with each
other for a bit.

I await the pic.
     Eerie. What does prevalence
have to do with shame?

The funny part is
     that now I'm the only one
that he'll take treats from.

The entire thing,
     however, needs to be seen
once and only once.

That one. [deleted]
     Nah, he didn't embarrass them.
Half their team was hurt.

Actually that's probably
     just latency, and that will
never go away.

Genders confuse me.
     It's why I'm not popular
at the local bar.

I think if you didn't
     like the first season, then you
won't like the second.

Sure you may have talked
     about her actions, but you
never resolved them.

You might not realize
     this but she does, because she's
the one who caused it.

Hopefully it'll work
     for you too. Na, not that high.
Besides, I'm married.

Why spend money on
     public transit when we could
be repairing roads?

The classic tourist
     visit is Honolulu
and Waikiki Beach.

And may be I will
     or won't meet a guy who does
show how much he cares.

I could send you one
     or two on the computer
as well if you'd like!

The dude is awesome.
     I might even say, better
looking than Damon.

Most hedgehogs don't like
     being exposed to the light
as they're nocturnal.

Do you get off on
     thinking you upset people
on the internet?

It's one of my kids'
     favorite places and we'll be
sad to see it go.

However, I see
     no principal distinction
between those cases.

I was unmoved by
     this comment until i read
your name, well done sir.

[deleted] I'd like
     to think most would convert if
there were some hard facts.

However I bet
     I'm the most successful or
close to it. Yummy!

At what other point
     was there an indication
that this could happen?

Why didn't he just run,
     fucking thing wasn't even
calibrated right.

Nailed him. Do you know
     someone who works at a bar?
If so, talk to them.

But most people don't
     show reasonable concern toward
nuclear power.

Yeah that's it, listen
     to the creepy guy watching
you through your window.

Either you're with God
     and the Word of God, or you
aren't. Where is the line?

It's slow, messy work,
     but if done correctly, should
not damage your paint.

She needs to realize
     that her parents are acting
out of shock and fear.

Most of the time it's
     close to my own, personally,
sometimes it isn't.

There are so many
     more things you can do to shape
your environment.

Beating a kids ass
     when it doesn't fix things will
only cause problems.

That wasn't too bad,
     its defiantly unique.
Thanks for the knowledge.

yeah, i thought so too,
     but why the heck is she BLUE
in eagle vision?

They made some missteps,
     but it's still a completely
awesome game to play.

Hey I know we all
     look alike, but you gotta
be more specific.

I never comment
     because I've been a closet
atheist for years.

So sometimes one kid
     would get screwed, and the next one
would get two sodas.

i just adore it.
     and plus, it looks kind of cool
while advertising.