Reddit Haikus

From your lips to ~~God's~~
     Richard Seymour's ears. I don't
know how it happened.

Humans are fickle.
     It will ALWAYS leak somehow.
History tells us this.

So white people are
     not the only one's who can't
tell Asians apart.

It took my a while
     to see my own weight loss, but
trust me man it's there!

thanks man You sir, can
     go get fucked in the anus
by a porcupine.

His dad was actually
     in a pretty famous rock
band (not sure the name).

[deleted] Reading
     that you were struck by lightning.
Many has been shed.

i like most other
     was initially repulsed
by the cell shading.

Your dad needs to freeze
     his credit cards, have the ones
your mom opened closed.

Done! That first clover
     gave you luck and now it keeps
building on itself.

I know it isn't
     optimal, but it would help
with the annoyance.

*BANG cloud of smoke...* Yes.
     On the forums it is brought
up regularly.

My story? Perhaps,
     one day, I shall the darkness
and light of my days.

You have to. Get. That.
     Pinky. Up there. lol.
my version: Hello?

Go smoke a bowl ;D
     I didn't even notice that,
he's there I promise!

That's thousands of times
     cleaner than a hospital
operating room.

Nevermind then :P
     This is great! You got some flow
and i like the beat.

Yea sounds a lot like
     L2 and possibly even
more involved than L2.

Unfortunately
     I do think the really good
ones are gone for good.

Or no mod at all,
     I seriously don't do
much of anything.

i only click on
     these threads to ensure that you're
keeping up with them.

It's in person by
     two service members, and then
followed in writing.

My bad! OH GOD YES!
     I CAN FEEL THE CLEANLINESS
PURGING THROUGH MY VEINS!!!

How is this any
     different from a girl asking
for guys to play with?

He ended his life
     to stop others from dying
while trying to save him.

This is why I stand
     with Rick on the decision
to keep it secret.

I think the perfect
     ending to House would be if
he dies of Lupus.

Certainly, work on
     your slap technique, but also
get him back in line.

SHUT UP BITCH Marching
     Band. I was in 8th grade
he was a sophomore.

Education is
     not about imposing one's
beliefs on others.

The main difference here
     is that Mass Effect is, first
and foremost, a GAME.

It's better to start
     light and get heavier than
starting too heavy.

He suddenly bolts
     into his room, and runs out
to the balcony.

How am I supposed
     to model them if I don't
find out about them?

I didn't think they were
     rude, I actually responded
that way as a joke.

This is why headache
     "remedies" like Excedrin
make me so angry...

The keyboard shortcuts
     are just muscle memory.
You learn by doing.

Rev matching is not
     required for most cars these days.
Also, what city?

You've obviously
     never been to priest lake than.
It's one epic place.

The dietary
     habits of trees and gaming
really worry me.

You read the first line,
     wait, and the punchline actually
makes you laugh out loud.

However, we can
     guess from his post that it is
fairly limited.

They also offer
     free taxi service to help
anyone get home.

Just because law school
     used to be worth it doesn't
mean that it is now.

Blaming the victims
     is a shitty thing to do.
Yeah.... that's really bad.

She's cute! Well, I think
     with time you will grow to be
able to tell her.

A biker can ride
     in the middle of his lane
if he wants. Too soon?

I am hard headed,
     and yes, I like to argue.
But don't kid yourself.

The people who like
     Firefly really like it.
Watch a few and see.

[The retraction by
     this American Life goes
into more detail.

Magee So this is
     gonna be a thing now, eh?
I approve. agreed.

On a related
     note, you should always read things
before signing them.

Maybe I should just
     stop being a little bitch
and man the fuck up.

Thanks for the solid
     advice and genuinely
taking an interest.

If she'd gone to PORT,
     the ship wouldn't have just crashed
into the planet!

Their nicotine gum,
     potato chips and frozen
pizza are AWESOME.

just being better
     than everyone and going
to an elite school.

It shouldn't take her
     long figure out she gets food
while she's at your side.

This is one of those
     things that's is just too stupid
to be real. Troll yes.

This was like average
     (if that) for a medic clip
from competitive.

Watching jets take off
     and land (vertically) never
really got that old.

Also I agree
     about the whole "confidence
in decision" thing.

Just the way it goes.
     I don't understand why you
think this is funny.

So i would really
     recommend wizard over
huntress for farming.

Not sure how many
     are still willing to fall on
that sword for the guy.

I consider most
     good design to be subtle
and developing.

You need to convince
     your bosses that you're not there
just for the money.

If you really want
     to please me leave those panties
on and piss through them.

i do not feel like
     i have a lot of "privilege"
being a woman.

[deleted] If you
     can't talk about it with him,
why are you with him?

A father has two
     or three sons, a mother has
two or three daughters.

Chew valerian
     root and get more exercise.
You don't post enough.

Thanks for the warning!
     Sorry you had to go through
that, it sounds awful.

Overhead lighting
     will have better looking abs
then head on lighting.

I take it I'm not
     invited to the group ME
porn wank at your place.

Want to see Harlem
     Globetrotter "Flight Time" Lang on
Dancing with the Stars?

Funny how they don't
     turn crazy till after you
stick it in 'em, hey.

In the world we live
     in today, the statistics
aren't in your favor.

Good luck everyone!
     And a belated happy
birthday to you OP!

Maybe replace VATS
     with an overhead system
instead, or something.

What about bronzes?
     I applaud you for going
farther than I have!

The technology
     and the skill of the crew go
hand in hand as well.

Also, I found out
     that you can't amass wealth if
you're charitable.

What a race that was,
     good to see some good racing
coming from the US.

My brother showed me
     and he pretty much said "You
can try if you want.

Make the best of it.
     Yeah I think I will be fine
if I do this stuff.

The above picture
     cannot possibly be like
cutting your finger.

If so you should know
     to disregard ANYTHING
this faggot blurts out.

Yea, well look at his
     weapons and how wide open
Steve Smith always was.

How many games did
     another Broncos player
lead them to victory?

You could try that one.
     Would a share buyback in turn
lower market cap?

I find the AUG
     works for me, so I'm going
to keep using it.

I might try it on
     NI Massive just to try it.
Thanks a ton again.

[deleted] Just heard
     the sound a balloon makes when
you let out the air.

I'm not sure why you're
     opposed to women knowing
his true intentions.

So you give discounts
     to everyone that doesn't
ask for a discount?

Unfortunately
     we don't say "not one plus one
is three" in English.

[deleted] I say
     Wednesday and I totally
believe in Odin.

Wiz is a pretty
     good rapper, but his lyrics
have no depth at all.

At least your parents
     font have to miss each other.
Sorry bout your loss.

He ponders giving
     up and going to the Wall,
but is killed instead.

Your insides slowly
     turn to mush and no one can
really go near you.

He just went the wrong
     way about some of his most
recent decisions.

I agree that it's
     not likely but, as they say,
hope springs eternal.

CHECK OUT THOSE GRAPHICS!
     I was gonna post this one
if no one else did.

It's why so many
     games are just linear point
A to point B fare.

Also, it's pretty
     boring, and without context,
there's nothing special.

And then let other
     people choose to approach me
if they wanted to.

Was anyone else
     glad the guy riding the horse
got up right away?

Are record profits
     worth fucking over the whole
planet down the road?

I see. Mea culpa.
     It might've been trying to catch
some spaghetti sauce.

try bringing some girl
     from a bar, and then good luck
finding all your teeth.

[deleted] Global
     warming is profitable
for Canada. Mark?

I don't like how all
     this went down, but I'm happy
that he didn't sign here.

It's a great game, but
     READ THE RULES. Read them again,
read them one more time.

[deleted] Not sure
     if Judge Judy is a scam
or a circus act...

Apparently it's
     the way that mcdonalds works
because they'll do it.

Fuck peyton manning.
     He doesn't sign autographs
unless he gets paid.

But maybe I am
     wrong, and someone will describe
what they believe in.

I think its because
     the first game i actually got
good at was top gun.

I think we're going
     to go with this exact build.
Any more advice?

Give them hundreds more
     examples and they'll just keep
making excuses.

oh god I love these.
     Thank you! And I see what you
mean about Young Wolf's.

I could literally
     live the rest of my life on
one million dollars.

So it's safe to say
     I can keep using this card
at this temperature?

"Who's there?" "Alpaca"
     "Alpaca who?" "YOUR MOTHER'S
A WHORE!" How was that?

In my entire
     life in IT I have never
seen an card blow up.

I can't read this shit!!
     You sir have wasted my time!
They _used_ to be free.

They _used_ to be free.
     Some sort of legislation
made that go away.

this video is
     by far their funniest too*
Interesting to know!

His muscles are not
     supporting him, though, which is
likely what you mean.

I have heard this song
     hundreds of times, ever since
I was an infant.

Little did I know,
     there are places called strongholds...
You're in for a treat!

So I did this once
     three months ago and I still
have bits left unused.

He could have gotten
     out of the car if that girl
was truly crazy.

I think it is safe
     to assume they will remain
single stat for now.

What she said was not
     acceptable though in jest
might be passable.

None of the linemen
     signing were for huge dollars
either, which is nice.

It does not matter
     how young your siblings are, check
the credit report!

Good god. I have no
     idea how to respond
to this one. Oh geeze.

The awkward moment
     when you feel so awkward you
just start singing too.

He's towing the line
     and showing his loyalty.
Came here to post this.

In terms of the group
     now coming under rule by
Rick and Rick alone.

So how many years
     has it been since Toronto
has made the playoffs?

Actually Hank kills wife
     sounds like a great plot twist when
I think about it.

I'd already seen
     that first one, but the second
is genius. Genius.

Too bad you didn't know
     about this a month ago,
he's a great live show.

What's the lowest point
     you think you have been to while
working as Goofy?

Maybe if Polly
     Walker was on the show too.
And Lindsay Duncan.

I want stadium.
     Yeah Stadium I just made
that shit up right now.

Might run another
     one in the fall since this one
was so successful.

here i am thinking
     you feel sorry and then boom!
drug addict sister!

Those are amazing.
     I stand embarrassingly
corrected, thank you!

In my personal
     experience, he actually
seems like a cool dude.

I find we are all
     just a perception away
from eternity.

i liked the teapot.
     Americans never won
the war, the French did.

I want you to put
     the egg vibrator right where
your cage meets your crotch.

Also, I had no
     idea that lion cubs
made such weird noises.

i think it seems more
     cliche for those that have been
to the beach a bunch.

Good thing you're a Lab,
     Lab's LOVE water and you can
come and hang with me!!!

'report an error')
     that was amazing I loved
the old apple pipe.

I cried when Shane died
     but only because I felt
really sad for Rick.

Follow the Leader
     Sundown I get a discount
with my student ID.

Poorly. that poor old
     bastard has terrible taste
in beer. Room Service!

Then video files
     would be Windows only, or
x86 or ARM only.

This makes sense because
     stalker pro affects motion
triggered explosions.

Just because he can
     read braille doesn't mean he's blind.
F1, twice to follow.

Ten or fifteen years?
     I think you might be younger
than I thought you were.

We usually play
     archipelago on King.
What was his logic?

[deleted] This is
     what I look like when I flesh
out my facial hair.

This irritates me
     how the US military
is trying to spin this.

I see a wrangler,
     gunslinger and dat toolbox.
Now where's mah sentry!

I can edit, don't
     know if I can help but I'm
pretty good I think.

Ah, says Hume, but what
     makes you think that the future
will be like the past?

Flip again and cook
     for another three minutes
or until well browned.

The rest of the place
     is just rubbish and not worth
bothering over.

she's really worried
     Well you know what!? The Easter
Bunny isn't real!

Did I even bring
     cost into the equation?
No. Yes, they cost more.

Haters are gonna
     hate, but I really enjoy
his tunes while coding.

He has a story
     behind him that people know
and are following.

And "frustrating" is
     the perfect word to describe
the situation!

Besides inserts, do
     negatives with the leg press
with the leg that hurts.

C'mon. Maybe you
     need to put on smaller clothes,
clothes that fit better.

I'm not sure why you
     would have a problem with that.
Hey man, that's not nice.

[deleted] Being
     told I was special all through
secondary school.

Phil is my brother.
     He works in the retail shop
as far as I know.

I've heard of stoner
     doom metal but I haven't
listened to it much.

How many people
     enter for them to not lose
money doing that?

Look kinda ugly,
     but look comfy as hell too.
I shall purchase. Thanks.

Electric chainsaw
     would be sweet, that would be some
serious road rage.

You don't need to try
     to make up words for what I'm
"telling her" either.

Capitalism
     causes all sorts of problems.
It's far from perfect.

If this isn't true
     yet, it will be by the time
I have my degree.

Just thought I would share.
     I only logged in to post
the very same thing.

So, parts of the heart
     that go without oxygen
for too long will die.

The show still shines though.
     And no matter what you do,
watch all six series.

That women walking
     down the street in revealing
clothing deserved it.

Both of the words are
     derogatory, neither
worse then the other.

Maybe she just thought
     I was a sentinel or
meant to say soldier?

I found strong beers are
     the worst, with wines not causing
the effect so much.

I, for one, will bask
     in the glory of making
the harbour Earl Gray.